DCG's parents listing house and not telling me?

[Sassygirl]

Hi there, I am new to this forum however have my daycare ad listed on here and have read the forums and have found them extremely helpful.
I am feeling very conflicted with one of my daycare families. DCG has been in my daycare of almost 2 months now. She is/was one of my favourites. Mom came for interview without her and dcg began a month later with no visits, no crying, settled right in.
Mom asked me last week on Wed if I would be willing to keep dcg until 7pm as her work hours have changed. Currently her hours are 6:45-5 hours would change to 9-7 effective June 1. I said NO. 6pm is my absolute max and it then interferes with my family time (I have 4 kids of my own).
We have friends who live on this particular families street and our friends told us last week (conveniently after dcm asked me for the later hours) that their house had a FOR SALE sign out front. I was shocked! I waited until Friday and dcp's didn't say a word. Yesterday our friends told us the sign now says SOLD. I have been livid and not sleeping all weekend. This is completely deceiptful in my opinion. I have every right to know if I am losing this family. I mentioned to dcm this morning (of course another parent arrived basically at the same time so we couldn't get into it)... She said "Oh we didn't tell you last week? We listed last Wed and it sold in 5 days" I said "What does this mean? Is everything okay? Will you still be sending dcg?" She says "I will talk to hubby and let you know" I then said "Could you let me know ASAP as this is going to be a financial strain on my family now and I will need to start advertising and interviewing"
I am SO upset by this breezy attitude. This is my business and family. I am so tempted to tell her to stop sending dcg now.
Thoughts? Thanks in advance.

[mimi]

Yes, this "breezy attitude" is annoying and disrespectfull to you and your business and then to think youare stupid enough to believe her "oh didn't we tell you last week?" Really?
They are leaving. They know the closing date as they have sold their home and I will assume have already know where they will be living. They are just keeping you around until they definitely know they wouldn't need you.
As in my contract, I want 2 weeks notice. However, a little courtesy would be nice to give you more notice since this move is going to happen and they know when so you can agree to an end date and fill that spot.

[Monday 2 Friday Mama]

I know that this won't be a very satisfying answer, but I honestly don't think that there is much more that you can do. I agree 100% with you - it's a terrible way for the family to treat you. :thumbdown: And I can't believe that they would even have the audacity to try the "we thought we mentioned it" *huge sigh here* :rolleyes: That said, I think you'll just have to wait to hear some more details. It's possible that the family is doing a local move and there may be no plans to find a new caregiver. If they are moving further afield and will be taking the child out of your care, I'd say advertise now and feel no guilt about terming them with whatever amount of notice works best for you - clearly this family is focussed on doing what is best for them, so I guess you'll have to look out for your own best interests. Sorry that someone would treat you this way. :glomp:

[Sassygirl]

Its almost like she deliberately asked me last week for the later hours knowing I would say no. She used to be so chatty at the door, bringing me coffee, fruit and veggies for the all the kids and the past week or so has been "All business" so I knew something was up. Was so upsetting to find out from our friends that their house was listed and has now sold.
I posted and ad last night to fill the spot because I know sometimes these things can take time. I am getting mostly calls regarding Sept/Oct spots now. Hopefully I am able to find another family and with the right fit so I am not out too much income.

[playfelt]

It would have been nice yes if they had mentioned something upfront but at the same time if they listed and sold in 5 days then they have been very busy and distracted and it may totally have slipped their minds as in it was no longer something to mention in passing that the house is up for sale. Once sold they are in the position of having to know their plans and yes they need time to digest it all. They may or may not have a house already. Many list thinking it will take awhile and use that time to look for what they want. Their time line has just changed that is all.

I have had families move and not share the news till they know what is happening and that is their right - it is a private matter to them as long as they fulfill the contract terms.

If they find a house where the drive is still convenient then child will stay. If not they will move her.

