Picky Eater

[monkeys]

I had a new family start at the beginning of the month. I have forgotten what it is like to have a picky eater in the house.

I serve breakfast, lunch, and 2 snacks and I am lucky if dhg eats more than a bite of food. She has asked for food between meals/snack, but I remind her that we eat at set times. I can't help, but feel bad for her as I know she is hungry. I also know that giving her what she wants, won't help her either.

I serve a variety of healthy foods, and find she will only try something that has been pre-packaged (granola bars, some crackers, etc.) When I served grilled cheese sandwiches (whole wheat bread and real cheese) she only ate a quarter of it. I asked her mom about eating habits at home, but it seems like this maybe the first time there has been any expectations with food and eating.

I have noticed that the other kids are now, eating less and putting up a fuss about what is being served.

Oh, how I wish I had a magic wand that made every child a good eater.

[sunnydays]

Oh yes...the pickyness is contagious. I have one who is picky (although she has improved a lot since she started with me in November) and now my daughter suddenly no longer likes green beans (after hearing dcg say it 14 million times). It's tough when they start with you at an older age. My dcg tells me she eats Captain Crunch for breakfast...so I know what the problem is ;)

[sierra]

I have picky eaters too. I just stick to my schedule and they will follow along eventually. I always ask for updates on what the kids are eating at home to help guid my meal planning. I have one mom who always says a hungry kid will never starv with food in front of them.

[Momof4]

Obviously her parents aren't firm with her at mealtimes to eat healthy food and give in to her which is not a great parenting choice. However, you must stick to your meal plans and keep providing her with the healthy choices but just give her a tiny bit of everything. If she's hungry and she learns there is no other option she will eat eventually and give up the power struggle. She knows she controls things at home but she will learn that she can't control things at daycare.

[monkeys]

Thanks guys, I think I just needed the reassurance of others. Mom said today that they are starting to increase their expectations around food. Dhg drank her milk at lunch and I found out she won't drink it at home. Yay, two small victories!!!!

[sunnydays]

Yeah, my picky eater started improving after about a month...for the first month she just looked at her plate and barely touched anything. Now she is eating all kinds of things she won't eat at home. I don't expect her to like everything, but at least she know eats a huge quantity of what I serve. It comes with time if you stay strong and just serve what you serve...eventually she will start eating (hopefully).

[KingstonMom]

Sorry to piggyback this thread, but I'm in the same boat with a new dcb. What would you do if a dck didn't touch anything that was offered for lunch? Wld you offer a 2nd healthy alternative instead? (Though that cld result in them ALL wanting a 2nd choice, I know)

Also, what would you do if NONE of the kids touched what was served? Haha maybe I'm a horrible cook, but this happened to me once with my homemade chilli! It really was good, but they all, one by one turned their noses up.

[monkeys]

No worries about piggybacking, its getting my picky eater brain awake and getting me back to being ready for the struggles and victories ahead.

I only serve what is on my menu, no second healthy choices. The child will then learn if they keep holding out something else will be offered.

If I have a new item I am trying out, then I make sure it's served with a familiar food. I made stew once and it did not go over well, but I served it with a salad and a whole wheat bun. I do the same at snack when trying a new or less familiar fruit.

[Calgarymom]

So what when they cry that they want to go home as they hated what you served at lunch and were STARVING. - This happened this week. Also same child will say "I don't want that when is snack and what are we having?" I have tried " if you don't eat this now then this is for snack " but then they cry(a lot) they want to go home as they are starving!! (4 years old). I'm not too sure parents are fully onboard with good eating habits (in the early am) as they often turn up with half eaten gronola (sp) bars, which go straight in garbage but how do you deal with this type of situation (again sorry for piggybacking -good word)

[Crayola kiddies]

I don't allow the children to say eeeww, I hate that, that's gross, ect because it gets the others ones on the same bandwagon. If a child said to me " I hate that when's snack and what is it?" I would tell them snack looks exactly like lunch but if the lunch is all gone then it will be something really yummy". And if the child ate the lunch I would make sure the snack was that child's favourite if they didn't eat the lunch then I would follow through. It wouldn't take long for that child to start eating without the fuss. However it's the fuss at home that works and that's why they are picky eaters.
Picky eaters are created not born !

[crafty]

For me I stick to what I have made ... a small amount will be served and if they eat it they receive praise and if they dont too bad. They are not getting a second option. They will not starve to death that is for sure and I am not running a restaurant. I have this little guy very picky and I always ask him to take at least one bite before he goes back playing whit is friends. He's usually cooperative for one bite. I dont push it... it just causes stress for me and the child.

