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View Full Version : Please don't judge my daycare by the state of my house



mustbenuts
11-01-2012, 12:55 PM
Not sure if this is the right section but I just wanted to put it out there that if you as a parent should pop in to pick up your child a bit early (which isn't really a problem and I understand the need sometimes to come in unexpected, I would do the same) and you see that as the kids are all finishing snack the house looks a mess (toys, crafts, not dirt) and there are dirty dishes in the sink, please realize that instead of cleaning, your provider has been caring for your child. I think we all know as mothers that we cannot do it all and if you give your full attention to a child/ren, then something's got to give.

I had a mom pick up early yesterday and then ask to use the change table. The child must have JUST pooped because I had just changed him but she made it seem like I had missed it. To use the change table she had to come into the house a bit and it was a crazy time of day and she looked a little shocked. The washroom is also my laundry room and, having thought I was done the diaper changes for the day, I had just dumped a pile of laundry on the floor and the room had not yet been cleaned since I do that at the end of the day. Anyway, it could have been tidier and I just got the feeling from the mom that she was shocked/disappointed.

So I just wanted to say to parents of children in daycare that that one snapshot you see of your provider's home may look totally different from the clean, organized house you saw in the interview/tour but please remember what really matters and that is if your child is delivered to you safe, happy, tired from a busy day, and happy to come again. Frankly a pristine house really is not possible with 5 toddlers running around, and you should be a little worried about your provider's priorities if there house is always immaculate.

Play and Learn
11-01-2012, 01:01 PM
^ Especially when you DON'T have a dishwasher and wash dishes by hand!!!!!! That one gets me everytime!

We're human, and like you said, we have other priorities like CARING for YOUR children!

Well said mustbenuts!

kidlove
11-01-2012, 01:14 PM
I think this is part of the reason providers (as well as stay at home Mom's) can get a hassle sometimes by those who JUST DON'T KNOW! (unfortunately my husband falls into that category along with a few of my daycare parents.) Just wish some time I could give the job to the one pointing the finger and see how well they do what we do. Oh man I would love to see them keep under wraps, the cooking, cleaning, scrubbing, washing, tidying.....along with the holding, snuggling, scolding, feeding, changing, wiping, burping, teaching...etc. and have the outcome at the end of the day we mostly have, which is a hot dinner on the table, floors picked up, vacuumed, and washed, laundry done and put away, sink empty, counters clean and kids happy. Even when I worked my job around the house was about 15 times easier, think about it these parents don't have a clue what we deal with on a daily basis. Sure they have to do all the chores before and after work, but while they are at work no one comes into their house and dirties every dish, pees on their floors, takes out every toy, and fills the laundry room with rags filled with spilled milk and feces. Until then, keep your "looks of disappointment" to yourself.

Bookworm
11-01-2012, 01:15 PM
I agree! My front door opens right into my kitchen and there always is something on the counter and dishes in the sink waiting to go in the dishwasher. I feel like the parents must be judging me, although no one has said anything.
Actually, I think my parents are fine with a little bit of mess because they always mention that they don't know how I handle so many young kids at once!

kidlove
11-01-2012, 01:22 PM
My favorite is when a husband comes home and sees everything the way it was when he left in the morning and says to his wife...."what did you do all day, while I was at work?" Around here The house is clean before the first kid gets out of bed and comes through the front door, then? complete and total ruine!!!! for about 10 hours straight.....then? sweat to cleanup and vwala, for a temporary time, the house is back in original shape.....for all those who only saw the beginning state to return again with the big question of "what did you do all day"........oh nothing, ate bon bons and watched soap operas. :blink:

mustbenuts
11-01-2012, 01:23 PM
I think it also bothered me because yesterday was our Halloween party so it was even busier than usual with me trying to give them a special day. And of course the extra crafts and activities create extra mess. I just think parents should be grateful that we do so much with their kids and that all the mess stays HERE so they can go home and enjoy their child knowing they have had a busy, stimulating day. I was horrified that she saw my house like that but really, it is what it is.

