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Tyana
08-07-2012, 05:29 PM
Looking for parents who want to share their experiences with daycare providers -

Tyana

tyana.grundig@cbc.ca

fruitloop
08-07-2012, 06:16 PM
Why do you always report the bad and never the good? It's reporters like this that put us in a bad light :cursing::thumbdown: Here's an idea...why not report on something positive for a change!

Inspired by Reggio
08-07-2012, 06:17 PM
Why only the request for poor or bad experiences ~ does that not end up created a jaded and negative piece that does nothing to help families in the search for quality home childcare?

I have worked in the field for over 20 years in both private and not for profit licensed childcare models as well working in both regulated and unregulated home based models and it grinds my gears to see this constant focus on 'regulation' being the be all and end all of the solution for quality childcare.

The fact is there are 'poor experiences' in ANY service industry including all of the above ~ the model is not what equates the quality of care received but rather the motivation and passion of those offering the service to CHOOSE to follow or exceed the rules for best practice regardless of who is 'watching'.

I have seen poor quality care offered in 'regulated settings' where parents sit clueless to what is REALLY going on once they drive way because they blindly assume 'regulated = quality' and do not really 'observe' the program and I know many home childcare providers who work in a 'unregulated' setting who choose to SELF REGULATE above and beyond any 'government regulation' because they are passionate about their role in young children's lives and giving them the best start in life!

I am sure there are MORE people who have an awesome experience in childcare that goes above and beyond any 'minimum standards / regulations' that the governments put forth .... why not seek out them so they could share experiences about those childcare professionals in our communities who are doing GOOD in the world ... why does the media not want to do educational and informative stories on THESE families experiences and perhaps investigate and see what they did differently in their childcare search to find those 'gems' in the industry ... that is likely to help ensure that other families can have a positive experience too!

The Internet is full of horror stories on childcare as well as resources on what NOT to look for childcare settings and providers .... so how about focusing on empowering new parents on what they SHOULD be looking for in a quality early learning with positive experiences that empower them to make an educated choice!

The world is no different than raising children ~ if you want to truly change behavior you need to focus on what you WANT them to be doing verses what you do not want them doing .... if we want to illicit positive change in the world we need to stop making our focus be on the 'negative' of what is WRONG with the world and feeding that negative energy and shift our focus on what is RIGHT in the world and feeding that positive energy instead so that we encourage people to do GOOD instead!

Momof4
08-07-2012, 09:15 PM
I don't know if she's coming back to read these posts at all, but we know we are a special breed. Those of us who are successful work so hard and such long days and are so dedicated to our business and the children and families in our care. This does make me very angry. Thankfully, my daycare families adore me and appreciate me and know that my days don't end when they pick up their children because I still have to clean my house and prepare for the next day. And I love it! Because I am a responsible self-employed business owner who follows the laws but better yet, I nurture and care and adore the children and can work with fantastic people when we choose each other to raise these wonderful little babies onto the road to becoming wonderful adults.

Fun 88
08-08-2012, 05:30 AM
Unfortunately, the bad news sells

Judy Trickett
08-08-2012, 06:35 AM
I, too, have to ask the same question as the other ladies.....why always the negative slant on home daycare? You know, there are scads of home daycare providers out there in the world and I have had the pleasure to "know" hundreds of them. And I can honestly say that 99% of them are good, honest, hard-working people who want only the best for themselves and the children in their care.

Every one dogs the "mommy wars" about daycare verses stay-at-home-moms and if that isn't bad enough, journalists come along and slant daycare in a negative picture and that just precipitates the angst most moms already feel when leaving their child in the care of a stranger so they can go to work and earn a living. WHY do that to someone? I don't understand why a woman would want to do that to another woman.

Why not report on the POSITIVES of home daycare? You know, those daycare providers doing a great job and how the kids in their care flourish and are helped to become good, honest people, just like their caretakers.

Tyana, if you REALLY wanted to report in the best interest of children everywhere, you would report the GOOD and POSITIVE aspects of home daycare. WHY? Because this gets government attention. We are currently in a true daycare crisis and the people picking up the slack for the conundrum the government has gotten us all in to is HOME DAYCARE PROVIDERS. Tell THAT story! There are currently not enough great, quality daycares out there to service all the children who need them. With positive news about home daycare the government would be more apt (through pressure from those who see your news reports) to see home daycare as valuable. And once that happens there might be hope to fix this mess they have created. Home daycare provider numbers could be increased to perhaps take on six children instead of the current five (in Ontario, at least), or allow more home daycare providers to become licensed (if that is what they desire) without having to be affiliated with an agency that takes a cut of their pay. Licensed home daycare means more options for families on subsidy etc.

Report on the good - make a DIFFERENCE. :yes: Do it for the children.

treeholm
08-08-2012, 07:26 AM
There are so many excellent points in the posts above. Have any of you considered emailing the reporter directly with your thoughts? She has left her contact information, but we don't know if she is actually checking this site again.

Judy Trickett
08-08-2012, 07:34 AM
There are so many excellent points in the posts above. Have any of you considered emailing the reporter directly with your thoughts? She has left her contact information, but we don't know if she is actually checking this site again.

My guess is that she will be back. There was another CBC journalist on here about three weeks ago PMing members with the same request. I personally had a PM asking me about "illegal daycare" and if I would like to speak on that point to a journalist. Now, I see it is all negative, negative, negative. I am VERY wary of working with any reporter who might twist and turn words to suit the agenda of their piece.

I can just see it now.....it will be a half hour report on how awful and unsafe home daycare is with a small, 30 second snippet that say, "of course, there are great home daycares out there and it is the parent's job to seek them out".

:thumbdown:

giraffe
08-08-2012, 01:02 PM
I'm just wondering if the OP has a pole or question posted about centre run dc's somewhere else?? Why are you focusing on hdc's only? Please be sure to understand each provinces rules and regulations before you write your article and please visit a few aswell to hopefully get the "real" picture of hdc.

Janet
08-08-2012, 01:17 PM
Tyana,

What purpose is your article going to serve? Do you have an agenda behind writing an article about bad child care experiences with home child care providers? I'm just trying to understand why you'd be interested in writing an article that has already been written so many times in the past.

Yes, there are some really terrible providers out there. Yes, there are plenty of parents who have had awful experiences with home child care providers. I'm not going to argue that point with you because I know that bad providers are a reality. That's nothing new. Why would you choose to cover the same ground that so many other writers have already covered when you could do something remarkable instead?

Why not write an article about good providers and positive daycare environments? I think that could really change the way that parents feel about going to work and having their children in daycare. I'm sure that there are parents of children in home daycare environments out there who would be more than happy to share their experiences for an article. It would be a refreshing change to see a positive portrayal of home daycare providers, really. There are just so many negative stories that are reported but I don't think that I have ever seen anything positive be reported. The image of the home daycare provider gets distorted and as a result, sometimes we all get lumped into the same category. Again, I'm not saying that there aren't bad providers out there, I just think that it's important to make sure that it's known that there are remarkable providers, too.

I'd like to challenge you to take a different path with your article! I think that you could do something memorable if you're willing to not take the beaten path. Everyone writes about the negative aspects and all that accomplishes is putting fear into the hearts of parents. What if you could do something to replace some of that fear with a sense of security for families? If you're willing to do something bold like that, I'd be willing to give you an interview and ask the parents of the children that I care for and the parents of children that have aged out of daycare here if they would be willing to give you an interview. We aren't all the same and I think that it's time that the generalizations about home care providers are challenged.

