Announcing termination

[mlle.coccinelle]

Ok, its probably not listed in the right place... But Oh well!

I have decided that I am done being nice and I will terminate one of the family tonight...
I'm termination letter is printed out, in an envelope by the door ready to go. In the letter it explane pretty well why I am terminating this family.... But should I say something as I am handing the letter to the mom at pick up tonight?

This is the first time I am terminating someone... and I am very nervous about this........! But her daughter is too much to handle and the mom is a pain in my behind so I decided to do it so I can stay sane a little longer :laugh:

[dodge__driver11]

I say something along the lines of, this is something that I need you to take home and read over. Please email/call me if you have any questions.

[mimi]

Is this coming out of the blue for the mom or is she aware of the difficulties you have been having with her daughter? I think if she doesn't see this coming I would very briefly tell her I could no longer care for her child and the details are in the letter. Then I would tell her to call/email you with any concerns.

[mlle.coccinelle]

oh, she has been aware for weeks and weeks... they have had 3 verbal notice, 3 written notice that their daughter's behaviour is not acceptable. they were also 2 hours late one Friday night 3weeks ago..... and they were 1 hour late the day I had to take the plane for my holiday... ( I called 5 times before they picked up that time)..... So I took my holidays, though about it and decided I was done with them being late, not dressing her up for the weather ( she rarely have winter suit... and when she does its -20 and she expecting me to go outside with my 16 MO baby...) Her daughter is 4... she dosen't talk, dosen't listen to the rules, still suck her fingers........ holds her breath when she is upset and she covered my washroom in poop twice in the past 3 months............ Yup, I'm done!

[Skysue]

You have more patience than I do, I would have terminated on the spot the day she made you late for the airport, it's one thing for being late but not being contactable for an hour. What if it were an emergency, that would have made my blood boil.

[mlle.coccinelle]

yeah... well that was pretty much when I said to myself ok, i'm done... She is here today and i have no patience with her... its so hard because Ill my girls are great talkers and listeners.... and she is NOT!
She is a very sweet girl... but I don't feel like pulling all my hair out :rolleyes:

[GymMom]

You are absolutely doing the right thing. If having this girl in your home is making you miserable, it is difficult to provide great care for other children - believe me, I know! I only lasted a week though - good for you for persisting, but it is not worth dreading each and every day! Just know that you are doing the right thing for yourself, your family, the other children in your care and even the child that is not the right fit for your dayhome!

[mommylove]

I had a boy 4yrs old claw (literally) my face off cause i had to carry him from the bus stop to my backyard cause he refused to come........as i carried this 40lb boy the entire way home he clawed my face thank god my babies were sleeping at this time i was bleeding and was so upset......i found myself even after that incident feeling bad for the boy i learned a hard lesson......it continued he would swear, kick me, punch me and more i hated my job i dreaded every day......finally i said enough is enough and terminated them (2 sibling as well whom i adored and were great kids :( ) Now when i look back I think what was i thinking, I would NEVER settle again.....i have 2 girl 1 is 11 months and the other i have had since she was 1 and shes now turning 2 in may and 1 after school boy who is a sweetheart, LOVING every moment now :)

[mimi]

mlle.c, oh wow I didn't realize. Heres the letter and don't let the door hit you in the a$$.:glare:

[monkeymama]

I think its only fair to atleast say something while they are leaving. just make it short and sweet. the shouldnt be surprised considering all the conversations/warnings preceding this.

[sunnydays]

Wow...so glad you are terminating this family. You don't deserve that kindof treatment and you will feel a million times lighter once they are gone. Good luck!

[mlle.coccinelle]

Ahah Mimi, you made me laugh so hard I almost choked! than you for that! :laugh::laugh:

[mimi]

After all the stress these people have caused you I'm glad I could give you a chuckle :glomp:

[Crayola kiddies]

I would never just stick a letter in someone's bag and say read it when you get home.... I think that's lousy and poor business sense..... Tell her you would like to talk for a minute and then explain that after much reflection you have decide to end care and that the reason are the issues you have been having of late (whatever you have discussed with get in the past repeatedly) and then say you put a letter on writing in the bag for her records.

[dodge__driver11]

@Crayola I agree in some ways..If however I do not want to deal with that parent's outburst at the door, this is what I say.

[mimi]

Too true Crayola, but sometimes desperate times call for desperate measures. I had a client in my early days that broke almost every policy and laughed off any attempts I made to get her to comply. She was a beautiful woman and apparently no one ever told her no. So if you said no she would think you were kidding. I finally after many failed attempts to get her co operation I made up a term letter and as she was leaving on my porch I told her there was a letter in her childs back pack and I wished her well. The shocked look on her face was priceless. I never heard from her again.

[mlle.coccinelle]

ahah mimi..... ! I kinda want the happy middle between slipping the letter in the kiddos bag and sitting down and having a chat.... she is well aware that I am upset at her and sick and tired of her daughter's behaviour.....

But, again, maybe i'm too nice and should use the slipping the letter in the bag technique because I know she will fight it... and I really don't want that

[Momof4]

Mlle.coccinelle, I'm terminating a family tomorrow at pickup time so they have the long weekend to absorb it, we have Family Day as a stat here in Ontario on Monday. I intend to tell the parents that it's strictly a business decision with little more explanation that that. It is my business and I have a right to make the decision. Same for you. But I have to give them 2 weeks and that is the part that is stressing me out, having them around for 2 more weeks hating me.