View Full Version : What was she thinking?
At pick up we were in my backyard. Dcm comes to pick up her son who I have posted about before. Very big boy (3 yrs old) and his parent kneel before him like he is their God................. .anyway. My exit gate is at the side of my house where the kids are not allowed to play. I am escorting mom and dcb out when she approaches my gate and says " see xxxxx this is how you open it. You stand on your tiptoes (he can then reach) and then you just lift the latch and it is open."
I just stared :woot: at her and then blurted out "are you kidding me?" She replied "Oops, haha, I guess that wasn't the smartest thing to do" and off she went. Now I am going to have to move the latch up after that demonstration. :no:
JennJubie
05-16-2013, 11:27 AM
Wow. Some people have no common sense at all.
dodge__driver11
05-16-2013, 11:55 AM
You know what i would do?? And this sounds totally harsh, but I would have her pay for you (if it costs ) to make any changes to the gate...If it doesn't cost I would simply say "Gates stay closed for child safety and this sill will be taught by me when and if appropriate."
Sassygirl
05-16-2013, 12:10 PM
Unbelieveable! Some people are just CLUELESS!
playfelt
05-16-2013, 12:10 PM
I agree with dodge. Buy a new hook and eye type latch you can put up out of reach and then photocopy the bill and hand it to the mom with a comment like your "lesson" the other day will cost you one new latch to put at the top of the gate or your child will no longer be safe at my house. IF she pays it fine but I would let it go after that in the sense that you got your point across.
Crayola kiddies
05-16-2013, 12:29 PM
what a twit .....charge her for labor to install the thing too ; )
playfelt
05-16-2013, 01:53 PM
Kind of sounds like a passive-aggressive power trip on her part - she knew better for sure. Keep your eyes and ears out for other signs and don't be afraid to speak up and put her in her place the next time she starts something like that.
I would also be speaking to the boy even right in front of him mom to address the rules at your house and remind him that if you ever catch him so much as trying to reach the gate latch that he will be sitting in time out for the rest of the playtime and suffer additional consequences should he not learn from the first incident. It lets mom know again that her actions will cause hardship for the chid potentially and she has no one to blame but herself.
Another good option would be a padlock on the gate with you wearing the key and you can let her in and out at your schedule and is she doesn't like having to wait a bit well she brought it on herself.
Artsand crafts
05-16-2013, 01:55 PM
OMG is people getting dumber??? How can you ensure the safety of her son if she is teaching him how to stop keeping your daycare safe?????? Wow! This is a new one for me...
Skysue
05-16-2013, 02:04 PM
Why move anything he needs to know that it's like a front door etc...he needs to ask you before even thinking of touching it! PERIOD
playfelt
05-16-2013, 02:10 PM
Problem now is because the caregiver knows the child can open it there is the risk that he will and another child might escape while she is busy tending to another child in the yard so for the safety of the daycare the provider needs to change the locks - higher, stronger, type, etc.
One of the things I did when we had the new fence put in was to have two gates put in. One is at the front and one is at the back so parents need to come through two gates to get to the yard, latches are very high but it means from the back of the house no one can get down the side of the house. That is where the gas meter and the air conditioner are.
Perfect ideas ladies. Yes, I will give her the bill for the new latch and tell her I can not take the risk with her son's new found knowledge on how to open the gate.
We are also at odds regarding when her son will be able to wear underwear here. He still pees in his pull ups and does not tell me when he needs to go. Earlier this week, she speaks to her son (again on her knees in front of him - oh hail the mighty one LOL)" maybe this week Mimi will be nice enough to let you wear your underwear" so I just kindly said "sure, as soon as he stops using his pull ups and tells me that he has to go" and I smile. Her voice is always squeaky nice, but she always manages to deliver some little zinger.
Also Skysue, he is a sneaky little guy, so even if I told him the gate would be off limits, that would just egg him on to get to it.
Artsand crafts
05-16-2013, 02:27 PM
This is a hassle for you, too. You are used to have the gate and can relax and turn your back knowing that there is not chance a kid will scape. Now you have to be alert and telling the kid not to open anytime he tries to put in practice his new acquired knowledge. That would made mad!!
Thanks again for your suggestions and comments. My hubby just came home with the new gate hardware and will install today. I will photocopy the bill and give it to her at pick up.
Artsand crafts
05-16-2013, 02:58 PM
Let us know how it goes... that would have drive me crazy!
momofnerds
05-16-2013, 03:18 PM
:eek::ohmy:
Momof4
05-16-2013, 05:24 PM
Oh Mimi, I'm sorry your dcmom is a total moron and I'm glad Dodge made the suggestion for you to charge her for the new lock. Don't take no for an answer! Good luck, and yes I also want to know how it goes!
JennJubie
05-16-2013, 07:28 PM
We are also at odds regarding when her son will be able to wear underwear here. He still pees in his pull ups and does not tell me when he needs to go. Earlier this week, she speaks to her son (again on her knees in front of him - oh hail the mighty one LOL)" maybe this week Mimi will be nice enough to let you wear your underwear" so I just kindly said "sure, as soon as he stops using his pull ups and tells me that he has to go" and I smile.
Give me a break. I'm sure your rule is the same as mine regarding potty issues. Still pees/poops in pants on a regular basis and doesn't tell when they have to go? PULL UPS. End. of. story. There's no way we're going to end up with pee and poop all over our houses!
sunnydays
05-17-2013, 01:36 PM
I think Playfelt is right...passive agressive totally! Talking to the kid about letting him wear underwear...putting it all on you rather than making it the kid's responsibiliy...it's all about you being "nice" and not him learning to keep his pants dry. Sheesh! I do not take kindly to parents talking to a child about what you will or won't do...that just sets you up to be the bad guy.
Crayola kiddies
05-17-2013, 02:01 PM
So what ended up happening?
Sorry for the delay in responding.......... one of those days :)
So when dcm came to pick up her son, I had a copy of the bill for the new latch (has a spring inside which must be moved before the latch can be lifted ) and a labour fee for the install. The bill came to $38.00.
I gave her the bill and explained that the security of the daycare had been breached. I stated I understand it was an innocent error (insert eye roll) in showing dcb how to open the gate, but to also tell him to stand on his tiptoes was a negligent thing to do. I explained my policy with the children is that only adults may touch the door handles and doors unless they are given permission to do so. This is written in my policy book.
She looked a little stunned as she didn't expect a bill, and I did feel a little sorry for her, but the security of my daycare comes first.
I explained since the breach was due to her, she was responsible to pay for a new secure latch so her son and the rest of the children are safe. She then did apologize and gave me two twenties and told me to keep the change. LOL
I thanked her for her co-operation and told her the issue was done with no need to discuss it further.
This morning she came with no attitude (super sweet) and didn't even mention the underwear:p issue.
playfelt
05-17-2013, 03:21 PM
Proud of you Mimi for standing your ground. Bet you could ask anything of that woman right now and get it immediately. Sometimes our worst families can be trained into being our best families.
Momof4
05-17-2013, 04:43 PM
Wow, you handled that perfectly! You should be running a country and maybe we would have world peace! :laugh:
Oh Momof 4, you are hilarious. If you saw my teenage daughter walk all over me you wouldn't say that:laugh:
You know, I am grateful I am a member of this forum. I have learned so much from everyone that I believe I found my voice (and spine) here. Thank you ladies!!
I hope you all have a wonderful weekend!!! I have two extra dollars to spend... Yeah!
dodge__driver11
05-17-2013, 05:21 PM
LOL Mimi :P :P
Awesome! Couldn't have gone better!