Inspired by Reggio
08-08-2012, 01:36 PM
Unfortunately, the bad news sells

Only because we LET it :(

Sandbox Sally
08-08-2012, 01:51 PM
All it does is scare poor frightened first time moms to the point where they're nervous wrecks ever leaving their babies with us...not good for anyone. It's not like people don't already know the potential for The Very Bad Things. It's shoved down our throats from the media on a regular basis.

I am so sad for Canadian journalism that it's becoming so very sensationalist and tabloidy. I remember a decade ago, being shocked at how crazy the American television station news reports were. My husband and I talked about how the opening credits were like Inside Edition or some entertainment rag "newscast". Our casts used to be so classy and informative. Now I wonder how much is real and how much is scare tactic to get people to watch. :no:

I agree with what Janet says above,

"I'd like to challenge you to take a different path with your article! I think that you could do something memorable if you're willing to not take the beaten path."

The road less taken will always garner your journalism more attention than sensationalist bullcrap.

mumstheword
08-08-2012, 02:28 PM
I am also wondering what positive is to come from a show about the negatives of home day care?
I have been running a HDC for 15+ years. I have come across many, many other providers. Most of whom are terrific caring, loving women. A select few who are not my idea of good or even fit providers. Why is it we always hear about the bad and never about the good. I would be happy to pass your contact information on to the parents of the children I have cared for over the past 15 years, if you would like to hear how awesome their experiences have been.

mumstheword
08-08-2012, 02:40 PM
Sorry one more thing, Why would a parent contact you with a concern rather than the provider, the police or CAS?
I have heard parents complain about their provider (not knowing I was a provider). For example one woman told me that her provider only served her children mayonnaise sandwiches and went on about what a horrible woman she was. After listening to her complain about her provider (in front of her children no less, which only encourages their disrespect of the provider), I asked her why in the world she was sending her children to someone that she was so concerned about. And if she had confronted the DCP about her worries and why she was talking about this woman in front of her kids? She said she didn't have time to find a new provider and no she didn't talk to the provider about her concerns. (so in reality she has no idea what the provider is feeding her kids, she is taking her kids word for it.) If I believed everything the daycare kids told me...
I listened to a neighbour tell me that her provider left the kids in the highchairs all day and yet she left her daughter there for 6 months knowing this?
I had a previous client talk about me and tell LIES about me and my daycare to other parents etc. Luckily everyone in the neighbourhood knew me and knew they were lies, but what if they didn't? This previous client had a grudge against me because #1 I raised my rates and #2 I wouldn't work late for her when her shift was changed. She had to find a new sitter and was upset with me. Funny enough 6 months later when her shift was changed and her kids hated the new provider, she called me to see if I would take them back.
SO, even if you do hear horror stories from parents, I hope you do your homework and hear both sides of the story.
Sometimes a parent idea of what they want and the reality of what they get don't match and they are disappointed, don't mistake disappointment, guilt and misunderstandings for legitimate experience.

country girl
08-09-2012, 01:54 PM
http://www.ottawacitizen.co m/life/Urgent+need+more+chi ld+care+spaces+acros s+city/7054664/story.html

This link was posted on another site - I suggest Tyana do a feel good story on home daycare providers instead of bashing them and have it coincide with this ottawa citizen story....Maybe then all of the children mentioned in this story that currently don't have care can find loving, caring and thoughful placements in a home daycare with ladies such as yourselves.

Cadillac
08-09-2012, 02:05 PM
I emailed her the following

It would be wonderful to report on how good this care setting can be. . . . . OR . . . if it must be bad new; Why not ask the providers on that forum for their bad experience with parents. What a great story you could make on how badly parents treat the people who care for their children on a daily basis.

just a thought

Tyana
08-13-2012, 09:44 AM
I concur - this is indeed part of the problem - " The number of children waiting to get into a licensed child care centre exceeds the number of spaces available by more than 70 per cent in a dozen Ottawa wards."




http://www.ottawacitizen.co m/life/Urgent+need+more+chi ld+care+spaces+acros s+city/7054664/story.html

This link was posted on another site - I suggest Tyana do a feel good story on home daycare providers instead of bashing them and have it coincide with this ottawa citizen story....Maybe then all of the children mentioned in this story that currently don't have care can find loving, caring and thoughful placements in a home daycare with ladies such as yourselves.

Tyana
08-13-2012, 09:49 AM
I do hope we are trying for more than this! I'd like to hear from daycare providers as to their concerns - eg, around licensing difficulties, etc, as well as other issues from the people on the frontline.



My guess is that she will be back. There was another CBC journalist on here about three weeks ago PMing members with the same request. I personally had a PM asking me about "illegal daycare" and if I would like to speak on that point to a journalist. Now, I see it is all negative, negative, negative. I am VERY wary of working with any reporter who might twist and turn words to suit the agenda of their piece.

I can just see it now.....it will be a half hour report on how awful and unsafe home daycare is with a small, 30 second snippet that say, "of course, there are great home daycares out there and it is the parent's job to seek them out".

:thumbdown:

Play and Learn
08-13-2012, 10:06 AM
One of the things we ARE looking at is daycare providers who actually WOULD like to become licensed ....and find that the hopes they have to jump through are too restrictive. We've heard that perfectly great daycares have had their licenses taken away from them for not having "yard space" - despite the fact that the daycare was directly across from a park that the children visited every day.

IF you're doing your research correctly, then you would know that the DNA (Day Nurseries Act - in Ontario) has rules and regulations in place for licensed daycares. They are there for a reason, and have been for awhile, and licensed daycares should KNOW this prior to opening. If they don't then tough luck for them.

ladyjbug
08-13-2012, 11:25 AM
Tyana, am I to understand that you have completely changed your article now? Or are you still looking for parents to bash home daycare? Your later posts indicate that you really care what we think but the questions you are asking do not coincide with your original post, nor to I see them being linked in any way, shape or form unless our words would be twisted. So, please clarify. I am a parent of two, a private home daycare provider, a person who has worked in a licensed childcare centre during college, and a person that worked with an accredited agency up until my brief maternity leave with my second child. They asked me to come back, but I declined for several reasons. I have a wealth of experience in many different types of childcare and a lot of opinions on how the current system could be improved and open up more spaces, but I need to know exactly what your motive is for writing this article. Our vocation is already looked on so poorly and we provide such an essential service. I do not want another article that is a step backward for all the hardworking women (and men) like me.

Bugaboo
08-13-2012, 11:34 AM
Tyana,

As Janet stated earlier you have a brilliant story right in front of you and its one that (too my knowledge) has never been done before. Why don't you interview a hand full of providers and ask them how the average parent treats them. Unfortunately all too many parents treat their providers with a complete and utter lack of disrespect. Not only do they do things like pay late (or not at all), they also can be rude, condescending, and hateful to the very woman who takes care of their child 40-50 hours a week. Ask yourself how a parent can be that resentful towards their child's caregiver and yet still send them there every day of the week for sometimes 10 hour days? You should also go to www.justthebabysitte r.com and read Judy Trickett's July 2012 blog entry "What Your DayCare Provider is Really Saying". You may find it very eye opening into the everyday life of a Day Care Provider. Please think about this untold story.

sunnydays
08-13-2012, 11:54 AM
I agree with the others...a story about how us caregivers have stepped up to the plate and are helping to raise the next generation while earning a living and raising our own kids as well. In these tough economic times, many women have turned this as a viable option to allow us to stay home and raise our children the way we think is best while helping other parents get out to work by taking care of their children. It is a win-win for society and this forum is full of evidence of our dedication and hard work when it comes to caring for these children. Just look at some of the posts and you will see us all supporting each other and encouraging each other to be the very best daycare providers possible...the fact that most of us are on here every day looking for new ideas, sharing stories, supporting each other should be enough to tell you that the majority of us really care about the kids and really take pride in what we do. I would love to see that in the news...I have NEVER seen anything about the lives of dedicated home daycare providers in the news. If you want to see things from the child's point of view, why not follow a child or 2 or 3 through their days in an average home daycare? Then you will see the fun, the joy, the laughter, the learning and the love that takes place every day for these children.