At the same time all of this is really a mute point isn't it in the sense they asked for a change in hours and you said no so in a sense you have both given notice to each other - just not determined the timeline of when it all happens.

[Monday 2 Friday Mama]

@Sassygirl - I hate it when parents pull this kind of c**p. I was "jilted" by one of my families last week. The family that I'm dealing with "announced" that Gramma will be coming up from South America and caring for their daughter until Mum is off on mat leave with #2. And you knew nothing of this plan when we first met, or during the winter ? I don't have any problem with short term contracts or providing interm care for people, but I would have liked to know from the get go that I would have a space opening up in June. I'm advertising now, and if I'm lucky I'll be able to fill it for September. Some people have no ability to understand another person's position. =(

[Crayola kiddies]

You see the thing is if they tell you early and you start to advertise and you find some one to fill the spot before they are ready to leave it leaves them in a tough spot. If your contract states they need to give you two weeks notice then that's all they are required to do.... Maybe their closing date isn't till mid summer they are not going to risk you finding someone to take their spot before then. One thing you have to remember is people generally only think about what's best for them. Same as if you wanted to term the family ... Generally you wouldn't give notice till you found a new family to fill their spot and after you received payment for the last two weeks so you didn't get stiffed .... So same thing.....

[mimi]

The other posters all have good points on how to perceive this situation. What burns me is what I stated before...........pre tending to think that they had already told you. That tells me honesty is not at the top of their list when dealing with you.

[Dreamalittledream]

Funny you should post this; I too had a family just list their home (unbeknownst to me). At first I was shocked, but realize that sometimes homes do take awhile to sell. Both do drive through the neighborhood on the way to work, so I really doubt the move will effect the current childcare arrangement at all...really hoping not, great family and wonderful DCB (my first one actually...his baby sister will, hopefully,be joining the daycare in the fall as well).

[Sassygirl]

Thanks everyone! You have all been so supportive. I do think dcm asking me last week about the change in hours was my "notice"... She said her hours change June 1 so that is the date I will be going by. I am doing to ask at pickup today what area they are planning on moving to and that will answer my question. I doubt they would continue to drive further East just for ME.
Its her attitude that has been bothering me. Not the fact that they are moving, or the notice period, its the "Oh we didn't tell you..." She knows that she didn't.

[cfred]

Is there a chance that they're just upgrading within the same area? Not likely, but it could happen.

[Sandbox Sally]

I think it sucks that you're losing a family, but I wouldn't share that information with my daycare provider until someone actually purchased my home, either. I'd be worried that they'd drop me from care before I could find another in my new neighbourhood. Honestly, I can see both sides of this, and this is why most of us have a "giving notice" portion of our contract. It'd be nice if a family could give us as much notice as possible before leaving our daycare, but really, if I ask for 2 weeks' notice, I can't be upset when I get two weeks' notice.

[Momof4]

Omigosh, I have to say it, sorry, but she is deceitful and she doesn't value or respect you. You said you are advertising, so fill the space and whether they want to stay or not is not the point. YOU should decide when it's time to let go of clients you CANNOT trust, and this is one of them.

I have a family who are just thinking of selling their home and moving to another part of the city but they have already told me about it and assured me that they are staying with me because they were concerned that I would see the For Sale sign and worry. My daughter lives on the same street as them and I would have been worried. But I also would have asked them immedately when I found out, so I'm very happy that they value me enough to tell me before the fact. YOU deserve families like that too!

[Sassygirl]

Dcm arrived tonight and asked to speak with me. Dcg was last to be picked up so it was fine. She apologized profusely to me. Said they should have told me sooner but didn't expect their house to sell in 5 days and that its been a whirlwind week. She also said that as much as they want to keep dcg in my daycare that they won't be able to. Their last day is June 28 so I now have tons of time to advertise and hopefully fill the spot. Funny thing is that dcm says that the new couple moving in is a young couple and mom is on mat leave. Dcm has referred me and it sounds like this new family will be giving me a call.