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View Full Version : Parents tell me how many wipes to use?



Marie
06-20-2011, 11:01 AM
Today when I was about to change one of my daycare kids diaper, the parents had put a note on the wipe case telling me to only use one for pee (which I do) and 1-3 for poop. I always go over 3 because this kid poops a lot twice a day, always in the morning. I don't even know how to address this because I think it's absolutely ridiculous. Any suggestions?

Play and Learn
06-20-2011, 11:15 AM
I would just brush it off. What are they going to do, not bring you wipes when you need more of them?

zen39
06-20-2011, 11:16 AM
As you said, that is ridiculous. So much so, that I don't think I'd even be bothered to respond to her. If the next time you request wipes and she says something about how quickly you're going through them, then address the issue than.

I have a similar situation with two of my young ones...they poop frequently through the day and they are not "clean" poopers...sounds funny...but what I mean is I have one that poops out a nice ball of poop. The other two always have very soft poop that is in every knook and cranny...and takes lots of wipes to clean up.

I'll use anywhere from 1 - 3 wipes for poo and on the occassion I've even used 4.

If the parent ever said anything, explain that the child poops more than once and you are careful with the wipes but with that said, you'll use what you feel is necessary to clean the child and to keep your hands free and clear of poop.

Marie
06-20-2011, 11:18 AM
Yes, they would stop bringing wipes...lol. They are very stingy for basically everything so I feel everything I use is measured by them. I'm sure they measure the formula when they get back home.

KingstonMom
06-20-2011, 11:21 AM
It seems like they are being more concerned with the dollar value of wipes opposed to having their childs bum clean. do they really think you would use wipes if it were not NECESSARY to get poop off??
it is ridiculous yes, and I agree with the other posts, throw the note out and forget about their request. Address it if they bring it up again. tell them that you do not leave bums dirty. Wow. they're nuts.

KingstonMom
06-20-2011, 11:24 AM
Yes, they would stop bringing wipes...lol. They are very stingy for basically everything so I feel everything I use is measured by them. I'm sure they measure the formula when they get back home.

This is insane!!! So if they stopped bring wipes they would expect YOU to buy more for THEIR child?? Yikes. Boot them out for breach of contract if they do this. They are to supply wipes. Period.

Play and Learn
06-20-2011, 11:32 AM
Yes, they would stop bringing wipes...lol. They are very stingy for basically everything so I feel everything I use is measured by them.

If this does become the case that they will stop bringing you wipes, you provide the wipes, but charge them an arm and a leg for it. They don't like it, then you could always give them a warning.

As one of my dcparents told me about a reference call, I wouldn't change anything with the provider. My child gets excited when we drive into the subdivision, she's feed, has been napping, and gets loving care with toys to play with!

Maybe you could have a sit-down talk with these parents if that comes to the case where they won't provide you with any items. Is it in your manual that these parents have to provide you with wipes? Show them that, and that they've signed.

Marie
06-20-2011, 11:36 AM
If this does become the case that they will stop bringing you wipes, you provide the wipes, but charge them an arm and a leg for it. They don't like it, then you could always give them a warning.

As one of my dcparents told me about a reference call, I wouldn't change anything with the provider. My child gets excited when we drive into the subdivision, she's feed, has been napping, and gets loving care with toys to play with!

Maybe you could have a sit-down talk with these parents if that comes to the case where they won't provide you with any items. Is it in your manual that these parents have to provide you with wipes? Show them that, and that they've signed.

It is in my manual that they provide wipes. Every day they bring just enough for the day in one of those little diaper bags wipe cases, so sometimes if the child poops 3 times, which happens frequently, they get the case empty. I think I'm just going to tell them I use what I need and that's that.

Spixie33
06-20-2011, 12:02 PM
LOL there really are all kinds of parents out there.

I have no idea how many wipes I use. I know that on some of the more soft BM kids I use probably 6-8 wipes easy. I don't count. I wipe until the job is done. I try to fold over and use the same wipe as much as possible but I am not prepared to get feces all over my hands just to budget wipes. We usually have to do diaper changes pretty quick so that is a consideration too.

