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View Full Version : What I have learned from my daycare search....



Marie999
04-29-2011, 12:23 PM
I interviewed A LOT of providers. I thought I would post some advice for those starting on their search as I defiantly learned a few things along the way.

1) Pre-screen and pre-interview
- Sit down with your significant other and create a list of "must haves"
- Check websites, ask for contracts to be emailed to you before the interview and quickly run through your "must haves" on the phone before setting up an interview. Don't waste time in the interview asking questions about things you already know (i.e. policy for sick days, operating hours, etc).

I wasted a lot of time interviewing providers that would have never been a good fit because I didn't take more time with for a quick pre-interview on the phone. I also wasted time in the beginning of my search because I didn't specify pet-free and then found out later my husband was anti-pet in a daycare home (he has trouble trusting other people's dogs).

2) Insist on current references (at least three) and actually check references
- Everyone can come up with three people who will say something nice about them, so make sure their references are relevant and current or very recent families.

My current provider gave me the names and numbers of all the parents whose children were currently in her care, including the family that was leaving and opening up a spot for my son. She also gave me the name and number of two past families who had used her services for five years +. I called all of her references (9 sets of parents total) and they all said very similar things and said she was fantastic (and she is).

3) IMHO is better to choose someone who is a mother themselves and preferably they have had a home daycare open for 2+ years. This is just personal preference and I'm sure there are many excellent providers with no children and little experience, but I feel like another mother, one experienced in childcare, knows better what to expect and won’t become easily overwhelmed. Childcare is difficult and requires the kind of patience and understanding that only a seasoned mother can summon.

4) When interviewing you should see the entire daycare area, including the sleeping area and have an eye out for safety issues (like broken gates and toys, hazards, etc). After that you should be asking questions that gain you insights into your potential provider’s personality, behaviours and values. This is why it's important to pre-screen so you already know the essentials. IMHO a provider’s personality and approach towards issues around discipline, potty training, napping, bullying, feeding, self soothing, etc.... is much more important than whether or not they have and ECE diploma, circle-time or tons of toys.
You want a partner who will work with you, and if you and your provider have very differing view-points on key issues how will you ever work together?
Ask providers how they approach discipline, what behaviours do they think are not appropriate and their strategies to avoid/address them, how will they assist with potty-training (which should be started at home of course) and how will they address accidents in daycare? How will they communicate with you? Questions like, if my child doesn't like lunch and refuses to eat what will you do? If my child is misbehaving what strategies do you use to address his/her behaviour? If you feel strongly your child should not be punished for potty training accidents but can go a little hungry if they're being picky at lunch time then you should find a provider that feels the same way.
Remember that there are no right or wrong answers; you are simply looking for someone who is similar to you, within the constraints of providing group care. No provider can give the one-on-one attention or care that you can while they have 4-5 other children so your expectations must be realistic. Additionaly, you will have a hard time finding the right provider if all of your time during the interview is spent on operational questions, like fees and late policies, instead of the stuff that really matters.

GL!

fruitloop
04-29-2011, 02:14 PM
I agree with pretty much everything you've said here with the exception of the contract. I do not email my contract to parents...PERIOD! There are a lot of contract stealers out there so my feeling are...if you want my contract, you have to come get it. For actual parents that are interested in care, I prefer to be able to go over things with them. I have a fairly large handbook/contract and it contains a lot of information so I like to be able to explain things right there and then if parents have any questions. I do have a website though and I have a lot of that info on there for parents to read before coming.

Play and Learn
04-29-2011, 03:17 PM
I am not a parent, but am a provider with over 8-9 years experience working with children of all ages. PLEASE interview/shop around for a daycare suitable for your child (ren) and yourself! Not every child is fit for a home daycare or for a daycare center. Go with your gut feeling.

But, I do have to agree that you should have a phone 'interview' first, to have a feeling of the provider. As a provider myself, I decide if I wan to meet with that person, just by talking to them on the phone.

Don't pick a daycare just based on price - remember, this is your pride and joy that you're sending to another persons home to care for them!

I would like to mention that the PROVIDER is interviewing the parents. The parents are allowed to ask questions - come prepared with a list. If you decide you want to interview me, I'll give you my nanny rates!

Marie999
04-29-2011, 06:16 PM
[QUOTE=Play and Learn;2203]
Don't pick a daycare just based on price - remember, this is your pride and joy that you're sending to another persons home to care for them! QUOTE]

A very important point, that I forgot to mention!
5) Don't base any decisions on cost unless your budget makes it ABSOLUTLY impossible to do otherwise.
-A few dollars more per day is well worth it for a quality provider, especailly since they are underpaid for the service they provide IMO.

Judy Trickett
05-04-2011, 09:47 AM
Marie............

I must say, you are a gem. Seriously, you are. I find there are many parents who really don't understand what it is to be a daycare provider and often times, have unrealistic expectations that NO person, provider or otherwise, could meet given the responsibilities of this job and the care and concern of multiple children.

