Some parents..

[DeeDee]

Some parents drive me crazy, I have these two brothers that come here, some days they show up in their PJ's that they have been sleeping in all night long. Sometimes the baby's diaper isn't even changed. Their faces not washed.. When I ask there mom why ey are in pj's she says they didn't want to get dressed.. Who lets their 2 year old and one year old decided if they want to wear clothes or not!!! Come on really. What would you say if your kids showed up like this. Or am I being too dramatic? Also what do your abrviations stand for?

[kidlove]

the kind of parent that allows their child to decide whether or not to get dressed in the am is the kind of parent who doesn't want to deal with anything that early in the am. If you don't want them in their pj's just inform parents that children are expected to show up "ready for the day" that includes, dressed and diaper changed.....if you want, you could have them bring clothes for the kids to get dressed at your house, I do that for a 6:30 drop off, it's just too early for the little one. But either way, I think it's crazy that parents allow their children to make the choices in life, IMO...that's lazy parenting!

[apples and bananas]

I understand your frustration. It's not the way that I parent, but who am I to judge who others parent.

In saying that... this doesn't sound like a family that I would want to have a connection too. So, I would probably find some reason to terminate eventually.

Do they send clothes for you to dress them in? Or are they in their jammies all day?

[DeeDee]

I

In saying that... this doesn't sound like a family that I would want to have a connection too. So, I would probably find some reason to terminate eventually.

Haha that would be if it wasn't my sister in law... And yes she does send clothes for them.

[daycarewhisperer]

She's lying to you. She's taking the kids from bed to car and not spending any time with them in the morning. She thinks she came up with it on her own but that "he didn't want to" line has been used for decades and it's VERY common words to go along with the laziness of not getting your kids up and ready for day care.

You can tell her that your policy is that kids MUST come fully dressed and changed every day for day care or you charge a five dollar per kid "morning readiness" fee. That needs to be paid daily upon arrival if she would like for YOU to get them ready. That is the fee per kid.

The next phase is she will have them sleep in their daycare clothes and bring them wet or dirty and tell you that they pooped or peed on the way to day care. Tell her BEFORE she starts this that the fee is charged whether the kid is dirty or wet from their home or on the way. Tell her that usually when this happens that kids will start pooping and flooding their diapers on the way to day care and the fee applies if they don't come to child care clean, dry, dressed, etc.

She has the option to stay home with them in the morning until they are "ready" to get dressed or she can pay someone else to do her job. If she wants to hire it out you can make a cool ten bucks a day for something that will take ten minutes. Win win

[Crayola kiddies]

My policy book states that "children must come prepared for the day dressed with clean hands, face, and have eaten breakfast". Now for some of the early birds I do give them a parent supplied breakfast but that is all prearranged at contract signing.

[daycarewhisperer]

I understand your frustration. It's not the way that I parent, but who am I to judge who others parent.

In saying that... this doesn't sound like a family that I would want to have a connection too. So, I would probably find some reason to terminate eventually.

Do they send clothes for you to dress them in? Or are they in their jammies all day?

Oh I'm not judging them. I just don't include morning dressing and changing in my fee so they would need to pay an additional fee for it. If they want the rate to remain the same and save the money they can do it themselves. It aint personal. It's just time and time is money.

[DeeDee]

I like all of your ideas, but what if it was your sister in law? Would you still handle it like that?

[Sandbox Sally]

My policy book states that "children must come prepared for the day dressed with clean hands, face, and have eaten breakfast". Now for some of the early birds I do give them a parent supplied breakfast but that is all prearranged at contract signing.

Same here. I think I got that from you Crayola! ;) I have never had a parent drop off in wet diaper/jammies yet, except just one time, when it was MY idea... Daycare mom was a grad student, and her daughter was up ALL night. She needed some relief.

[daycarewhisperer]

I like all of your ideas, but what if it was your sister in law? Would you still handle it like that? I don't provide service to friends, relatives, neighbors or friends of friends, relatives or neighbors so I wouldn't care for a SIL kid.

It wouldn't matter if the child was family or not. They take the same time to do morning cares whether they are related to you or not. The mom doesn't think it's a big deal. If it's no big deal then just do it at home. If it's a big deal then pay big bucks and get it done for you.

[kidlove]

oh sister-in-law, gotcha there! i have a sister in law that I sometimes provide care for too. the only advice i can give you is attempt to treat her as all the other parents, otherwise she will begin to think she has "special allowances" that can become a problem later, if not a problem already! :) as far as the kids coming in pj's? that is up to you, noone can give you advice in that area, if it bothers you, gently comment to her that the kids do need to be dressed and ready for the day upon arrival, plain and simple, don't make a big deal out of the conversation just mention it at drop off or better yet maybe pickup. If you dont really mind the pj's (which is not what I am sensing) but if you dont mind then just ask her to provide the kids change of clothes and if anything have baby in a fresh diaper at drop off, that's just respectful and caring toward you and the child. Could be that she is just a "lazy" parent or it could be that she thinks she can push the limits cuz your family or could be a little of both. Don't forget, she is a client just like all the rest and expect her to follow your rules just like all the rest.. i know because like I said i too have family, and although you need to tread lightly, or keep things confrontation free with family, you also need to get the point across that you can not be used. ;) address it quick and matter of fact. and you'll be fine! let me know how it goes. ;)

[Inspired by Reggio]

It is a sad reality of the state of the world we live in that there is no 'common sense' among us anymore because there is so many vastly different values, belief systems and ways to do things!

When I chose to work from home with the freedom of being my own boss and making my own 'rules' I sat down and reflected on all the things that 'sucked at my soul' to see in my years of doing centre daycare and I created clear values and policies in my handbook to ensure I did not have to DEAL WITH THAT anymore ;)

Including THIS sadly ... the expectations is that unless it is a schedule PAJAMA PARTY DAY that every child arrive to program 'dressed appropriately for the weather, fed breakfast, and able to cope within the programs regular activities'.

Most providers contracts and policy handbooks continue to 'evolve' over the years as they learn from experience that you cannot trust clients to 'know' what you expect of them and it needs to be all spelled out to avoid dealing with conflict over what is common sense to the provider but 'unreasonable expectation' to the client ... you know like they arrive on time for pick up, that they pay their fees on time without bouncing payments or having to be chased, that their children are not little demon spawn who run through your house destroying everything in their path :rolleyes:

[Inspired by Reggio]

I like all of your ideas, but what if it was your sister in law? Would you still handle it like that?

I agree with the other ladies that during 'business hours' the rules are the same for EVERYONE regardless of their blood line or relationship to me ... even my stepson had to follow all the rules of the daycare when he was here in the program until he was old enough to 'leave the premise' for things like quiet time he had to engage in quiet time to be fair and respectful to the other children!