I use baby wipes to wipe off little faces or hands sometimes too but I have never had a complaint that I am using too much.

I sent wipes every day to my daycare provider when I had one and I was mortified if she ever told me that she ran out. I would feed bad for her and my child.

The parents can probably get away with less because they have more time to fold over multiple times and are just changing one child and also it is their own child's BM They are dealing with but I think they should be able to have enough courtesy to think of your comfort and needs as a provider too:(

sunnydays
06-20-2011, 12:28 PM
LOL there really are all kinds of parents out there.

I have no idea how many wipes I use. I know that on some of the more soft BM kids I use probably 6-8 wipes easy. I don't count. I wipe until the job is done. I try to fold over and use the same wipe as much as possible but I am not prepared to get feces all over my hands just to budget wipes. We usually have to do diaper changes pretty quick so that is a consideration too.

I use baby wipes to wipe off little faces or hands sometimes too but I have never had a complaint that I am using too much.

I sent wipes every day to my daycare provider when I had one and I was mortified if she ever told me that she ran out. I would feed bad for her and my child.

The parents can probably get away with less because they have more time to fold over multiple times and are just changing one child and also it is their own child's BM They are dealing with but I think they should be able to have enough courtesy to think of your comfort and needs as a provider too:(

I totally agree! That is ridiculous! Not only should they be concerned with their child's comfort and yours, but also the health conditions! If you are trying to save wipes and end up with feces on your hands because of it, the chances of spreading disease is much greater even if you wash your hands. Plus, if I am out at the park I am extra careful not to get any on my hands and then I use an extra wipe to clean my hands plus some hand sanitizer after that. I am sure that I frequently use at least 4 or 5 on those kids who have soft poops and some of them poop multiple times a day. All my parents are more than happy to replenish supplies when I tell them they are low (they send bulk supplies and I tell them when I need more rather than daily). If the parents really want to save money they could use cloth diapers and cloth wipes (I use them and so do most of my daycare kids), but I still use the regular wipes for outings or giant poopy clean-ups.

Marie
06-20-2011, 12:39 PM
I don't understand how a parent could ask that of a daycare provider. Don't they want what's best for their child? I should mention to them that they should be lucky I don't ask them to supply Kleenex too. Their child has a constantly runny nose and I am using so much Kleenex on just him.

playfelt
06-20-2011, 01:20 PM
I use a lot more wipes on a cloth diapered child because I feel guilty using the diaper to get the inital layers off. I can clean quite a bit just using the diaper itself as the front part is usually relatively clean. Once the heavy stuff is off I use the wipes on the rest. Rarely do I use more than 2 even on the worst runny poops. Make sure you are using them flat and not wadding them.

But on another note, I'm not sure the vent is totally about wipes. It is the whole parent questioning our integrity issue. The parent is making sure you didn't use the wipes on another child or whatever.

I do provide the wipes as part of my fees and don't feel it costs that much. Parents provide the diapers only and diaper cream if they want it used which is put into each child's change bin. Not sure if you are using disposable gloves when you change but you might feel better about it if you did. Personally I don't use them but I know a lot of caregivers that do. I just couldn't justify the cost.

Skysue
06-20-2011, 01:30 PM
LOL I can't stop laughing! 1st of all it maybe ok to be conseravtive if it's your own child but for heavens sakes, I use tons for #2's due to not wanting to get any on me. You are dealing with more than one child and the spread of bacteria is very dangerous!

Plus I use there wipes on there hands and faces, to wipe there change pad after etc...

Please be bold and tell them the importance of wipes for each child or they will walk all over you!

Keep us posted!

Sandbox Sally
06-20-2011, 01:33 PM
This IS ridiculous. If it were my child, I'd want them to use MORE rather than less...

