Starts crying as soon as I say "quiet time"

[AmandaKDT]

I have a 3 year old dcg that started a week ago. She has adjusted really well, only cried at drop off on the first day then after that has been totally happy from the moment she walks in the door - playing, laughing, smiling, chatty. Then as soon as I say it is time to get ready for quiet time she starts crying and calling for her mommy because she doesn't want to do it. She follows me around while I'm trying to get everyone settled and cries the whole time. Then I put her in her own bed and she starts screaming even louder and calling for her mama.

I decided today to give as little attention to her as possible and see if it helped, which it did. She still cried as she followed me around, but it wasn't as much when she could see I wasn't going to coddle her. She also only cried for about five minutes when I put her to bed, as apposed to the 40 minutes of screaming she did last week. She always ends up falling asleep.

So, I guess I will continue this way and am sure there will be even more improvement. But I was just wondering if anyone else has gone through this same thing and how long it took before they finally got ever it. I don't have a lot of patience for this kind of behaviour, my own 3 year old daughter gets sent to her room when she starts crying when she doesn't get her way.

[JennJubie]

I have a 3.5 yo dcg that also did this. She also pulled some extremely dramatic manipulation of Mom and Dad at my front door during pick up a few times, too. I also have very little tolerance for this kind of behaviour. Taking away attention from this behaviour is a great thing to do, because that's obviously what they want. At 3, 40 minutes of screaming is absolutely unacceptable.

I put my foot down with this girl. It only took a few days with mine to snap her out of that behaviour. Once she realized that she wasn't getting away with it... and had a couple of time outs... she decided to behave appropriately.

[KellyP]

I have a 3.5 yo dcg that also did this. She also pulled some extremely dramatic manipulation of Mom and Dad at my front door during pick up a few times, too. I also have very little tolerance for this kind of behaviour. Taking away attention from this behaviour is a great thing to do, because that's obviously what they want. At 3, 40 minutes of screaming is absolutely unacceptable.

I put my foot down with this girl. It only took a few days with mine to snap her out of that behaviour. Once she realized that she wasn't getting away with it... and had a couple of time outs... she decided to behave appropriately.

That is exactly the kind of emotional manipulation I was referring to in the thread about what kind of provider you are. I am very no nonsense and don't tolerate that kind of thing well either. It doesn't take the kids long to figure out that they cannot manipulate me the way they can their parents.

What I would do OP in your shoes, is not give her any kind of clue or sign that it is rest time. Don't announce that its rest time at all. Don't allow her the opportunity to follow you around and build up to being sad and screaming/crying.

Put her down first before everyone else. Swiftly and quickly. If she fusses. Let her. Don't give her any attention for it.

I am guessing she will figure out really fast that you aren't bothered by her antics and that nap time will come any ways no matter how much she protests.

[Crayola kiddies]

I think I'm similar to KellyP in my approach to things as well. I dont pay attention to these behaviours..... I don't announce things when I know it's going to cause a ruckus ... And I agree ... After lunch get her to go potty and take her right to bed first ....

[Momof4]

Well, the ladies beat me to it. I was going to ask you why you don't put her to bed first to save yourself the trouble? What good is it doing except frustrating you to have her shadow you around crying? Hope she gets over this stage quickly, but if you show her that you don't put up with nonsense hopefully she will learn quickly.

[playfelt]

I was going to suggest the put her down first and quickly with no fanfare. Even if she does fuss it gives her time to get over it before others are down and expecting quiet. At least you won't have to listen to the tears while you settle everyone else.

[AmandaKDT]

Yes, I think tomorrow she will go to her bed first just to avoid her following me and crying.

The other part of it is that she (and my other 2 older ones) are old enough to know that quiet time follows shortly after lunch. So I don't even necessarily have to say anything and she will start her show. That is what happened today.

[JennJubie]

Yes, I think tomorrow she will go to her bed first just to avoid her following me and crying.

The other part of it is that she (and my other 2 older ones) are old enough to know that quiet time follows shortly after lunch. So I don't even necessarily have to say anything and she will start her show. That is what happened today.

I would take her to quiet time the second she starts the dramatics. Take it one step further, show her that her crying and carrying on will only land her in quiet time quicker.

[AmandaKDT]

Thank you everyone for the advice. I am trying to nip this in the bud as fast as possible and will take things one step further tomorrow and put her to bed as soon as she starts crying. Thank you!