Inspired by Reggio
08-13-2012, 01:01 PM
IMO challenges to choosing to be 'licensed' with an agency in Ontario are simple:

Inconsistent rules between not having to count your own children in a 'private' setting and having to count them in a 'licensed agency model' as well as the 'restrictions' around age groupings in the face of full-day JK and SK make it most viable to be private ... there is very little 'benefit' for a provider to be with an agency under the current rules ~ everything an agency 'provides' as support to the provider they can get for FREE in the community through networks, OEYC and so forth so the service is 'redundant' and the rules for 'regulated' care around ratios restrict the already minimal income we are able to make.

The 'safety' rules are common sense things that MOST of us do anyway or should be doing ... and things like a 'fenced yard' for home childcare could easily be changed to read 'daily access to a fenced yard OR a public playground' but the problem is that the DNA is designed and written for CENTRE care and well a lot of it does not apply to HOMES because it is not practical!

The other big issue is that FEES in regulated agency care verses private care has an almost $20/day/child gap where the agency charges more to clients or tax payers via the subsidy system because it 'keeps' that $20 /day/child in revenue to cover the middle man expenses of their organizations to 'regulate' the providers and provide said support ... so clients are paying much more for a service because of the cost of the 'middle man' which does not guarantee any increase in 'quality' cause there are many regulated agency out there who do the 'bare minimum' or only follow the rules when someone is 'watching' them.

The easiest way to get more HOME BASED providers to choose to be regulated would be to do what other provinces do ~ cut out the middle man to help keep the cost of childcare lower by not having so many 'middle man micromanaging but not really ADDING to service ~ license the provider directly similar to how centres are but with a ratio that is 'fair' to mixed age groupings, let the provider charge whatever the market can bare to fee paying clients and choose if they want to take 'subsidized' clients at whatever rate the government pays for that and so forth and educate PARENTS on what to look for in their programs as far as quality care, safety and so forth goes cause they are the ones who are IN the programs day in and day out SEEING the programs in action and have them 'report' to the government if they see concerns or issues with their provider!

giraffe
08-13-2012, 02:43 PM
Am I not mistaken as to think that a private home daycare in Ontario CAN NOT become licenced?? As far as I am aware the agency is licenced not the homedaycare. It is two very different things....

Could someone please help with more info?

Tyana
08-13-2012, 03:38 PM
"Private-home day care agency providers are not licensed directly. Instead, the ministry licenses private-home day care agencies. Licensed private-home day care agencies then contract individual caregivers who use their own homes to look after children. Caregivers are screened, approved and monitored by home visitors. These home visitors work for the home child care agency."
http://www.edu.gov.on.ca/childcare/licensingstandards.h tml



Am I not mistaken as to think that a private home daycare in Ontario CAN NOT become licenced?? As far as I am aware the agency is licenced not the homedaycare. It is two very different things....

Could someone please help with more info?

Momof4
08-13-2012, 03:54 PM
Am I not mistaken as to think that a private home daycare in Ontario CAN NOT become licenced?? As far as I am aware the agency is licenced not the homedaycare. It is two very different things....

Could someone please help with more info?
Giraffe, you can register with an agency and there are several around depending on your city, but then you are not exactly self-employed any more, you have a boss again. I really enjoy being self-employed, choosing the families I feel will fit well into my daycare, making the rules for my contract, my business hours, etc. I also don't want to accept subsidized families into care, which is an option if you are with an agency. But I know a caregiver who had a terrible time collecting through Ontario Works when she had a subsidized family with her. It's a whole new can of worms!

Inspired by Reggio
08-13-2012, 03:58 PM
Am I not mistaken as to think that a private home daycare in Ontario CAN NOT become licenced?? As far as I am aware the agency is licenced not the homedaycare. It is two very different things....

Could someone please help with more info?

Ya you are not mistaken .... this is the way it currently is .... in my post I was making a 'suggestion' on how they could IMPROVE the odds of unregulated private home childcare providers wanting to become 'regulated' .... IMO the biggest obstacle is that most of us do not want to loose such a large portion of our income to a 'middle man' that we feel offers very little 'added benefit' to ourselves or clients and the 'benefit' of more regulated childcare is that the government will not allow parents to choose 'unregulated care' if they required government subsidy .... this would allow more CHOICE for parents while still allowing self employed providers the autonomy of running their program 'within the guidelines' but without a direct 'supervisor' coming into their program and micromanaging them monthly ;)

I am not saying get rid of 'agencies' per say because some providers do like the role they play ~ just saying for those of us who do not 'want nor need' the support of something like that the option of being licensed 'directly' might appeal to them!

giraffe
08-14-2012, 10:27 AM
What I was referring to was OPs comment on how we (or some of us) choose NOT to be licenced... I cannot become licenced even if I wanted to... so therefore in Ontario it is NOT an OPTION for me so the article is mute.

Sandbox Sally
08-14-2012, 10:44 AM
I would gladly become licenced, but I am unable to sign with an agency, as that would leave me with next to nothing for take home pay, after the agency skims their fees off the top of MY wages for the services I provide.

An agency, IMO, does nothing for me that I cannot do myself. We as home daycare providers are caught between a rock and a hard place, as we are not willing to pay an entity to do everything that we can do on our own, but we are not physically able to become licensed on our own. THEN, we are vilified by the media, because, of course, unlicensed daycare is, y'know, really really dangerous.

Inspired by Reggio
08-14-2012, 12:04 PM
What I was referring to was OPs comment on how we (or some of us) choose NOT to be licenced... I cannot become licenced even if I wanted to... so therefore in Ontario it is NOT an OPTION for me so the article is mute.

True ~ this is part of the challenge with 'patchwork childcare system' that across CANADA the rules are vastly different province to province on what is legal or not legal and how childcare is managed and addressed .... the OP did not specify which PROVINCE they are focusing on and CBC broadcasts across all the Provinces .... some provinces are lucky and it is the HOME that is licensed there is no 'agency' middleman driving up the cost of care.

Inspired by Reggio
08-17-2012, 12:44 PM
First off, Tanya is not visiting this site again - that's for sure. Secondly, why didn't anyone report her post to have it removed? I just did - right up there with "best thing I ever did" category...

Why would we report her ~ she was not doing anything 'wrong' as this is a public forum her request was not spam or hate speech or any other 'category' for reporting?

BTW she has come back several times since posting her initial question to provide follow up as well as to discuss things with some members via email around the challenges of 'licensing / regulation' and what those 'against' regulation would want to see changed in order to be more inclined to BE regulated so that there are more options and choice for parents who need childcare?