I actually had the opposite happen recently: I told DCK's mom that her poop was so huge that I must have used seven or eight wipes on it, and she looked at me with a raised eyebrow and said, "I use seven or eight EVERY time." So now, I wipe excessively, even after she's clean. As you wish! Hehe.

Play and Learn
06-20-2011, 02:02 PM
In my manual I ask for a plastic - reusable - container that you put the wipes in. They each have their own with their names on it. Then parents usually give me a large ziploc bag of wipes or just the individual bag of wipes that you buy. When I am close to running out, I tell them I need more wipes.

Sometimes I do use the wipes for those extra sticky messes for hands. But I've never in my 8 years of working in childcare came across someone who counts the wipes!!!! This parent is NUTS.

Marie
06-20-2011, 02:03 PM
LOL I can't stop laughing! 1st of all it maybe ok to be conseravtive if it's your own child but for heavens sakes, I use tons for #2's due to not wanting to get any on me. You are dealing with more than one child and the spread of bacteria is very dangerous!

Plus I use there wipes on there hands and faces, to wipe there change pad after etc...

Please be bold and tell them the importance of wipes for each child or they will walk all over you!

Keep us posted!

I also use one wipe of the child's to wipe the change pad. I wonder if I should tell the parents this? I KNOW if I do they'll tell me not to, but I do it because I want it to be clean! I have other kids here to think about and don't want them getting sick and I sure don't want to spread bacteria. Maybe I should just not mention wiping the change pad. They have an issue with everything so maybe it's not even worth it to go there...

Sometimes I wish we could do without having to keep this family. Yes, I do love kids or I wouldn't think about doing this, but I also have to do this for an income for my family. I have been having issues like this since I started with this family, and that was only 6 weeks ago! It's been one thing after another. I have another little boy whose been with me for 7 months and it's been great. The parents are understandable and reasonable with everything. They've said they trust me 100% and never once brought up anything or had any complaints. I just feel like giving the other family their notice. If I knew I could replace that spot soon I would!

Play and Learn
06-20-2011, 02:12 PM
I have been having issues like this since I started with this family, and that was only 6 weeks ago! It's been one thing after another. I have another little boy whose been with me for 7 months and it's been great. The parents are understandable and reasonable with everything. They've said they trust me 100% and never once brought up anything or had any complaints. I just feel like giving the other family their notice. If I knew I could replace that spot soon I would!

Why can't you advertise for a spot? The parents don't have to know who/when it's for. Personally, that's what I would do. Start advertising, and interviewing. Once and if you find that 'golden family', then give crazy family a 2-week notice. And you can fill that spot asap!

I have a 3 strike you're out policy in my home daycare. If they have to question everything that I do, or don't respect my rules, then they DON'T TRUST me, and I personally don't want them coming to my home.

Good luck!

Marie
06-20-2011, 02:26 PM
Why can't you advertise for a spot? The parents don't have to know who/when it's for. Personally, that's what I would do. Start advertising, and interviewing. Once and if you find that 'golden family', then give crazy family a 2-week notice. And you can fill that spot asap!

I have a 3 strike you're out policy in my home daycare. If they have to question everything that I do, or don't respect my rules, then they DON'T TRUST me, and I personally don't want them coming to my home.

Good luck!

I am advertising for that spot, there just seems to be no takers :( I'll keep on looking and hopefully interview with a nice family. I really believe in going with your gut instincts, and mine was telling me they were going to be trouble, but did anyways because they didn't seem THAT bad. It's not like they're ever rude, it's just ALWAYS something with them. As far as the other family I have...we clicked instantly. Both our families get along and I just knew right away. I guess sometimes you just know when you meet someone. It also doesn't help that I am new at this, so whenever the wipe obsessed parents bring up stuff, I wonder if that is something common for home daycares. I could go on and on...I just hope to fill that spot soon!!

Play and Learn
06-20-2011, 02:49 PM
Marie, please just have a backbone! This family may be with you for awhile, but let them know who's boss - it's YOU!

