Take on family members as daycare clients?

[mommyof2princesses]

Hello! What does everyone think about taking on family members as daycare clients? It's my sister-in-law.

[Inspired by Reggio]

Oh honey only you can answer this cause you know your SIL and your relationship best but IME there is a reason why they say never mix business with pleasure ;)

My advice is that if you DO mix business with pleasure make the rules the SAME for family as for everyone else ~ no special and no blurring of the lines when you are in care its your business hat being worn!

I made this mistake when I opened 5 years ago and it did not end well at all ~ I allowed my nephew to come while my brother was suppose to be looking for work, they claimed they could not afford to pay me until my brother started working but because my nephew was suppose to be in JK and I was homeschooling him he had to come daily in order for him to get exposure he would be if he was in school so he was here full time for 9 months without paying ... in April I found out that they had renovated their entire kitchen despite not being able to 'afford' childcare and my feelings were obviously HURT because I felt taken advantage of ... so in the May my SIL got laid off as well so I told them I could not keep doing this for FREE since they were both home now and could cover each other for any interviews yada yada ... so they pulled him and told me as soon my brother got work she wanted to send him back because she was getting EI and doing some union training and they would need care ... well I found out my brother got work with 4 days of her getting laid off and yet three weeks passed and they did not send him back so permanently I filled the space with someone who had been picking up the days and wanted full time care ... and than 3 weeks after I did that she calls wanting to send him because her training is starting and well I am full now cause I assumed they changed their mind since my brother had been working for 6 weeks and they had not sent him back ~ and she lost it on me and because they had no care she made my brother take sick leave from his new job so she could do her Union training and my brother lost his new job as a result and she blamed ME to everyone in my family ... so needless to say I am still not speaking to my SIL or my brother either cause it just got ugly.

Family and money rarely ends well .... if you do do this make sure they PAY just like everyone else and keep the relationship 'professional'!

[mommyof2princesses]

WOW! Sorry that happened to you Inspired By Reggio :( I am beginning to think its not a good idea to mix family and business as my SIL isn't the easiest to get along with at times. Even though I have a spot to fill I think I will wait for someone that isn't family to fill it.

[Momof4]

I had a very good experience with a family member in my daycare. In fact the reason I opened my daycare in the first place was for my daughter and my grandson and I'm so very grateful that fate dealt me this hand. I only charged my daughter a lower fee, but since this is your SIL I would make them sign the contract and pay your full fees and talk to them honestly before anything is signed that when they are in your home during your business hours it's all business. Make sure they know you will NOT bend rules for them and that they must respect you as a business woman.

My daughter and I have a good relationship so I had no problems whatsoever, but family can be tricky. I just wanted to share a success story with you.

[kidlove]

I take care of family and couldn't imagine not doing it, although some of you may think I am crazy....I give a "super sweet discount as well. (family before money for me). The one thing I do expect is that they follow my rules. I do expect 24 hour notice for sick days and they have to follow my contracts to the full. However....family gets a little leeway, they're family after all. I just couldn't imagine not making space for my niece and nephew...however, I also do not have either of them full time and given the circumstances (lesser pay) my sister and sister in law both understand that the full payers need to have a spot first...they both have flexible schedules so it works out for all. Can't say there hasn't been a little "trouble" from time to time,(with the sis in law, she can be a little difficult) but isn't there always a little trouble in families. We always work it out. It can get a little harry, def think hard before doing it, but it can be done. and sure is nice to develope a bond with your niece/nephew. :)

[Inspired by Reggio]

.... and sure is nice to develope a bond with your niece/nephew. :)

Yes I loved my time with my nephew for sure - I miss that most and am grateful for time we had!

You really have to know your family for sure - mine is disfunctional to say the least!

[cfred]

I have my nephew here and so far it's all been perfect! My sister and her husband have been wonderful clients. NOW....friends as clients is another story.

[kidlove]

totally agree cfred, I can see a friendship getting quite strained from mixing with business. Have to admit though, I dont have any really great friends, they would have to be able to stand the test of time...even then, not sure if the risk would be worth it. Family might be a little dif. Family usually has an "unconditional love clause" :) at the end of the day, no matter what happens....you still love your family! (unless it's too dysfunctional :) reggio):laugh:

[Mamma_Mia]

totally agree cfred, I can see a friendship getting quite strained from mixing with business. Have to admit though, I dont have any really great friends, they would have to be able to stand the test of time...even then, not sure if the risk would be worth it. Family might be a little dif. Family usually has an "unconditional love clause" :) at the end of the day, no matter what happens....you still love your family! (unless it's too dysfunctional :) reggio):laugh:

Ditto...word for word 100%

[cfred]

My friends are awesome too. It was a combination of issues. On the one hand, they were saying "oh, she's a friend....it's okay if we're late picking up, or she'll be okay if we pay her next week". Then I was all wishy washy and not wanting to offend anyone, so I let it go too long. It was rectified in the end. But I found friends were the worst for nickel and diming me! Wanting me to reduce fees for this, that or the other or make exceptions due to friendship. Grrrrr.

But yes, family has the unconditional love thing. It does help that we're a very close family. My sister's my best friend and biggest cheering section. Since we've just moved, I'm working pretty hard to pick up new clients. Bless her....she's picking up women at Starbucks for me :)

[Monday 2 Friday Mama]

At the risk of sounding totally mercenary, I think some of your decision on whether or not to take on your Sister in law's child should be based on whether or not she is paying the same rates as your other clients. Can you afford to offer her a "family discount" ? Don't feel badly if you can't - the profit margins in this industry are not huge. =) The other thing to consider, is if her child is in your care, that's one less monkey that you can provide care for - again, something to think about before you offer her free or reduced rate childcare.

[Naftafia]

I have been caring for my two nephews for over two years now and I love it. It is so amazing to spend so much time with them and be such a big part of their lives. However, it was made clear from the beginning to the parents and the kids (as much as they could understand) that daycare was daycare and being with their aunt was different.
We had a few bumps along the road but i forced myself to address it immediately in the daycare time and it was well received.
The thing I find the most difficult is allowing myself to be the aunt after daycare hours and not get involved with the discipline, the feeding etc.... as it is my roll during the day and I simply want to the be fun loving aunt afterwards.
My advice is simply to be straightforward about your concerns and talk it through with your sister in law. If all goes well and you move forward, make sure to treat them as you would all your clients.
Good luck