Yes ~ the CBC desire to do a piece on Modernizing Childcare In Ontario and across Canada is politically driven for sure and there are definitely many different beliefs on what that should look like and what is BEST for children and families ... however if WE, either as society at large, as parents or as individual providers, do not stand up and voice our opinions about what WE think is best for childcare industry from the view of the front line than we are going to end up having to live with the decisions of big business and politicians who often have NO CLUE what it is like on the front line acting trying to 'follow' the regulations and how often the 'regulations' rather than encouraging quality childcare often impede them or contradict 'quality' and they will continue to make decisions based on 'economics' and 'getting re-elected' .... change is coming whether we like it or not and if we do not speak up and give feedback on how WE want that change to look when change arrives and it is not what we would have 'wanted' well we got no one to blame cause they cannot 'read your minds' so to speak ;)

An example of when 'regulation' goes wrong ~ when I chose to do home childcare I started out with a licensed childcare agency not because I needed the support they offered but because I wanted to be able to offer clients who needed it the option of 'subsidy' even though it would mean a slight 'decrease' in pay for me to do so ~ an act of 'altruism' because I believe children deserve a high quality program regardless of their parents ability to pay full market fees for said program.

However after two years I ended up never having any clients referred through the agency because of the long waiting list of subsidy and my ability to find clients privately ~ but that entire time I was full with private clients I still followed all the rules and the agency still came out and 'inspected' me monthly and so forth in case a space opened and they had a referral for me. Than going into my 3rd year of business I had a child graduate into 'big school' and was looking to fill a space with a 'over 3' child because I was still at my max of 3 under 3 years of age ... I found a perfect match for hours of care, philosophy, little girl was a perfect addition to the program personality and learning style wise and it was a client who needed care to start ASAP because mom had gotten offered a job she could not turn down and mom wanted the little girl to have some time in a program to prepare for school the next year .... down fall being that the child did not turn three for another 21 days ~ a whopping 15 days of 'childcare attendance' where she would technically be 'under 3' and put me over my restriction of no more than 3 under 3 .... so I called the agency for advice and with the regulations rules I would have to either delay the start date of the client forcing the family to find 'back up care for 3 weeks and have the child go through TWO transitions while mom return to work OR I would have to pass up the client entirely if they could not do that in order to maintain my 'contract' with the agency OR I would have to give up my contract with them I I chose to go with enrolling her at the early start date cause it would be in contradiction of 'regulation' and they could not have a provider who is not in compliance .... seriously how much 'easier' is that child going to be able to care for in 15 days that the other children in my program were at 'risk' if I chose to take her on? But is is STUPID like this that impede providers desires to be 'regulated' and limit the availability of subsidized spots for parents who need access to it ~ cause for the sake of 15 days they lost an amazing and talented provider because for ME turning away a perfectly awesome client over 15 days was just well stupid specially since being 'regulated' did nothing to benefit ME as a business owner and was something I did purely to help CLIENTS and in this case it was not helping them but rather impeding their ability to procure a quality childcare choice for their child ;)

saqi
10-05-2012, 09:59 AM
Hi Tanya,
Can I please get your email address

saqi
10-05-2012, 10:03 AM
Hi tayna,
I have something to tell you, I had a terrible experience with home base daycare. Can you please provide me your email address so that I can send you my story.

country girl
10-05-2012, 10:30 AM
Hi tayna,
I have something to tell you, I had a terrible experience with home base daycare. Can you please provide me your email address so that I can send you my story.

Saqi - perhaps if you had an issue with a home based daycare, the best course of action would be to report it to the proper authorities or to the appropriate provincial government depending on where you are located. I have issues with parents running to the media with their "stories" and possible putting everyone in a certain profession in a bad light.
There was a recent story in my area this past week where a parent reported a problem she had with a school bus driver to the media instead of the bus company or the school???? And now 2 days later they have found her story had no merit??? It irks me that people use the media as their first first point of contact when they have an issue with a profession or person.

angelina
10-16-2012, 03:36 PM
i guess the question was asked in the wrong place? we are definitely a different kind of breed. :)

if anyone tells me home daycare is an easy job, they have no idea why running shoes and track pants is mandatory.

dodge__driver11
10-29-2012, 02:59 PM
Dear OP, I'd be concerned with many of the "daycare providers" that post here. Most seem in it for the money...not many appear to actually care about quality child care or families....they just want to get paid to sit at home. I'm also concerned for the gang of babysitters that hang out at my local park and gab and don;t watch the children they get paid to care for....their dc kids ask ME to push them on swings because they cant get off their lazy butts to play with the kids that, again, they get paid to take care of!! I cannot believe the things I read here. Unbelievable, and glad these women do NOT "watch" my baby!


First of all I can assure you that all the women I have interacted with are VERY caring and professional people, who care for these children with all the resources they have. They all including me take thier child care businesses VERY SERIOUSLY.

We all work very hard..and we come here to VENT. If we did not have the site I am sure some of us would be in a very bad place....We take our connections and friendships here seriously too, and I at least view every one of these women as a resource to go to, and above all my "friends in the biz" no one understands my woes like they do and can.

Lastly...Of course we are in it for the money--who isn't?? You get paid to do a job I am guessing?? (Or you did) Well so do we... and in the end as much as we care for these kids, and assisting them through the most pivital years of thier lives...We have families to support and look after, and we MUST DO what's best for our business.

Until parents and adults understand this WE AS CAREGIVERS WILL NEVER GET THE RESPECT WE DESERVE. and we will always be viewed as they babysitter.

PS: I am hoping I read this wrong and if I did, sorry for that, but it needed to be said.

Crayola kiddies
10-29-2012, 03:17 PM
To darasmommy .... I'm glad I also do not care for your "baby" because you clearly do not value what I do. Because I am the person that provides a safe, caring, and loving place for my daycare children, while their parents are at work, I feed them nutritious home cooked meals, and change their dirty diapers, and kiss their boo boos, I engage them in educational and fun learning activities that I mask as "playing" And at the end if the day they all give me hugs and say see you tomorrow. And by the way .... Yes I am in it for the money because if i wasnt its called volunteering and volunteering doesnt pay the bills....... So thank you for not coming to my daycare and making me terminate you for disrespect ! y
Dear OP, I'd be concerned with many of the "daycare providers" that post here. Most seem in it for the money...not many appear to actually care about quality child care or families....they just want to get paid to sit at home. I'm also concerned for the gang of babysitters that hang out at my local park and gab and don;t watch the children they get paid to care for....their dc kids ask ME to push them on swings because they cant get off their lazy butts to play with the kids that, again, they get paid to take care of!! I cannot believe the things I read here. Unbelievable, and glad these women do NOT "watch" my baby!

Inspired by Reggio
10-29-2012, 04:28 PM
Dear OP, I'd be concerned with many of the "daycare providers" that post here. Most seem in it for the money...not many appear to actually care about quality child care or families....they just want to get paid to sit at home. !!!

Wow ~ I am guessing that you do you OWN a business that needs to be viable in order to allow you to maintain doing it or run in the red cause if you did you would know that EVERY business has to keep an eye on the BOTTOM LINE and ensure that the choices they make in business are reflective of keeping that business viable and ensuring they are not working for FREE?


...I'm also concerned for the gang of babysitters that hang out at my local park and gab and don't watch the children they get paid to care for....their dc kids ask ME to push them on swings because they cant get off their lazy butts to play with the kids that, again, they get paid to take care of!

While I am sure that there are some providers out there who are not 'engaged' with their children and only you know what you are seeing day in and day out at your park ... but I will admit as a professional it frustrates me to see parents/grandparents come to a park and make judgements about what they are seeing when they do not know the provider, the children or their capabilities! So sometimes remember that just because a provider does not get up and put their kid on the swing when they are asking it is because they do not want to get off their 'lazy butt' but because they have a VALID REASON behind not doing it!