Sending good vibes to get that wonderful family! :)

Marie
06-20-2011, 02:59 PM
Marie, please just have a backbone! This family may be with you for awhile, but let them know who's boss - it's YOU!

Sending good vibes to get that wonderful family! :)


What would you do....bring it up with them or just keep on using what you need and not even bring it up unless they do? I know there is no way I can only use what they ask, so if they do bring it up I'll just have to say I'll use what I use and I can't work around that. Part of me feels like asking them if they've ever changed their own kid's poopy diaper. ONE wipe for that kid's big poop!? If they can do that, I'd like to see because I ALWAYS use more than one!

Play and Learn
06-20-2011, 04:01 PM
I would ask them to leave a container full of wipes with you. If not, that's strike one (for me). I know it might be minor, but it is my business, and there are rules and regulations that you have to follow. If they were in a daycare center, this would have been brought up ASAP.

playfelt
06-20-2011, 05:04 PM
When parents did provide they need to bring a large tub and a bag of diapers. I will not tolerate the diaper bag per day method because too often things get forgotten. I want it under my control and that means I decide how often to change and how many wipes to use etc.

Judy Trickett
06-21-2011, 06:19 AM
Today when I was about to change one of my daycare kids diaper, the parents had put a note on the wipe case telling me to only use one for pee (which I do) and 1-3 for poop. I always go over 3 because this kid poops a lot twice a day, always in the morning. I don't even know how to address this because I think it's absolutely ridiculous. Any suggestions?


When THEY want to take THEIR hand and use it to wipe up some OTHER kids poop only THEN do they get to dictate how many wipes you use.

WTH is wrong with people?????

Marie
06-21-2011, 09:23 AM
I did bring it up at the end of the day with the dad. He just brushed it off and said ''well, his aunt was changing him and she used a lot so we just wanted to make sure you weren't using too much also''. I don't really believe the aunt part but whatever. I was hoping to bring it up with the mom because she's the one who is much more vocal. This morning when she came she didn't bring it up. I have a feeling this isn't the last I've heard but we'll see. I sent the little wipes case empty yesterday because the kid pooped 3 times. I'll just keep using what I need.

mamaof4
06-21-2011, 10:27 AM
wow. and yuck.

Really? wipes?

I see it as these people may be so stingy with wipes- how are they going feel if you raise your rates or have some other charge?

No bueno.

I totally see it as parents trying to control and be 'in charge' it seems like they are very insecure and do not necessarily have the confidence in daycare- which opens a whole other can of worms..

LeeAnne
06-21-2011, 11:13 PM
You could always offer to use cloths and send them home dirty in a bag for them to clean :woot: I'll bet shortly after you'll get a bulk bag of wipes to use! LOL

Judy Trickett
06-22-2011, 06:36 AM
BTW, this is why I work fees for wipes right into my rates. I supply all wipes, sunscreen etc because it's too much work to get out each kids individual container, keep track of them etc etc. I just tell them that I will provide them. My fees are set appropriately to absorb the cost.

Skysue
06-22-2011, 11:38 AM
I still find wipes to be expensive, I supply them as a back up but i have a child that poops like 5-7 times a day and it can get very costly. I ask my parents to supply them and I use who evers when ever I need them. Of course your going to use them on other kids but I'm realistic on when I ask for a new supply.

I go through a box of 500 wipes every 2 weeks!

Marie
06-22-2011, 12:04 PM
Of course your going to use them on other kids but I'm realistic on when I ask for a new supply.



I've honestly never used other kids wipes on anyone but that kid. I only have three kids, including my daughter, so it's pretty easy to keep track of whose wipes are whose. I don't know if the parents think I use their wipes for the others but like I said, I have never done that and I wouldn't. If a kid runs out of wipes that day then I'll use my own and at the end of the day tell the parents they need more. Maybe they just don't trust me...who knows.

sunnydays
06-22-2011, 12:13 PM
I've never used another kids' wipes for someone else either. They each have their own and I tell parents when I am running low. Some kids poop way more than others and use way more wipes...it wouldn't be fair for another parent to be supplying them. The only exception is for outings where I have one bag of wipes rather than carting 5 with me...I just take a little from each kid's supply, but I take more from those who frequently poop at the park (actually I only have one who does that normally).

clep
06-24-2011, 11:08 AM
This is very petty and controlling from my perspective. I have parents bring a package of wipes and a package of diapers at the same time. Parents know that when I ask for diapers the wipes are also a requirement.

