View Full Version : How long for you to adjust to a new kid

03-16-2012, 10:48 AM
Getting a new kid is exciting and stressful! How long does it take you on average to adjust to the new dynamic?

Sandbox Sally
03-16-2012, 12:11 PM
I'll let you know when it happens. I am currently pulling my hair out, as both newbies I started this week are screamers. Heavysigh...lol I think the last time I started a new one, it took about two weeks for everyone to settle in.

03-16-2012, 12:22 PM
A lot depends on how long it has been since you started a new one, started a child this age or the age mix of the group you have. That determines what you need to change - if the new baby is going to mean changing outside time so baby can nap or making the big kids play with lego only in a certain space and changing their normal routine it will take a lot longer than if the place is already set up for babies and it just means adding one more highchair to the kitchen and allowing 5 more minutes at diaper change time.

Any change takes a couple weeks to work out most of the kinks and then you can start to work on making the routine normal. This all hinges too on how well the child transitions to the group - screamers don't ever allow you to get back into a routine till they get over it.

03-16-2012, 07:18 PM
2-3 weeks I'd say? It can be tough!!!! Hang in there!

03-16-2012, 09:49 PM
Every child is different and every situation is different. I've had children start who were happy from the first day and then there was my 7 month screamer and my 4 month screamer. There is no rule, just do your very best, keep telling the parents what you need them to do to help or ask them about their routines and meet them in the middle.

And I agree with playfelt about getting complacent with an older group, then they go off to JK and you have to start over with babies and you are all out of practice. It takes lots of patience, and if the parents are with you, you'll get there.

Inspired by Reggio
03-17-2012, 12:35 PM
Yup - totally depends on the personality of the child in question, if they were 'prepared' for group care by their parents, how they were transitioned into the program either cold turkey or several short play dates with parents and than without before going the 'full day' sort of thing.

Typically in my experience it takes a couple weeks for them to get comfortable to be eating and sleeping normally and out of the crying A LOT during the day at every transition and so forth and about 2 months for me to get them to the stage where they NEVER cry anymore ... I have a new one whose been coming about 5 weeks now and he comes in happy now and reaches for me from his mom, he eats and drinks, he is sleeping better, he plays happy and moves through transitions better but good lord if I step out of his line of vision you would think someone pulled his toenails out ... he is not secure enough yet to trust that I too am coming BACK from the bathroom :rolleyes:

Dayhome Mamma
03-17-2012, 03:46 PM
For me it depends if they are part time or full time. For Full time, the first 3-5 days seem the hardest, and then it gets easier as they start to recognize the patterns of our day and they see that the other children are happy here and playing, etc...After two weeks they are usually pretty adjusted.
With part time, its much more work because of the breaks in between. Or maybe its the girls I have? One of them has been coming here for almost a year and still screams at the door sometimes at her parents leaving. But she is unique for sure. I personally think its because her parents have never reprimanded her for that behaviour so she just thinks its ok.
The second one too, seems to have attachment/departure issues though its been better but they haven't fully gone away. She doesn't scream anymore, but she does reach out her hands as they leave. Same problem I think. Both parents are just way too sweet and let them react in that way so they do. It makes me wonder whether its a girl thing? Maybe they are just more emotional in that way? With all the boys I've had it just takes about a week-two and then we're all good. They're happy to come here and life gets back to normal. Has anyone else noticed that difference?

Inspired by Reggio
03-17-2012, 04:51 PM
Oh I agree Dayhome Mamma - part time children take WAY LONGER ... I do not offer part time care to children under the age of two it is just too hard on the younger ones to adjust back and forth :(

Dayhome Mamma
03-19-2012, 12:05 AM
Oh I agree Dayhome Mamma - part time children take WAY LONGER ... I do not offer part time care to children under the age of two it is just too hard on the younger ones to adjust back and forth :(

Yes, I've learnt from this too. No more Part time kids. Its just totally not worth it. Money wise and Transitioning/work wise. I feel kind of stuck now because I have 3. So I feel obliged to continue as I have created a bond with them already. But once they are out, I will not be offering part time care at all anymore. I have even thought about "restructuring" at some point to only offer full time care, but I would feel guilty about doing that with the families I have, so for now it is the way it is.