So for example my rule at the park is that if you cannot get onto a piece of equipment independently than you are not READY to be on that equipment in the first place and need to choose an alternate exploration and this definitely includes the 'swings' cause they are the most dangerous piece of equipment AT the park! I personally get peeved when some judgmental parent mistakes that safety for 'indifference/laziness' and proceeds to put my daycare kids in a position that they do not have the gross motor skills or cognitive mastery to HANDLE and therefore put them on equipment that could result in a brain injury I would be liable for cause the kid is prone to letting go of the handles and falling off cause they have not mastered the skills needed to grasp swing science. I also have children who are developmentally ready and able to get on the swing independently and PUMP the swing on their own but have been babied by other adults in their life so are stuck in a position of learned helplessness and laziness themselves of why pump if I can whine and someone will push me so I am engaging in tough love by refusing to assist them on or push them because I know they can DO IT if properly motivated and the self esteem and confidence they will achieve when they finally try and succeed is worth it to me to deny them that help momentarily. Lastly I have young children who've spent the entire trip over to the park 'contained' to the stroller or what not and when at the park my goal for them is to be climbing and moving their body on the other equipment and I do not want them sitting idle in a swing ... so if I am not putting them in the swing even though they are 'asking' it is because I have a different GOAL for them in the program!

So my advice to you is it is not your PLACE to be worrying about what other people are doing with their children at the park ... please do not pick them up and put them on the swing or push them as that JOB is the ADULT IN CHARGE OF THEM and if they are not doing it perhaps they have good REASON ... so perhaps next time you are at the park and someone is not placing a child on the swing or pushing them perhaps ASKING before you form a judgement so you can have the FACTS behind someones behavior or choice ;)


...I cannot believe the things I read here...

I know eh? Reading some of the horrible way providers are treated by clients just makes me so sad for them and their need to come on here and vent and ask others for advice ... these are the people who are caring for your children and yet the lack of support and resources they are offered to do that are just abysmal and the fact that a football player gets paid millions to toss a ball around a field and no one blinks an eye and yet we are seen as bitches who are in it for the money for standing up and demanding we are paid fairly for the emotionally and physically demanding job is just disheartening!

dodge__driver11
10-29-2012, 04:43 PM
Originally Posted by darasmommy
...I cannot believe the things I read here...

Reggio:


I know eh? Reading some of the horrible way providers are treated by clients just makes me so sad for them and their need to come on here and vent and ask others for advice ... these are the people who are caring for your children and yet the lack of support and resources they are offered to do that are just abysmal and the fact that a football player gets paid millions to toss a ball around a field and no one blinks an eye and yet we are seen as bitches who are in it for the money for standing up and demanding we are paid fairly for the emotionally and physically demanding job is just disheartening!

I love the spin --hopefully this is what she meant

BrightEyes
10-29-2012, 07:51 PM
Dear OP, I'd be concerned with many of the "daycare providers" that post here. Most seem in it for the money...not many appear to actually care about quality child care or families....they just want to get paid to sit at home. I'm also concerned for the gang of babysitters that hang out at my local park and gab and don;t watch the children they get paid to care for....their dc kids ask ME to push them on swings because they cant get off their lazy butts to play with the kids that, again, they get paid to take care of!! I cannot believe the things I read here. Unbelievable, and glad these women do NOT "watch" my baby!

darasmommy, I would like you to know that I want the best safety, care, and early childhood education possible for my daughter so any child in my care gets the same GREAT quality of safety, care and education as my daughter does!!!! I have come to know many of these women on here through their posts and I know that they do this job for the children, NOT for the money. Seeing that you have a baby, you should know that home daycare providers are definitely NOT in it for the money! The LITTLE that we get paid is barely enough to cover food, art supplies, toys, equipment, insurance, first-aid kit, first-aid training, current up-to-date childcare courses, a roof over the children's heads, heat in the winter, cool air in the summer etc etc etc Part of our income has to be put away to pay taxes, times when we don't have enough children signed on and are in the negatives but yet we still put on a smiling face and make a fun, safe, loving, caring, educational environment for all of the children in our care!

Momof4
10-29-2012, 09:55 PM
Dear OP, I'd be concerned with many of the "daycare providers" that post here. Most seem in it for the money...not many appear to actually care about quality child care or families....they just want to get paid to sit at home. I'm also concerned for the gang of babysitters that hang out at my local park and gab and don;t watch the children they get paid to care for....their dc kids ask ME to push them on swings because they cant get off their lazy butts to play with the kids that, again, they get paid to take care of!! I cannot believe the things I read here. Unbelievable, and glad these women do NOT "watch" my baby!
I am NOT a babysitter and I never SIT!!! I'm much too busy! We are a group of QUALITY CAREGIVERS and very proud of that fact and support and advise each other on this site.

Your words don't bother me at all really because obviously you have only seen bad caregivers. However, my home daycare is amazing and I am an amazing caregiver so I don't have to protest too much about your words. Good luck finding somebody like ME for your child. My daycare families are so happy they found me and love the crafts and field trips and indoor and outdoor fun and the nutritious food and safety and fun I provide that is helping their children blossom and thrive and grow daily.

dodge__driver11
10-29-2012, 10:06 PM
Yes I agree with momof4, good luck finding someone like me....I am proud of myself and my business!!

Bugaboo
10-29-2012, 11:23 PM
As a day home provider and a mother I feel I can see both sides of the issue and let me tell you I'm pretty disgusted also with some of the things said in this thread. First off to Darasmommy- I am truly sorry that you have come in contact with some sub-par providers, as surely that must be the source of your animosity. I'm also sorry that you have such a poor attitude and such little respect for the type of women who help you raise your child. In your post you used the word "watch" but that word is so inappropriate and completely undermines what a good child care provider does. I do not "watch" any of the children in my care rather I am part of the village it takes to RAISE them.

Most providers I know have approximately six kids in their care. I am curious to know why you think a provider "just wants to get paid to sit at home" (your words again)? As a mother you obviously know how busy it is with a child in tow never mind six. How much time do you have to sit around at home? And how would you feel if that is how someone described mothering to you? Make no mistake providing care to children is very much like mothering.

I agree with you completely in regards to sub-par providers. I hate it, but the honest truth is that there are women out there who are not good providers. They are not engaged with their day care children and they do not provide an enriching environment. That being said there are so many wonderful and incredible child care providers. There are several in my community alone that if I had to work outside the home I would gladly send my children to their homes knowing that they would be safe and nurtured. Unfortunately those wonderful providers are often full and have most of their clients for long periods of time. Its hard for new families to get accepted into these day homes. I suspect that you have not been in one of these wonderful day homes based on your obvious disdain. I also know that the reason you have not been in one of these remarkable day homes is due to your attitude. Lets say one of these great providers has an opening. She may interview 4 or 5 families for the spot. 3-4 of those families may indicate their desire to send their child to that provider. This provider than picks the child/family she feels will be the best fit for her and the children already in her day home. With your attitude Darasmommy, I am certain that you would not be chosen no matter how lovely your child may be.

In reference to your experience at the park where you said the providers are there to chat with each other and pay no attention to the kids. This too concerns me. It concerns me that you would go on a forum and bitch about that but yet I doubt you have contacted the authorities. Why would you not report this? If small children are at the park and no one is keeping an eye on them they could be hurt, run over by a car, abducted, etc. I find it very bothersome that another mother would find it suitable to come on here complain about it and yet you have not gone through the proper channels. I realize I am assuming a lot here so if I'm wrong and you have reported this then please correct me.