Wow. I think I might ask them if their boss counts how many staples they use at work.

waterloo day mom
06-24-2011, 11:25 AM
I get wipes at costco, a pack of 900 for $18.99. That comes out (with tax) to just over 2 cents per wipe. So if I use more than 3 per poop, I'm not really concerned! Parents need to realize (luckily I have wonderful parents who get it) that some things are just not worth arguing over. Especially when you are nit-picking over something so little with the person who is caring for your child!

playfelt
06-24-2011, 12:58 PM
This thread has been interesting. Even though I supply the wipes I have found myself counting how many I use and which child I use the most on.

mom-in-alberta
06-24-2011, 03:11 PM
Laughable... absolutely ridiculous. I agree that this may be about more than just wipes, though. It seems like there may be a trust issue here.
I ask full time parents, and parents of regular/ consistent part-timers, to supply diapers and wipes to keep on hand. Each bag or package is labeled with the family's last name and they are notified when supplies are running low. I have never had anyone question the rate at which I am going through these items. I have a couple drop in part-timers that bring a diaper bag daily, but if there was ever an issue with forgetting supplies, then I would ask for a full container of each to keep here.
And for bum changes: I use a minimum of one per pee-pee diaper and MINIMUM of 2 (I automatically grab 2, and always have for my own kids) for a poopy one. Usually it's 3.

BCParent
06-26-2011, 12:23 PM
LOL! I'd keep a log of wipes and diapers over a week period and give it to them. When they are concerned about the poop stuck on dck's butt and the wicked diaper rash, just calmly explain that unfortunately you had used the 3 wipes alotted to each poop and unfortunately, it wasn't enough but you did the best you could within the means you had to work with. :rolleyes:

clep
06-27-2011, 04:55 PM
LOL! I'd keep a log of wipes and diapers over a week period and give it to them. When they are concerned about the poop stuck on dck's butt and the wicked diaper rash, just calmly explain that unfortunately you had used the 3 wipes alotted to each poop and unfortunately, it wasn't enough but you did the best you could within the means you had to work with. :rolleyes:

Ahaha. That is so funny!!!!! Thanks for that. I needed a good laugh.

Rhonda
07-07-2011, 08:01 PM
Marie, although it is sad, controlling, and frustrating that the family has asked you to limit the diaper wipes it might still work out in the end.

I have a family currently in care that was so controlling in the beginning she told me how to cut grapes for her child, descriped diapering proceedures, and even went as far as describing how to administer antibiotics with a syringe.

Because the dad did pick ups in the evenings, I would get emails questioning me about things. I would then spend so much time trying to politely and professionally respond to her emails. It got to the point one email I blew up. At that point I no longer cared if the family stayed or went as the frustrations weren't worth the money.

After the blow up the mom emailed me an appology, I emailed her an appology and the relationship seems to be a little less stressed. I admit it has only been a few months since care began and I always worry that this family could leave any day, but at least things aren't as strained as they used to be and I don't get the regular evening emails.

When this was all happening, it felt like the mom was trying to control everything, telling me how to run my business, that she was insulting me, it was frustrating and so much more.

Things might still work out with your frustrating/controlling family. As a part of me hopes it continues to work out between my family and myself. I think we (the mom and I) agree that we are too controlling people trying to make things work for the benefit of the child who enjoys being here.

mom-in-alberta
07-08-2011, 12:28 PM
Yup, it can be hard for control freaks (like ME, lol) to accept the fact that someone else's way, although different, is not wrong. And if this is their first child... it makes it all that much worse.