Dreamalittledream
11-01-2012, 01:28 PM
I have posted a wall stencil at my entrance "Please excuse the mess, the children are making memories". As well, I have it in my intro letter how having children opened my eyes to so many things that take priority over the house having to always be spotless.

playfelt
11-01-2012, 01:29 PM
A big issue is that many of the daycare moms are first time parents meaning their house is basically used only by two adults who aren't home all day and a baby who is there for a short time. What they have no experience with is what their home will look like after that sweet baby turns 15 months and things dumping, ripping, climbing are all fun things to do.

kidlove
11-01-2012, 01:30 PM
My sister has a plaque that hangs in her dinning room that reads: You missed it I cleaned yesterday! She doesn't mind "clutter". :)

Naftafia
11-01-2012, 01:46 PM
So true! The mess in my house bothers me sometimes, but most of the time I am not bothered by it because as most of you said, I return the kids home happy and well taken care of.
I also love the quote "cleaning a house with children is like brushing your teeth while eating oreos"
lol

kidlove
11-01-2012, 02:00 PM
cute Naftafia :)

mom-in-alberta
11-01-2012, 08:42 PM
Hahaha... I started telling parents during the interview, that THIS, right here.... is the cleanest you will ever see my house! LoL
I tell them that in my opinion, there is a difference between messy and dirty. My house may be messy/cluttered with kidstuff and in all likelihood, there are dishes in the sink or on the counter at any given time. But it's probably because I thought it more important to take the little people outside to play, than to tidy up!!

apples and bananas
11-02-2012, 06:26 AM
What an awful time for a parent to pop in. I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I am very lucky to have an entrance way with doors to the main house so parents come and go into the front hall as they please (around pick up times) and wait to come into the main house... if I even let them in to the main area. My play room is in plain sight but I've blocked half of it with a couch so it doesn't look as messy and I always make sure the eating area is clean so at any given moment when a parent comes in it doesn't look too bad... it's all about staging in this business I think!

Inspired by Reggio
11-02-2012, 06:55 AM
I hear ya ~ it is frustrating when one is judged without all the facts :(

I have the opposite issue ... I myself have clutter / visual chaos issues so my program is one of those ones where everything has a place and most of the toys and mayhem are contained in 'baskets' that match my decor and so forth so it does not look like 'wee kids live here' all the time cause well after hours they 'don't' and as a result new clients often comment 'hard to believe five kids have been here all day its always so neat and tidy ~ I only have one kid and my house always looks like a toy bomb went off' and than I have the worry that people think the kids do not get to have 'fun' cause there is no mess ... so I have to take lots of photos for clients that say yes it does get messy and fun in here during play periods for sure and see here are the photos of the playroom in chaos from their play but at the end of the play period I have the children help to clean up during transitions with the two minute tidy and put the room back together cause that is just how I was trained in all my years of centre care and shared space ~ between transitions the room was tidied up for the next groups enjoyment ... I have learned to ease up being home now and if I know we are coming right back to play on a rainy day or whatever instead of going outside I will let them leave it out but other than that when we 'leave' the playroom it is left in order neat and tidy with everything in its home for next play ... everything is photo labelled on the shelves and the room goes back together like a giant puzzle that they are able to learn to do themselves ~ even my 16 month old already helps with tidy up time.

This way when my day is over I am not spending another hour 'cleaning up' to get my home back cause we've all done it together as a team by the time the last child leaves I am truly done for the day ... after all this is their space too and I personally do not think there is anything wrong with teaching children from an early age how to care for that environment and be a part of helping it be clean and tidy and the self esteem that generates is awesome ... my crew love when its their turn to wash the tables after snack or what not!

Momof4
11-02-2012, 08:29 AM
Too funny ladies, but this is sooooo me too! I don't have a dishwasher so by the end of the day both my sinks are full of dishes. I come in with the stroller wheels covered in wet leaves and the children's boots and splashpants covered in mud and puddle water and my front hallway is so messy. If I get a minute during the afternoon I try to sweep it up before the parents arrive.

