Kids who don't nap

[Mommy]

Hello everyone. So I have a couple new kids starting next month and the parents of each child informed me their child does not nap. One is three and a half and the other four. Nap time is my time to get snack ready, clean,dishes and relax. What do you guys do with the older kids that don't nap for you ? This was supposed to be my me time to prepare for the afternoon. Any thoughts ??

[Inspired by Reggio]

EVERYONE RESTS HERE and that is right in my handbook ;)

REST TIME is not negotiable ... for a one hour period following lunch everyone RESTS so that I can have my lunch break and recharge my batteries and so can THEY ... if after that hour they are a TRUE non sleeper and did not fall asleep while resting than they are invited to engage in quiet activities in the livingroom while the others who need to sleep sleep ~ if they cannot be QUIET while doing that and risk waking up others than they rest on their bed until everyone is up ;)

Honestly in my 6th year of home childcare and only had 1 kid who had TRULY outgrown her nap on a consistent basis and she was 6 years old and even she napped a few times each month cause she was 'fighting something' or was just over exhausted from play ... all the research on sleep and health states that children under the age of 6 still NEED 12-14 hours of sleep so unless they are in bed from 6pm - 8am daily chance are they are not getting all they NEED at night and therefore need a nap ;)

[Mamma_Mia]

My 5yr old dcg naps when she's here on PA days. Age means nothing....kids sleep because they need it not because they're lazy. I'd try to get them to REST and they happen to fall alseep in the dark warm room with no noise (LOL evil laugh) then so be it.

[apples and bananas]

Yup, everyone has quiet time here too. The nap for at least 2 hours and the big ones are required to stay quiet for the same. I tell parents right upfront that this is the expectation. If they don`t like it... move on! I need my quiet time.

[Crayola kiddies]

Everyone naps here too ... Not an option. I would put them on a sleep mat away from each other and tell them to rest quietly till I come back. This should be something that I would have discussed at the interview and for me this is a deal breaker.... I wouldn't have signed them on.

[Inspired by Reggio]

.... This should be something that I would have discussed at the interview and for me this is a deal breaker.... I wouldn't have signed them on.

Agreed I am very passionate about protecting the sleep of children ~ I get so frustrated when parents confuse the normal stage of 'sleep time resistance' at around age 3 with no longer NEEDING a nap .... I would not have signed on if they 'expected' me to keep their kid UP/ENGAGED the entire day because I truly believe children NEED to at the very least rest their body in the afternoon so they are in a state to 'sleep if needed'.

[Momof4]

Everyone naps here too. Even my PA day only boy as MammaMia stated. He plays his DS quietly for about 45 minutes in the dark on his bed then closes his eyes and sleeps for the next hour. I have an every other day JK girl who naps when she's here too. It isn't an option at my daycare because I need that break in the middle of my day or I would burn out quickly because I work hard and a lot of hours. So Do You!!!

[monkeymama]

I have a 4yo dcb who comes alternate kindergarten days and does not nap. For the first hour, he lays on my couch and looks at books and usually watches a movie. Next hour he does quiet activities ie. puzzles, coloring pictures etc. He knows he has to stay quiet and his parents are aware of my rules and are ok with it. This week he has been fighting a cold so he spent most of the time on my couch, in and out of sleep.

[daycarewhisperer]

I don't provide services to children who don't need a full afternoon nap.

[mlle.coccinelle]

Same here... children need that time to rest and so do I! We don't get breaks, we don't get a lunch break and we work really hard to keep the peace, make sure everyone is having fun and learning tons! We deserve that ''break time''

[Serendipity]

They might not nap but they will surely rest and have quiet time just like everyone else. If they were disruptive or loud so the others couldn't sleep, then I wouldn't accept them into care.

I don't provide quiet activities like books or puzzles either. ALL kids lie down on nap mats and rest quietly for a specific amount of time. If they sleep, great. If not, they still rest.

NO NEGOTIATIONS.