Lastly you referred to providers as being too "lazy" to push kids on the swings. Well sadly I guess you would call me lazy then because I don't always push the kids on the swings either. If you came across me sitting down maybe you didn't realize that before you arrived I had already been pushing for 15 minutes and perhaps my arms were tired. Or maybe one or more of my day care kids are on the verge of learning to swing by themselves and I am giving them the room to master a new skill that would give both me and the child immense satisfaction.

I hope you will take some of this to heart. If you don't its your precious "baby" that will pay the price. Its your baby that will have to go to a sub-par provider because the wonderful provider refuses to take you on because of your disrespect. What a horrible price for your child to pay.

To the providers on this thread- I know you just want to defend our profession and the great work that most of us do, but to deny that there are some not so great providers out there doesn't do anyone any good. They are out there and it sucks. They are the ones the ruin day home for providers and they are the ones that make mothers terrified to send their children to day home.

Lastly to Saqi- you say you had a terrible experience in a day home. If your experience was abuse or neglect related please do not go to the media. Please PLEASE go to your local authorities. If this provider isn't stopped she could seriously harm a child. If your bad experience was just trivial like you didn't like the provider taking paid vacation, or you didn't like the payment schedule, etc... why don't you talk to the provider, instead of coming on here and assuming that she is unreasonable to the point that it warrants smearing her character and business in the media.

I really don't want to start a big argument between mothers and providers by posting this. Its already been done numerous times on many different forums and frankly I'm tired of it. Its time for providers to admit that bad care givers do exist and its time for mothers to wake up and see the role they play in their child's care arrangement. I would encourage all mom's in those amazing day homes to look at the joy their children have in spending time with their caregiver and all their little friends and to be grateful to the provider for providing that environment and experience for their child. I can't tell you how many times I have been told by my day care kids that after Mommy and Daddy and Grandma and Grandpa they love me 3rd best.

Inspired by Reggio
10-30-2012, 06:28 AM
Well said Bugaboo ~ if as human beings in general we were more proactive of resolving our issues and differences through proper channels or just taking the time to calmly and politely say 'excuse me I am feeling a little concerned about the kids running around the playground here seemingly unsupervised' and allowing the caregiver in charge to respond perhaps we could learn from each other the VALUES behind why they might be allowing that 'freedom' so to speak ;)

What might seem like laziness might actually be carefully planned intent as the morning at HOME may be their structured program time where the adult is very engaged and leading the learning and the PARK might be the place where the children are given their time to explore and learn freely through their play with each other, the children may spend lots of time there day after day and the caregiver, be it parent or provider, may know their skills and abilities in that setting and trust in them to allow them to climb and swing and give them the respect of that freedom to explore without 'hovering' overtime over them because the reality is that more and more research into early years learning and development is showing that children NEED to be given freedom to play freely and NEED to be allowed to take some risks in their play in order to be effective problem solvers and learners later on in life ... so perhaps, just perhaps what you may see as being LAZY is not that all perhaps we may actually have years and years of experience and success at our practice that is confirmed as being BEST PRACTICE by current research that is guiding our values and practice perhaps we truly KNOW what we are doing when we are stepping back a bit and just 'observing' them while allowing children to just PLAY for long periods of the day and saving the 'guided structured interactions' for planting seeds later for the children based on what they need after our observations ;)

Seriously the Ontario government just spent millions of dollars researching, running pilot programs and now slowy unveiling its PLAY BASED / EMERGENT/ CHILD LED KINDERGARTEN programs and retraining teachers to move away from this need to mirco-manage children's days through rigid schedules and constant hovering over them providing them with testing style questions and interrupting their learning with worksheet time and flash cards and reading word tests and so forth because this style of 'education' was steadily turning children off learning and producing children who are moving through the system but 'failing' as learners because all they can do is 'memorize' information they do not retain it or learn how to apply it through hands on engagement .... aka we have spent decades robbing children of a chance to learn to use their BRAINS to figure out how to get up onto a swing of life and make it move on their own verses having a 'teacher/boss/authority figure' constantly lift them up and push them along on the swing of life ;)


.... Its time for providers to admit that bad care givers do exist.....

Oh I think we can all agree that there is good and bad examples in ALL professions for sure ... it is the painting the entire profession with the same brush and snap judgements made without all the facts that tends to get backs up.

I think people reading 'threads' on an online forum also need to remember that this is the 'water cooler' for many home childcare providers who come to blow off steam and gain perspective / advice with others who've walked in their shoes when dealing with adversity or challenges in their programs and as a result of people being comfortable with each other and feeling like they are in a place they can 'relax' a bit they may use less professional and more venting style language and so forth to help blow off that steam that they would never use IN their business itself painting a different picture for onlookers than what they night experience 'in real life' with soeone ... this also needs to be taken in 'context' when just reading threads as a bystander and seeing only 'negativity' cause well human beings rarely come together and ask for advice on 'hey my marriage rocks and my spouse is off the charts awesome ~ wonder what I can be doing to make it better' we seek out advice when we are struggling ;)

And yes as business owners and professionals sometimes we too need to remember this is a VERY public forum on the internet and not a true 'private water cooler' in the safety and privacy of someones home and therefore painting a very public view of how we might be being portrayed and sadly misjudged by outsiders as a result.

LittleWing
10-30-2012, 09:57 AM
Everyone's already said a bunch of what I had to say, just adding, fyi, that I DO NOT PUSH KIDS ON A SWING AT THE PARK...EVER. In my opinion, the park is a place for the kids to PLAY and use their own energy, not for me to plunk them in a seat and push them. My day is INSANE with getting half my group to school and back on time, feeding the other half morning snack and lunch, doing craft, circle time and nap, not to mention changing diapers etc. I do enough during the time we are INSIDE that when i'm at the park the bulk of my work is doing constant head counts and teaching the littles how to make sand castles that "stick", so yeah, I use the park as the limited time I have adult interaction with because that makes me a happier, well balanced human being that won't "snap" on a kid for being a kid. Consider it an essential part of my day that creates an inner harmony and peace so I can be a better provider for the kids in my care. I don't know of a single person that can handle isolation and constant go-go-going without becoming a resentful and sad person.


Dear OP, I'd be concerned with many of the "daycare providers" that post here. Most seem in it for the money...not many appear to actually care about quality child care or families....they just want to get paid to sit at home. I'm also concerned for the gang of babysitters that hang out at my local park and gab and don;t watch the children they get paid to care for....their dc kids ask ME to push them on swings because they cant get off their lazy butts to play with the kids that, again, they get paid to take care of!! I cannot believe the things I read here. Unbelievable, and glad these women do NOT "watch" my baby!

Judy Trickett
10-30-2012, 10:38 AM
Well, you ALL know where I stand with this. I could go on and on and address "darasmommy" but doing so in the fashion likely warranted would get me banned.

All I have to say is......this is exactly why providers feel the need to "hide" on PRIVATE forums because despite our desire to be transparent it seems society still sees us as lazy women who sit at home taking money from parents because we have no other skill set or ambitions.

We have always been held to an unrealistic ideal that we should be different from any other profession - that we should never vent, we should just take what is doled out to us and be happy to have a job.