You are bang on in your advice (with the exception of giving contracts before the interview).
The reason most providers will not give out contracts before hand is that there ARE start up providers who are not professional who will pose as a parent to get a free contract that they, themselves will not put the work into and create. Sad, but true.

And, Marie, if you know anything about me, telling you that you are a true gem of a daycare parent is a big thing.:yes:

Your daycare provider is lucky to have you.

Marie999
05-30-2011, 08:33 PM
Marie............

I must say, you are a gem. Seriously, you are. I find there are many parents who really don't understand what it is to be a daycare provider and often times, have unrealistic expectations that NO person, provider or otherwise, could meet given the responsibilities of this job and the care and concern of multiple children.

You are bang on in your advice (with the exception of giving contracts before the interview).
The reason most providers will not give out contracts before hand is that there ARE start up providers who are not professional who will pose as a parent to get a free contract that they, themselves will not put the work into and create. Sad, but true.

And, Marie, if you know anything about me, telling you that you are a true gem of a daycare parent is a big thing.:yes:

Your daycare provider is lucky to have you.

I'll print off your quote and give it to my provider just so she knows what a catch I am!! :laugh:

OBVIOUSLY I'm kidding :p


Seriously now - Thanks, that's nice of you to say.

waterloo day mom
06-20-2011, 06:02 PM
I find it really frustrating when people assume that because I do not have any children of my own yet that I am inexperienced. Having worked at a preschool (specializing in special needs support), camps, volounteered in my church's nursery, as well as having gone through teacher's college, I can safely say that I have PLENTY of experience with children of all ages and more than enough patience. Please do not assume that childcare is the same as parenting. I am not these children's mother. I care about them, I want to see them grow and succeed, and I sincerely hope that in the future they remember me fondly and perhaps even keep in touch. However, I don't believe that any childcare provider would claim to be "mothering" the children in their care. Childcare means being able to handle the needs of many children at once, and to be able to work with children who are very different (different cultures, family types, discipline backgrounds, SES, parenting styles, etc). Not having my own children gives me a few advantages in this case. 1) I do not assume that the children coming into my house will be like mine. I am open to them as individuals. 2) I get peace and quiet and a childfree evening and weekends! Getting a good night sleep and not having to deal with diapers, crying, demands for attention etc after business hours means that I can relax and prepare myself for tomorrow. Don't get me wrong, I'm positive that there are many providers who have children who do a wonderful job (I even know some of them), but please don't discredit me or others who don't have children of their own. There are plenty of teachers and nannies out there who are not parents themselves and for the most part they also do a fabulous job. I realize that this post has been long and I apologize :)

mom-in-alberta
06-22-2011, 02:47 PM
You make some excellent points waterloo day mom.... Admittedly, I would probably have discounted in some way a child-free provider (if I was looking), but after hearing what you have to say, I totally agree with you. Thank you for sharing!

Play and Learn
06-22-2011, 02:51 PM
Thanks Waterloo Day Mom - I too, am childless so far - just got married a year ago on Sunday! I have over 10 years working with children in many different settings.

Loyer
02-07-2013, 09:20 AM
I just need to say that I am not a mother of my own kids I am a step mother of 2 and only have been for 2 years and I disagree with your statement about if the provider is not a mother they can get overwhelmed. Any mother can get over whelmed also just as well as anyone else and just because I am not a mother does not mean that I have no experience or little experience. I could have got my experiences from somewhere else and even have more experiences then a new mother.People go to school to become child care providers and work with children over time to figure out if that is the job that they would like to do.

kidlove
02-07-2013, 10:31 AM
Marie< thank you for being open and honest regarding your point of view in ALL areas, including lookinf for a provider who is a Mother herself, and has at least two years experience, that is your opinion and you have every right to look for that in the person who is taking care of your child. Although I know there are many providers out there who may not have children and do a terrific job (perhaps better than a lot of providers who do have children) ;) I do understand your point of view on the subject and I too would have the same point of view if I were looking for a good fit for my child, I don't want to assume the provider can care properly for my child due to their credentials...I would want solid evidence, and what better than a happy healthy family. There is nothing stronger than the bond between Mother and Child, Until I was a Mother, I don't think I had the understanding of children and their needs, and being a Mother deffinately makes me a better provider. again,not saying those of you out there who don;'t have children arent as great of Day Care providers, but I do agree with Marie, and say, that is def a PLUS in my book! :)

Inspired by Reggio
02-07-2013, 12:21 PM
Realizing that this post is over two years old and Marie has likely moved on after her share for those reading it now that it is been bumped I will add my two cents.

I agree that her advice on 'do your research' is impeccable and bang on ... specially love the sit down with your spouse and a create your must haves verses nice to haves verses deal breaker list so you are sure you are comparing apples to apples when looking around and most importantly are on the same page with your spouse to avoid conflict later!!

