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View Full Version : Will it never end with this woman? UGH!



Toregone
07-15-2012, 10:32 PM
So the saga continues with the DCM I turned down for care. She had set up an interview with my partner dayhome but once my partner S knew it was the woman I turned down she was going to cancel it. She forgot to cancel so the DCM showed up at her house. S told her that as she has a business relationship with me she thought it would be a conflict of interest, sorry her time had been wasted but it's not going to work out.

Well DCM flipped out at her! Insulted both S and her home. So S said you know you're confirming a few things that M (me) said please leave. DCM's husband was egging her on at this point so a few more insults and rude comments were made and then she left.

But then she called me. Yelled at me about "spreading rumors and telling lies" (which I hadn't. I simply told S that DCM had spent close to 10 minutes telling me off the last time we spoke). I tried to speak over her and say that as we don't have a working relationship please do not call me again. When she finally heard me she informed me that she would be "calling the proper authorities so I can get what's coming to me". WTH? How did I end up with this crazy woman?

She seems vindictive enough to call CPS with some sort of claim, so I'm half expecting a visit or some sort of contact from Child Services. I don't have anything to worry about of course. I keep the house neat and tidy, anything unsafe is kept well away from children. I feed them well and provide lots of space for play... basically I follow the rules for registered dayhomes even though I'm not registered. But even still I don't want them to be called even if it is false. I've been racking my brain trying to think of what other authority she could contact. I can't think of anything she could say to the police and as I'm private I don't have an agency for her to report anything to. The only thing I can think of is Child Services. I've been stressing all weekend about this!

Any advice on how to deal with this could be greatly appreciated!

Inspired by Reggio
07-16-2012, 06:20 AM
My guess it was an empty threat designed to do just what it has done ~ have you stressing and worrying about what she 'might do' ... she sounds like a 'bully type' personality!

I personally would 'document' all your interactions with her, the fact that you had not contract to provide anything other than temporary care for the summer with a 'maybe' about the Fall, her threats and so forth and get your back up provider to do the same so that IF she actually sends anyone after you or your peer that you both have your side documented ~ from what you've shared you have done nothing wrong and only shared the truth with your back up daycare provider to be careful that when faced with a 'no' the client has a temper which she showed herself. If she continues to harass you or your business I would send her a professional cease and desist letter or that YOU would have to contact the police and report her for harassment ~ you are not obligated to provide service to anyone who is not a match in your home, you provided her ample notice to find alternative service you've done nothing unprofessional or wrong here!

In the future my advice when dealing with this type of people is do not let them 'engage' you in arguing ~ just calmly and politely ask them to leave your home and business rather than getting into a shouting match or what not and if they do not YOU calmly and quietly call the police to have them escorted out of your home so that what is heard from the police side is all THEM loosing control and so forth while you remain professional and calm ~ if they choose to start calling CPS and so forth trying to make your life miserable than there is that clear 'pattern' of anger management issues on file with the police!

Dreamalittledream
07-16-2012, 07:30 AM
Oh so sorry this happened to you. It's impossible not to let things bug you...as much as I wish for the opportunity to just turn my brain off sometimes. I too think she was just blowing smoke. Hopefully you can get some peace of mind in that there's nothing really you can do at this point anyway, except worry and fret uselessly...what will come will come (if anything) & you are well equipped to handle it. Best of luck! We're all cheering you on:)

daycaremom9
07-19-2012, 03:25 PM
Wow, I wonder if she is related to the client that I just had to deal with. The first heated exchange we had was over the phone. She was trying to get me to say something that she could use against me but I kept it on a professional level, didn't raise my voice or name call (as she did).
She felt the need the other day to send me an email asking for her deposit back which I had already mailed to her. She sent me a long drawn out email basically berating me. She was my client for 2 years and the whole time I had to walk on eggshells. I'll be glad never to have to deal with her again! Oh yeah, and of course she had to threaten with calling licensing which she has yet to do because she knows there is nothing she has to report. I have 2 years of communication books that I have recorded everything.
So I would also say just to keep it on a professional level even if she tries to take it to a personal level. Keep strong and if she keeps harrassing you, call the police.

Junelouise
07-20-2012, 07:29 AM
Have your lawyer send her a cease and desist letter or she will be sued for defamation of character. You have witnesses in the other daycare people who have called you about her.
If she calls you again, hang up! It takes two to tango..as the saying goes.
Good luck to her finding new daycare.