And then people wonder why there are private daycare forums? Geesh.........

playfelt
10-30-2012, 11:18 AM
Dear OP, I'd be concerned with many of the "daycare providers" that post here. Most seem in it for the money...not many appear to actually care about quality child care or families....they just want to get paid to sit at home. I'm also concerned for the gang of babysitters that hang out at my local park and gab and don;t watch the children they get paid to care for....their dc kids ask ME to push them on swings because they cant get off their lazy butts to play with the kids that, again, they get paid to take care of!! I cannot believe the things I read here. Unbelievable, and glad these women do NOT "watch" my baby!

Another side to this scenerio too: it is demanding parents like this that have no training in childcare or knowledge in childcare trying to tell us how to do our jobs. We don't tell them how to do their work and they shouldn't be telling us how to do ours. Pushing a child - no pun intended - to do an activity that they are not developmentally ready for on their own simply robs them of the valuable learning that they should be doing. Introducing scissors, or alphabet or seatwork before a child is developmentally ready does them a disservice. Running, climbing, playing with sand - all of the other self selected activities at the park are there to teach spatial awareness, cause and effect, etc. and to constantly hover over a child and lead their play robs them of valuable learning. We ARE doing our job when we just sit there and let the kids "play".

country girl
10-30-2012, 12:30 PM
FYI---too busy to read all the comments. I don;t spend all my time here when I should be doing productive things. Like working ;) Have a good one all!

No you just poke your head in from time to time to bitch about people & shit you know nothing about. Hope to hell I never have the "pleasure" of meeting you at the playground....you sound like one of the nightmare parents us "miserable clods" like to bitch about all the time!

Emilys4Guppies
10-30-2012, 12:36 PM
I also don`t push children on swings. When we go to the park, we go to burn energy! We run, dig in the sand, climb the equipment, and play. Sitting in a swing doesn`t help build gross motor skills, and that is one of our biggest goals of attending the park.

Going to the park isn`t part of my job. My job is to provide a safe, loving, engaging environment for the children to spend their days. I do that within my home and yard. Going to the park is a privilege, as are other field trips and perks I like to give the children in my care. :)

Judy Trickett
10-30-2012, 12:42 PM
I think you're all a bunch of unhappy and disgruntled women who have nothing better to do than complain about the children in your care and the parents that pay your incomes. Maybe try looking for another line of work if you're such a bunch of miserable clods. Taking kids to the park while you are getting paid to watch them is part of YOUR JOB. Ergo, pushing kids on swings who are too little to do it themselves IS YOUR JOB.

FYI---too busy to read all the comments. I don;t spend all my time here when I should be doing productive things. Like working ;) Have a good one all!


I feel sad for you. You seem to have so much hatred in your heart for people you have never personally met. It must feel terrible to have so much anger and hatred inside of you that you feel you have to come here and share those sentiments when they do not benefit you in any way.

Unlike us, who might vent about a work problem so we can get it off our chest so as to not let our own "stinking thinking" affect the children in our care, I don't understand the reasoning for your angst other than just bitterness.

If you ever want to talk and need help to identify and clear the reasons you are so unhappy please feel free to contact me directly. And I really mean that. Because every parent out there who thinks the way you do make daycare a more negative experience for everyone - the parent, the provider, and the child. Negativity breeds negativity. And, yes, there is a difference between unadulterated and unreasonable negativity and venting. Venting asks for guidance in an attempt to fix a problem so the venter can move on and be a better person, with a positive attitude to go forth.

I know you *think* your words help. But in reality they just made daycare harder for everyone. Congratulations, you just added to the very negativity and "bitching" that you came here to post about.

If you would like to make YOU feel better try understanding instead of anger and hatred.

Hatred begets hatred. There has never been a moment in time wherein hatred begot love or made anyone change.

Bugaboo
10-30-2012, 12:50 PM
Darasmommy- do read back what you type before you send it or are you normally one of those people who speaks before they think? I am truly scared for your child if she is in care right now. You have just insulted her care giver whom I pray will never read what you wrote. You have just risked the safety of your child and all the other children in her day care arrangement by infuriated, hurting, and insulting her provider. This will effect your child's day. The provider will not be working with her full steam as she will be thinking about your horrible words to describe the very people who raise your child when you go to work. I hope and pray today your provider doesn't snap.

Also, I am not working today therefore children in my care are not affected by what I am doing with my free time. Furthermore check the time posts on several of these posts, several of them are in the afternoon during nap time when the providers are taking a much deserved rest.

sunnydays
10-30-2012, 12:52 PM
I have to say, considering your posts, and your obvious lack of respect for our profession and all the hard work and dedication it takes for us to be the excellent daycare providers I KNOW the majority of us are, I am certainly also VERY glad I am not "watching" your baby! And may I never have someone so lacking in respect set foot though my doors because let me tell you, this is a hard job and an extremely important job that we do. I hope that you don't treat your own daycare provider with such contempt!



Dear OP, I'd be concerned with many of the "daycare providers" that post here. Most seem in it for the money...not many appear to actually care about quality child care or families....they just want to get paid to sit at home. I'm also concerned for the gang of babysitters that hang out at my local park and gab and don;t watch the children they get paid to care for....their dc kids ask ME to push them on swings because they cant get off their lazy butts to play with the kids that, again, they get paid to take care of!! I cannot believe the things I read here. Unbelievable, and glad these women do NOT "watch" my baby!

mimi
10-30-2012, 01:05 PM
Wow, there is medication for what you suffer from darasmommy. I sincerely and strongly suggest you speak to a medical proffessional regarding your anger issues. It is one thing to have a different opinion, it happens all the time on this forum, however the ferocity with which you write your comments is a huge red flag to your troubled state of mind. To come on an "anonymous" forum and spew your character assisinations of the daycare provider community is a bullying and cowardly tactic. Please refrain from visiting here again unless you have something positively productive to say. Good luck to you. :no:

dodge__driver11
10-30-2012, 01:07 PM
Just an FYI--even though I am not letting this "darasmommy" get to me.. I am not your nanny, and I choose who I welcome into my program.

sunnydays
10-30-2012, 01:18 PM
My biggest question is "why is Darasmommy on this forum at all?" I mean, I think it is wonderful that parents take the time to come on here and learn what life is like from a daycare providers perspective to help them understand more and therefore gain more respect for us, but why come on and just start responding to posts in such a hateful manner? Why come on a daycare providers forum at all if she hates us all so much? Why not spend the time with her"more important things" that she mentioned? Does she think she will cause any of us to actually doubt our own self-worth for a second? WE know that what we do most people wouldn't do for a million dollar pay-check let alone the small pay we take home. WE know that we do a fantastic job despite the low pay. WE know we do it because we care and because we love what we do.

dodge__driver11
10-30-2012, 01:40 PM
Yeah...I was miffed before, but honestly...she's looking for a reason to stir shit up, and I am finally in a place where I am gaining confidence in me and my business, so I choose to walk away, but at the same time telling her what I think.

mamabear
10-30-2012, 01:48 PM
I don't post much on here but had to ask a question...everyone who has a job works because they need the money. Why is it then that us providers are always accused of only being in it for the money? Also, why aren't WE allowed to bitch and complain once in awhile? I don't have co workers to chat with on my break so if I choose to vent on an online forum why does that make me unhappy and disgruntled? Everyone else gets to whine about their jobs but when we do it we are supposed to find a new line of work....such an unfair double standard.

Inspired by Reggio
10-30-2012, 02:15 PM
I don't post much on here but had to ask a question...everyone who has a job works because they need the money. Why is it then that us providers are always accused of only being in it for the money? Also, why aren't WE allowed to bitch and complain once in awhile? I don't have co workers to chat with on my break so if I choose to vent on an online forum why does that make me unhappy and disgruntled? Everyone else gets to whine about their jobs but when we do it we are supposed to find a new line of work....such an unfair double standard.