[angelina]

1 to 3 pm is my Quite Time. Those who nap, that is perfect. Those who don't, stay quite until the 2:45 pm wake up light is on.

luckily for me, 99% they ALL nap, including me. for my daughter almost 4, she would say no, but if she see me laying on the bed, she does lay beside me and fall to sleep.

and we all wake up happy and ready to tackle the afternoon fun!

[Serendipity]

1 to 3 pm is my Quite Time. Those who nap, that is perfect. Those who don't, stay quite until the 2:45 pm wake up light is on.

luckily for me, 99% they ALL nap, including me. for my daughter almost 4, she would say no, but if she see me laying on the bed, she does lay beside me and fall to sleep.

and we all wake up happy and ready to tackle the afternoon fun!

You nap while you have kids there?!?

I don't mean to sound rude but seriously you fall asleep WHILE the other kids are sleeping/resting, napping?

I can't even begin to think of all the things that could happen if the provider was napping while "on the clock"!

Is this the norm for providers in your area?

As a parent, if I knew my provider was napping at the same time the kids were napping, I would find a new provider.

Sorry, if that comes across as sounding rude, I don't mean it to be but I am just having a hard time digesting that it would ever be considered ok.

[Inspired by Reggio]

I could never actually intentionally nap while on the clock either Serendipity ~ perhaps what Angelina means is she lays down and RESTS to let her child think she too is napping in order to get her to sleep?

The liability if something happened and it was found we were actually sleeping is huge ... there was a story in the news a year or so back just this in NY ~ and the women had to serve three years in jail for it and got deported from the States ... now admittedly she feel asleep with a child not 'contained' but the reality is that no child is ever truly contained in our programs ~ kids get out of pack and plays all the time, they figure out child proof locks and so forth :(

http://www.reuters.com/article/2011/03/28/us-crime-drowning-idUSTRE72R6LH2011032 8

There have been other cases over the years too ~ a provider who lay down in the sleep room with the kids which was in the basement to help rub backs and she fell asleep too and awoke to the fire alarm going off ... the playroom did not have proper fire exits from it and they could not get up the stairs because the fire had spread to the doorway of the basement which was right by the kitchen .... they ALL died in that fire including the provider ... the inquest from that is one of the reasons that all 'areas of your program should have two viable fire exits' ... BTW this provider had 'windows' down there but they were apparently painted shut and not large enough to get out of and she succumb to smoke inhalation trying to get them open :(

It is sadly not uncommon for providers to fall asleep on the job ... I know in centre care staff 'nodded off' all the time in sleep rooms with the darkness and quiet music playing you'd fall asleep sitting up all the time but thankfully we had multiple adults to go over and give each other a nudge to wake up and do their job ... falling asleep on the job is definitely a hazzard in this job or any job for that matter when you have been up all night with your own kids, your own health or whatever and we should all have precautions in place to 'prevent' that from happening .... heck a police officer in our home town just got sanctioned for falling asleep on the job while supposedly monitoring a crime scene and the media videotaped her and a bus driver got nailed a little while later for it .... and none of them were immune from the public scrutiny of having done so!

I get that as 'parents' we all sleep while our children are home however the reality is there is a different STANDARD OF LIABILITY when you are getting PAID to do the job verses it being your own unpaid job you are doing .... your own kid dies cause you were sleeping and they got into mischief no one comes looking for 'justice' and sadly there are dozens of cases of that in the media as well ... however someone elses kid dies or is injured while you are being paid to keep them safe they are going to be looking for some sort of 'accountability' for that action!

Look at the drowning inquest in Ottawa right now .... 1000's of children die every year in swimming pools and no inquests but a child dies in a pool while under the supervision of someone ELSE and inquest ... life is never going to be the same for ANY of us after that inquest is over cause we are held accountable for the actions of that ONE business!