While I empathize with providers not wanting to send their 'verbatim contract' before an interview because of the practice of other businesses 'stealing ideas' from seasoned providers and such I do agree with Marie that the more 'non negotiable' stuff that is shared on a website or advertizement for clients seeking the better it is to avoid the huge waste of everyone's time when the 'financial commitments' are not out there in the open for those who truly cannot budget for the weekly fee, or take enough time off work to cover the 6 weeks or something a provider might be closed, the family pet or what not ... the deal breaker stuff like that should be shared prior to booking interviews for sure to weed out poor matches before the in person interview ... those providers you choose to actually interview in person should be the top 3 type scenario so you are sure that you would likely love any one of them but you just want to meet in person to ensure that the vibe from the advertizement is the same as the vibe from in person!

As for the 'choosing a mother whose been in business for 2 plus years' that is certainly a valid opinion and there are pros and cons to both those concepts that are going to have to be weighed by the individual ... I personally do not share the belief that a mother automatically makes a better childcare provider because I have seen first hand in my 25 plus years in the industry and having worked in centre care with early childhood educators who make wonderful 'caregivers/educators' and horrible parents raising demon spawn that most of us would cringe at and vise versa early childhood educators who are awesome with their own children who grown up well behaved and respectful but were a horror to work with because they could not manage 'group care' environment ... there are two different skill sets at play here .... the ones used to love and care for your OWN children than there are the ones you need to be able to respect and care for OTHER peoples and sadly some people just do not carry BOTH sets of skills ;)

The reality is that a child spending 9 months in a women's womb does not a 'ideal mother and caregiver' make ... if this statement were true that 'mothers just know best' there would never be any abused or neglected children in the world because they all came from a 'mother' who should just miraculously know what to do the minute they become a mother and how to manage a group of various aged children and so forth .... motherhood and caregiving while innate for many women is in reality a SKILL that one has to acquire ... for some it comes easy and naturally with little effort, for others they have to work hard at it and others NEVER acquire it despite having 'birthed' their children .... and if that is the reality of motherhood than logically it goes to conclude that the flip side is also true there are many women in the world who are an amazing 'mother' at heart without ever having given birth to a child because they acquired the skills naturally ;)

Skysue
02-07-2013, 05:31 PM
Marie9999 I agree your provider is very lucky to have you! It's so true if you don't share the same core values as your provider then it will never work.

kimmills
07-04-2013, 02:01 AM
I live in Encinitas and there are more than a few good daycare centers. I was wondering how I should pick one for my kids. Now that I read your post I think I would be able to find one very soon. Thank you very much for sharing the information.

Lighthouse1
07-04-2013, 03:36 PM
This has been a useful thread. I would also like to comment on the provider without parents. I don't think that is a fair statement. I've been working with children for almost 14 years, some of the first children I took care of are now in their early 20's!! My sister was born when I was 15 and I was her primary caregiver even though I still had to get myself through high school. But that is not something I share with my parents when I am interviewing them. I also don't mention that physically I am not ABLE to have children. So I would feel pretty awful if a parent immediately discounted me just because I don't have children of my own, especially if their child would have been a good fit in my centre, and I could have been a good influence on that child's life.

And one last thing, just because a centre has been open for less than 2 years doesn't mean anything either. Like I said - been in the business for 14 years, but I just opened my own centre in January of this year, that doesn't make me any less of a caregiver than the person down the street who has been open for 10 years.

giraffe
07-09-2013, 12:44 PM
At least you keep this forum entertaining darasmommy

Papaya
09-16-2013, 03:23 PM
Excellent advice, thank you!

KellyP
09-16-2013, 03:52 PM
For those of you offended at her remarks about not being a mother or not being open for more than 2+ years, she DID say as her VERY first words in that section "IMHO" meaning it was just her personal opinion. (She also went on to actually say it was just her personal opinion)

She even went so far as to say, "This is just personal preference and I'm sure there are many excellent providers with no children and little experience, " so I am pretty sure she wasn't trying to offend anyone, she was just stating HER opinions.

5 Little Monkeys
09-27-2013, 05:54 PM
I also do not have children of my own yet but when I opened up my hdc I had 3 years experience with daycare centres and a bit of schooling. My first group of parents actually said they chose me because I didn't have kids of my own so they knew that this was something that I obviously wanted to do because I enjoy it and wasn't just opening a hdc so I could stay home with my own children and make money doing it. (which isn't a bad thing either!)

I agree with your other advice though :) I give out my contract so that the parents can discuss it at home and come to the interview with prepared questions about my specific rules/policies/expectations. I don't want to waste my time interviewing parents who aren't going to agree and sign my contract. I actually met another hdcp on another forum and she helped me out by sending me her contract. I used it as a guide and we have some of the same policies and I changed things to better suit my wants/needs in my hdc. I was/am very thankful she did that and we still email almost daily because we have a lot of the same views and we are in the same area. I have been asked by other dcp's and potential dcp's if they can view my contract and I have no issue letting them see it. Each to their own, but to me it's not a big deal. I don't look at it as helping the competition but rather helping a potential new friend out.

boogiequeen
10-01-2013, 05:11 AM
Thanks Marie999 for explaining your experience. I think it would be helpful for me ;)