First time potty learning in daycare; parent challenge... advice?

[Dreamalittledream]

I am now going through my first potty learning experiences now in my home daycare setting with 2 boys...my son, and another who are both almost 3. With my son, we are having a pretty relaxed approach, that being we have no sense of urgency that he has to get the concept right now. We're using pull-ups and potty chair during daycare hours and underwear/big toilet with seat otherwise. The other child is starting a full time head start program in Sept., for which he must be fully potty trained...so there is an urgency for her. At home Mom leaves him naked & puts him on the toilet every hour. Mom wants to do the same here (Naked? Ummm..no!); she has refused to use pull ups as he just goes in those like a diaper (I get that) but...she has agreed to go with plastic pants. Here at daycare he refuses to go on the potty & it is just impossible for me to leave everyone to go up a floor to the bathroom every hour...and then for the 10 min or so it takes him to go. So, my questions: Never used plastic pants, do they work in a daycare setting (ie. nap time), do you demand pull ups, any suggestions on overcoming the refusal to go on potty or overcoming bathroom location challenge? Someone posted recently about charging extra for children who are potty training...I totally get that!

[michellesmunchkins]

I refuse to allow them into daycare without a diaper or pull ups until they have been accident free here for a full month, and by accident free I mean THEY have to tell me they need to use the potty. I refuse to 'train' myself to watch the clock every 30-60 minutes for potty training. A child is not trained if they themselves cannot tell you they have to go.

Having said that, I have a little one here who is doing fantastic at home with potty training but has NEVER once said she needed to use it here, so she must continue to come in diapers or pull ups until she does. She refuses to even try to use the potty here yet at home will run to the potty when she has to go...frustrating, but normal!

I've never used the plastic pants, so not sure I can comment on that...but...I refuse to be cleaning up urine or poop off my floors, couches etc. so if there is a chance it can 'escape' the plastic pants they wouldn't be allowed to wear them...just my opinion!

I don't force them to learn to potty train. They are ready when they are ready. I encourage them to use the potty, remind them of our sticker incentive for using the potty ( I don't give candy treats for potty) and ask them here and there if they would like to use the potty. I would NEVER let a child go naked at daycare for any reason, ewwwww! lol

[ECE53]

I feel Mom's sense of urgency and he is almost 3 .....I just trained 3 of my little ones and have no one in diapers right now! I encourage the use of the really absorbent training underwear (zellers and Walmart sell them) they are very thick and if a child pees you don't end up with a puddle. I use diapers or pull ups for nap .... But when they are getting reliable through nap I put a change mat under their cot for naptime. As far as running to the bathroom....if they can't manage on their own get a potty that you can have him use at regular intervals ( this method works to change the habit of wetting in their pants for the first few days then you can eventually get to them to go on their own), you can use wipes and hand sanitizer etc .....

[Crayola kiddies]

I agree with Michelle I don't allow naked children or underwear until the child is fully trained for a month and a child that is placed on the potty every hour is not a trained child it's a trained adult. I have it right in my contract that a parents must provide pull ups and they have to be dressed in pants that are easy to manipulate ... No onesies, overalls, belts, buckles ect .... Basically pants or shorts that just pull up and down. I have never used plastic pants but I am pretty sure they will leak urine. I too used a sticker incentive. Maybe buy a potty you can put in your playroom so that you don't have to go up the stairs to use the washroom. At home the parent only has to worry about and focus on one child but at daycare that just isn't so and if the child isn't able to or won't announce that he has to use the potty then it's kind of hard to force them too and to just stop everything you are doing and put them on the potty really isn't teaching them anything. Maybe suggest they work on it during summer holidays when they can have two weeks of consistency. I just potty trained my youngest and I spent a week talking to him about it ... How we were only going to wear diapers for nap/night time then I started on a sat morning he had a few accidents the first day then only one the second day and since then (Jan) no accidents. He still wears diapers for sleeping. So maybe if they wait a few more months it will click for him then it will only take a few days. I trained my three youngest when they were 2.5 and it only took one weekend. Good luck and I would insist on pull ups.

[Dreamalittledream]

Fortunately, as I only care for teacher's children ( works great as my husband is a teacher too), this Mom will have all of June & July to work on it too. I do currently have a potty chair in my playroom; but this little boy refuses to sit/stay or use it. I like the pull up idea & will insist on that...like that once they a dry for a month then underwear. I definitely have to add this to my handbook...revision # 137 ;) Thanks ladies:)

[Crayola kiddies]

I wouldn't stress about it then and make then the next six weeks unbearable trying to force a kid that doesn't want to sit on your potty ...... Gee im sure in two months she can figure it out.

[Inspired by Reggio]

I wouldn't stress about it then and make then the next six weeks unbearable trying to force a kid that doesn't want to sit on your potty ...... Gee im sure in two months she can figure it out.

Yup - this would be my approach as well..... 8 weeks on one on one time with mama is LOTS of time to get her ready for school!

Personally I do not introduce 'underwear' in the training or potty learning process until the child is able to stay dry for 1.5 - 2 hours in a diaper/pull up, is able to tell me they have to GO to the potty and is MOTIVATED to go willingly ... and when we start underwear they still have to wear a containment unit over top of the underwear (plastic pant or pull up) for 2 weeks accident free both at home and in program ... they wear a diaper or pull up to nap time until they consistently wake up dry from nap time and than like someone else mentioned I put a mat under their cot for a few weeks 'just in case' after we move to underwear all day.

I think ever provider WANTS all their kids trained - it sure does make life EASIER to not have to clean up poopy diapers all day long ... however I personally do not want to be tied to a toilet all day long either nor do I want children peeing all over my home in order to 'get there faster' cause a kid is not truly READY to train and we are pushing him - hence the accidents and stress! .

IMO the difference between allowing a child to run around naked at HOME, to put your own kid on the potty every 20 minutes AT HOME or any of the other wonky things people do to try to train quicker is that at HOME you've only got one kid and training is something you do ONCE with that kid so it is not a 'way of life' for you .... as a childcare provider we have 5, 6, 8 children depending on our jurisdiction and there is ALWAYS someone who is training - training is a way of LIFE for us - so we need strategies and plans for this that work for the WHOLE GROUP and cause the least amount of stress to our way of life ... it is not sanitary to have naked children peeing or pooing on our furniture, it is not realistic to expect us to be in the bathroom every 20 minutes putting a kid on the potty and so forth.... it is not the provider is being 'lazy or supportive' in not being willing to do these things it is that these things do not WORK in our DAYCARE LIFE ... training is one of those things were as providers WE have to put a policy for training in place that works for the group and your environment and others have to 'fit into' that or keep looking for a provider who has a policy similar to yours - those rare providers who do not care if a child runs around their home naked peeing and pooping on their furniture or floors - but is sure is not me ;)