[Dreamalittledream]

Sorry to piggyback this thread, but I'm in the same boat with a new dcb. What would you do if a dck didn't touch anything that was offered for lunch? Wld you offer a 2nd healthy alternative instead? (Though that cld result in them ALL wanting a 2nd choice, I know)

Also, what would you do if NONE of the kids touched what was served? Haha maybe I'm a horrible cook, but this happened to me once with my homemade chilli! It really was good, but they all, one by one turned their noses up.
I never offer a 2nd choice, EVER. I too had this problem with chili...then I put fish crackers in it...they loved going fishing for the crackers & they ate it;). So, that has been my go to for anything they won't all eat (last week it was beef stew).

[kidlove]

i have always been firm on meal time! I inform the kids that what we eat is healthy and helps them to grow big and strong, what kid doesn't desire to grow "big and strong" I have gotten it all...from throwing up all over the lunch table when I ask them to try everything, to gagging on green beans, I had a boy try and swallow a cherry tomato whole and choke (I now cut in two), but they still have to try everything. I know I am a big meany, but I am not serving a plate of garbage or maggots :rolleyes: I am serving good and healthy food. They are required to show respect when they are at my table, no complaining, no crying as a matter of fact, I like to hear "thank you for lunch" and see smiles. As long as they attempt I am proud of them, if they finish it all, even more proud! With some picky eaters, I will offer the rest a yummy surprise after lunch if they clean their plates and you would be amazed at how fast that "picky" eater will eat their food as well!
I do have to add, things are much more difficult if the parents are not encouraging the same behavior at home as well, I always talk with the parents and inform them of the issue, let them know what I expect here and point out, the best results will come from us all being on the same page. Just like any other issue, potty training, behavior expectations...if only one of us is working with the child, they will get mixed signals and will make things twice as hard to deal with. Heres to hoping your parents are on board with you, and not giving in at home! ;)

[kidlove]

and NEVER give an alternate choice! that just sends a message to the child that THEY ARE IN CHARGE! not you! keep the power in your hands and encourage them to eat the healthy food you have provided. let them go hungry if they refuse, but no fun rewards for the rest of the day! they will figure it out on their own.

[Momof4]

Sorry to piggyback this thread, but I'm in the same boat with a new dcb. What would you do if a dck didn't touch anything that was offered for lunch? Wld you offer a 2nd healthy alternative instead? (Though that cld result in them ALL wanting a 2nd choice, I know)

Also, what would you do if NONE of the kids touched what was served? Haha maybe I'm a horrible cook, but this happened to me once with my homemade chilli! It really was good, but they all, one by one turned their noses up.

I'm sure you are a wonderful cook! I keep a daily logbook, not for the parents but for me. I make notes for myself when children are new whether they have eaten the food I prepared or not. For instance, if they wouldn't eat a wrap that I made I will have a note about that and I will try it again maybe 3-4 months down the road. I give the parents verbal updates daily and get their advice on what they serve at home to their children so I can prepare the meals so every child is happy and has a full tummy.

But NO there is no other alternative. We aren't running restaurants. It's a learning process just like with your own children to see what each child will eat or not. But I agree with the poster who mentioned that they don't allow children to say ewww or other words like that at the table. I'll allow 'I don't like that', but that's IT!

[mom-in-alberta]

NO 2ND CHOICE!!!! LoL
I stressed in the beginning about who was eating what, and how much. But over time, I have relaxed about it. I know that I make good, wholesome food, that is good for them. I do not (to save my sanity) try to cook anything "exotic". Leave that to the parents! I just end up throwing away what equates to MY money.
I usually provide a protein, a carb and a veggie/fruit at meal time, in addition to a glass of milk. At snack, there are at least 2 options from different food groups. That means that nobody should go home "STARVINGGGGG".
I do take note of what just flat out doesn't go over well, with the group as a whole. And maybe I will take that out of rotation for a little while, and try again later. In my experience, "mixed up foods" (casseroles, chili and stews) are not winners. But I know a lot of ladies here serve them all the time. So it just depends on the crew you have.
And have you noticed? Every parent thinks (or tells you!) that their kid is a "good eater". Liars!!! LoL

[Momof4]

I had a little boy in care for over 3 years who was the pickiest eater I have ever met. He wouldn't eat any food that was mixed together, like a casserole or chili or even pasta with sauce. Sometimes I wanted to make one of these things because all the other children like them. I stuck to my rule that you have to do your very best to eat your food before you get fruit but 0I would give him extra food at afternoon snack. I always told his Mom the truth at pickup, that he wouldn't eat his lunch and he might be extra hungry at supper.

[mimi]

I have a dcg who sits and looks at what has been served and doesn't attempt to eat until she realizes I am ignoring her not eating and am not offering another choice (like at home) then she eats and finishes everything. Nice try tootes!

[monkeys]

Big success today, dcg ate at lunch!!!! She ate an entire whole wheat carrot cake pancake!!!! It was healthy, not prepackaged and she liked it!!!!

[kidlove]

yay! big step!