Now all that said I do admit that I still choose to 'lay down' on the couch and read a book or play games on my Nintendo or surf online from my phone just to rest my back from sitting and standing position for a bit because otherwise I risk my back going out on me again ... so for at least 30 minutes I am 'resting' along with the kids BUT I am still awake and as a precaution I set the alarm on my phone for 10 minutes intervals 'just in case' until I am ready to get up and tackle the afternoon ... so if for some reason I DID fall asleep on my break time I have the monitor on the kids sleeping rooms if they were to awake and the alarm is on and both are by my ear to wake me up if god forbid I actually did dose off while reading or something cause well I am human and realize anything is possible and take precautions as such!

[Serendipity]

Re-reading, it does sound like she is saying her daughter would say no to napping so she "pretend" naps to get her daughter to sleep. Definitely hoping that is the case.

I didn't mean to sound so harsh, but I just had this discussion with another forum board and the members didn't think napping while the kids slept was a big deal.

There is just no way anyone can convince me that naping while the daycare kids nap is safe or ok under any circumstances.

[angelina]

Serendipity: I am with you 100%, we are not entitled to naps. The most I get is reading a book in my couch, or go in this forum and learn more.

Plus, you won't have that break anyways. While laying down, my brain is running 100 miles per hour thinking of my things to do for the afternoon session. (so, i will get up after 30 minutes of laying down with a road map in my head). I need to prep the afternoon activity; vegetable tray need to get ready, make sure the spinach dip is separate. Make sure the cups are all lined up in the small table, so toddlers can grab their own water. Make sure I got my own snacks too. Make sure the writing centers are in full capacity, have enough sharpened pencils as the after school ask for it when you are really busy having crafts with the toddlers. And set up the craft table in the basement, so we all go down after snack for crafts. I like to make a smooth transition, if not, I get lost in my own program.

I have not heard of that fire accident, that is very terrible. That is why I made the decision of making my living room the play area/sleeping area, as we have lots of big doors and windows for exit when needed. The basement is a back up place for craft time and shelving units for toys.

I can tell you I am very affected by the Orleans inquest, since we live 20 minutes away from that Daycare. I have calls from potential client asking if I have a pool.
Actually there is a fence pool few steps away from my fence backyard, summer pool owned by Homestead Homes and manage by City of Ottawa. Of course, it has padlock and it always has a lifeguard when open. It is a habit of mine saying - yes, there is a pool in my backyard. OPS!

Reggio, thanks for explaining it. I think it is still part of "teaching/learning moments" when you show them that you lay down, then they will follow you too.

I recall from one of my caregiver workshop by Ontario Early Years, about modeling behavior. The case study was a toddler who does not sit for snack time/lunch time. And we all brain storm why and we concluded that it was because the caregiver never sit down with them too. So, it was one of those "aha moments". Sit down once you get your snack too, they will follow you.

Parents have much more leeway, just because they are parents. There are parents I know that needed caregiver training to run their own house and their kids. I sometimes chat with her, and she usually say, I don't know how you handle it with four kids everyday, when my two kids are more than enough.

I wanted to say " its business that i love, and i have clear plans for the day to keep our lives manageable and fun", but...
I just say, well......our kindergarten teachers have like 20-30 of them, and they are doing great!

[Serendipity]

Angelina....Thank you for clarifying that. I re-read your post and do see what you meant about taking the lead and showing your daughter what you wanted her to do and if it appeared as if I were jumping to conclusions but I immediately had visions of worst case scenarios when children are sleeping while the caregiver is as well and thought....OMG! But as I said, I mis-read and understood your words incorrectly. I apologize.

Glad to hear though that you are really napping....although a nap once in a while would be heavenly. LOL!

[kidlove]

I didnt read the others responses but am willing to bet mine is just near what others have to say. In my contracts on the very first page I clearly state that IF a child comes into my care and does not participate in quiet time or rest time/nap time, that is grounds for termination. EVERYONE must rest. Plain and simple..if these kids don't sleep, so be it, but they must lay still and be quiet causing no trouble so you can get your break and your much needed preparation for the rest of the day done. IF NOT? They can go somewhere else where the providers sanity and the childs health and safety are not as valued. :)