Yup ~ and society wonders why there is a shortage of quality childcare in the province or across Canada for that matter cause honestly if there was ALL THIS MONEY in it for SO LITTLE WORK every bloody entrepreneur looking to make a quick buck would be opening up childcare centres ~ there would be options out the wazoo for parents seeking childcare .... but WHY than such a shortage???


Cause the reality is there is this double standard of expected professionalism, undying dedication to the children above your own needs as a human being, expectation to always have smiles and rainbows coming out your arse all day long despite the emotionally and physically demanding nature of raising children and often with out the support and resources you need to help them thrive cause parents are working 'against' you cause they do not have the full understanding of child development and what children NEED and are parenting based on what is easy in the MOMENT verses the long term investment of skill building to allow children to thrive through all stages of life! And than in addition to all those expectations is the expectation to work 12 plus hours a day for basically less than minimum wage after expenses all without taking a break or going pee or god forbid sitting down at the park for a few minutes in a 12 hour day and just letting kids be 'kids' or coming online on your lunch hour or break and seeking support for a challenging behavior or client you might have without being judged as lazy or shirking your 'job' ....all the while having to listen to parents complain about how 'expense childcare is' when in reality they pay less than $3 an hour for it in most cities but do not think twice about $5 for a latte that takes 3 minutes to make and 10 minutes to drink or will spend $20 to go see a two hour movie or pay $200 for a tattoo .... and than on top of ALL of that you have to deal with unrealistic expectation of parents who want their child to be doing all these activities and formal 'academics' during the day but than get pissy if their kid comes with a bit of paint on their new Ralph Lauren top or the kid gets sick and some how that is 'the providers fault' cause lord knows they could not have picked up that germ at the grocery store or church on Sunday or the one of dozens of extra curricular things kids get carted around to these days ... there is a total lack of VALUE about what is done in the early years and very little resources and support given to the childcare industry in general but specifically lacking is home childcare and when we try to create our own support network and access to resources and ideas sharing with peers we get blasted for that as well .... so no surprise it is the quickest industry to burn out and the hardest one to have people spend their entire career in and people like Darasmommy who come onto forums with their paint them all with one brush as lazy and incompetent and someone who has obviously never walked a day in the shoes of someone who actually does this job can take a nice deep bow for being the ROOT cause of that shortage of childcare options .... cause people get so very tired ot 'trying' only to have to deal with this constant double standard where you are damned if you do and damned if you do not resulting in unattainable expectations society has for childcare providers and people deciding it is just easy to take a job where you can say 'Do you want fries with that'!

jodaycare
10-30-2012, 03:23 PM
If this person has a daycare provider for her "baby", I feel incredibly sorry for her. I could never work with someone like that and having read what she thinks about home daycare providers I am very grateful for the wonderful parents that I deal with with everyday. What a negative person!!!!

Momof4
11-01-2012, 10:35 PM
Yes, this is a public site. Yes, parents can view what childcare providers post here. I am not ashamed to admit that I'm completely honest on this site. I want to help other new home childcare providers to learn what I learned the hard way with parents who made me angry and treated me badly. I want to help them with things I've learned about caring for other people's children as opposed to raising my own children. There is a big difference. I want to let them know that a contract and rules and regulations are important for us.

However, I don't know if you darasmommy are a person who had a horrible experience with a 'babysitter' as you claim or if you are a 15 year old idiot or a 75 year old senile person, but you came on this website and posted very arrogant, abusive, disgusting posts against us and that is just wrong and uncool and not called for!!! I will not be responding to you any more and I suggest you be banned from this site.

Inspired by Reggio
11-02-2012, 07:27 AM
Seriously Darasmommy you need to stop and ask yourself why are you so bitter and angry towards ALL home childcare providers ... if your sentiments were TRUE and this was such an easy job to do and so much money in it than WHY is there such a shortage of quality childcare options for clients? Why doesn’t every city have an abundance of people lining up to be a home childcare provider? Why isn’t every corporate business opening up a childcare program in their establishments for their employees? My guess is that you know VERY LITTLE about what it truly takes to help raise OTHER people’s children and what a day in the life of a child care provider truly entails!


You all should reconsider what you post here. It truly is disgusting.

I do not think that many of the ladies on here need to ‘reconsider’ what they post about as we are fully aware it is disgusting the things they have to post about ... it breaks my heart day after day to read about professional business women having to vent because once again they are dealing with ...


Clients who signed a contract of agreement for service and then decided that they do not need to abide by that agree because well they did not really bother to ‘read it’ assuming after all we are just ‘babysitters’ and are not to be taken seriously and when the provider stands up and states ‘you signed agreement’ the client gets their knickers in a knot and pulls for care without notice leaving the provider either without income or having to take the time and energy to sue in small claims court
Clients who think it is acceptable to use a service and then just pay late or not pay for it all for said service but when the provider stands up and says ‘hey this is not acceptable’ than they get called a money grubbing bitch who is just in this for the money
Clients who medicate their children and send them to program without the respect or consideration of informing the provider so that she has the resources in information needed to make informed decisions about how to meet that child’s needs putting their own child at risk while posing a great risk.
Clients whose children are being raised to be aggressive who hit and kick and bite the provider and when the provider seeks assistance and help for curbing and controlling this behavior the clients response is ‘oh no not my little Johnny he’s an angel.
Clients who show up before the business is open or after it has closed and do not think that should have repercussions


Seriously I could go on and on about all the various DISGUSTING things that many providers have to deal with on a daily basis .... once again it is a testament as to WHY there is such a shortage of quality childcare providers in the field because the truth is for many that while we love working with the CHILDREN it is a thankless stressful job because they are constantly having to deal with less than ideal CLIENTS with unrealistic expectations and judgements day after day who burn them out!

Thankfully as an enlightened individual I do not paint ALL clients with that brush and able to realize that while there are indeed ASSHATS in the world that there are also amazing clients out there too and I hold out doing what I do so I can attract them into my program ... I am blessed to work with amazing clients who share my values and respect and appreciate me and I am blessed with that because over my 25 years in the field I have learned how to weed out the SELFISH UNREALSTIC CLEINTS who would do things as listed above as well as in case my radar is ever fooled I have learned to put policies and procedures in place to protect myself and my income from someone who would try to take advantage of me ... and I have done that through networking with peers in my field and learning from their experiences they’ve shared through venting and brainstorming ideas ... these ‘disgusting’ stories while disheartening allow providers to learn from them and grow to be better stronger business owners and ensure that there continues to be access to quality childcare experiences ... because without forums and networks to seek out support more and more providers would leave the industry creating greater shortage of childcare!

You want to have a better childcare experience for your daughter instead of coming on here and tearing providers DOWN and causing more of them to think 'yup this is what clients are like and why it is time for me to leave the field' so we loose yet another provider .... how about coming on and giving helpful advice on what, as a parent, you would like in a childcare experience and perhaps we can help you with questions to ask and what to look for when you tour and interview to ensure you get a quality childcare experience!

Cause if you truly READ the threads on this site and got past the 'venting' we have to deal with to take the time to listen to the ADVISE being given you would see that we all share the goal of wanting to make our business thrive to be awesome places for our own children and the others children and sometimes people just need to hear 'yes that was a horrible way you were treated' so they can find the courage to DEAL with the issue and move past it!