But the fact is, the children ate great, nutritious food all day and had a blast playing outside and inside and the paint and craft material is still all over the dining room table when the parents arrive usually which means they have been creating. All of these things mean that the families are attending a great daycare.

I also tell parents at the interview that I keep my house very clean but chaos ensues when we are having fun.

kidlove
11-02-2012, 09:47 AM
I have a little of Reggios issue, I admit. :( I tend to have near panic attacks at times when things are out of place or I can see dirt and food under the table.) (therefor...I spaz-tidy throughout the day) will play a game with the kids for a while, then lead them to free play and sweep the floors or wash a load of dishes. Throughout the day I manage quite well to juggle playing with the children and cleaning. wash dishes about 4 times within the daycare day, get at least 2 loads of laundry done and put away and maintain counters and table tops. Starting at about 3pm just before all kids awake from nap, I will do the final run through, of sweeping, dishes, finishing laundry and putting most toys away or back to my basement (where they are stored every night so we can have our house back:)) I often wonder if parents wonder if we do anything at all through the day. :) Some drop off before we do our daily treck to the basement to have our "pick for the day" what toys each child would like to play with, and by the time most pick up, I have already cleaned and tidied up the mess from the day. I have had parents comment on how organized and tidy my house always is....they say "you'd never know I had a daycare" I do like it that way!!!!! sometimes I wonder though if they wonder if the kids do enough and have enough to play with. I am such a "ordered" person, if you've never been here mid-day, you might think it's always so clean and tidy.

BlueRose
11-02-2012, 10:03 AM
My place is "lived/worked in", so its clean but not so clean I would eat off the floor. When people come over I just say "Please excuse the mess, the children and I are making memories". I live in a small 2 bedroom apartment and run a daycare in it, what do people expect.

I am my own dishwasher, and I don't always work. :laugh: If you don't like the fact I have a few dirty dishes in the sink or clean dishes drying on the counter, please be my guess and clean them for me.

I only do one major clean every week, which I do on the weekends. I do spot cleaning during the week as needed. If people don't like that, they they can pay for a maid to come in twice a week. (that would be nice)

I do clean up the "toy bombs" before bed. my husband is up at 5am and doesn't always turn on the lights. So if I don't want anything broken I make sure its out of his way.

sunnydays
11-02-2012, 01:05 PM
Yes, Ihad a parent look around at the toy mess the other day and say,"I hope you get your older son to hepl you clean up at the end of the day" (meaning my teenaged son)...I just laughed and said "He's a great help, but I don't ask him to clean up the daycare...I get the kids to do that themselves...but sometime we don't clean it up at the end of the day and we leave it for the next day". I like tidyness and a clean house, but I will not kill myself to keep it perfect. At the end of the day I have to rush to give the kids a snack and get to the bus to pick up my son and then back and then pick-ups start which is always a bit chaotic...so we don't always have time and I don't want to do it after work, so then we will doa tidy up in the morning. I am thankful to have a separate daycare space so I can walk away at the end of the day :)

Mamma_Mia
11-02-2012, 01:10 PM
It does make a difference if they are parents of only one or mulit ages.

First time parents I agree for the first 12mos baby doens't dirty much and mom is home so being tidy is easier. Then they go to work and no one is home all day to MAKE a mess.

Parents of multi don't judge and understand more! My Dcmom has a 15yr, 5yr & 3yr...Yesterday I admit the house was a disaster (messy not dirty) and I said "I'm sorry about the chaos" she replies "oh please, it's chaos everyday with us, no worries!"

My mom was/is a clean freak. We never went to the park or did fun stuff because mom has to do the dishes or laundry or beds etc. She to this day will not sit down to eat until the prep-dishes are washed and put away and the sink is clean.

I am NOT like that! Kids come first, mess will be there again in 1hr. Do it later....whatever LOL