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View Full Version : Suggestions regarding odd behaviour in a 5 year old



heartsinit
05-31-2013, 12:00 AM
I am currently watching a 5 year old boy who started with me in March. At the interview I was told that he had sleep apnea issues that they were working on and they explained that this was why the child had such large bags under his eyes and seemed quiet and 'dozy'.

However, during my time with him, I have noticed almost constant head tilting when he gazes at something or speaks. I have also noticed an overall blank or glassy eyed expression almost all the time. He often seems to be caught in a day dream unable to blink. When he does blink, the gazing goes on uninterrupted.
His speech is also quite slurred. Mouth sounds full of saliva and he often goes into a stare, speaks very quietly, and almost rambles a bit before coming out with what he has to say. His words are slowly pronounced and his head cocks from side to side as he speaks. Eye contact is somewhat difficult to make.
He is quite bright and highly attuned to how he feels and able to describe exactly what, why and how he feels, despite the extended amount of time it takes to get to what he is trying to tell you. Intellectually he is witty and sharp. No issues there.

Physically he seems weak, at least compared to other children his age. Getting into the car or putting shoes on, takes about 3 times as long as other children. (I do not wish to complain really- just concerned) He is not ignoring the task at all. he just moves literally like a sloth. Deliberate but painfully slow, to the point that strangers take notice when we are out and visitors to the house almost always comment.

Does any of this sound like something you have heard of before?

The parents, despite being divorced, get along extremely well and the child seems to enjoy a comfortable atmosphere with both of them. Dad is very involved and Mom is especially diligent when addressing her sons emotional needs. Both are professionals with much older children and tell me that the little boy is treasured by all.

It is confusing to me that, in spite of what seems to be extremely attentive parents, neither parent seems to notice the physical and verbal issues. My concern is that there may be something serious happening. At the very least some of my research suggests that the child may need to see an eye doctor to rule out vision issues to explain the constant tilting, and speech therapy should begin asap, as kindergarten begins in the fall and he is still difficult to understand, let alone hear.

Adding to the drama, the parents have recently given notice as the mother has changed jobs and works in a different town making my location in the city much too difficult to manage. I was just working up the courage and gathering enough evidence to bring my concerns to them. Now I am not sure what to do??

I know the easy answer is to let it go and become the teachers problem. I am just not that kind of person/provider/human being. The last time I ignored my gut a child waited a year before receiving vital surgery for a problem that the parents ignored and downplayed. That child suffered all that time and despite everything a part of me blames myself for letting them convince me it was nothing.

Now, given the extent and variety of this child's issues I cannot help but worry that I am letting him down by keeping my mouth shut, just to save myself a possibly awkward moment.

What would you do as a caregiver? What would you accept as a parent on the other side of this discussion?

Thanks for any advice in advance. This one has got me stumped.

playfelt
05-31-2013, 07:07 AM
It for sure sounds like there is a lot more going on than the child is just overtired. The blank periods could very well be epileptic seizure periods and to a certain extent it sounds like a child that has suffered a mild stroke which yes is more common than we think.

One thing you could do is document sort of a point form notes so to speak of things that you have observed and give it to the parents with the idea that you area new on the scene and haven't had the background time with this child and that you were compiling the list to discuss with the parents in the future but are giving it to them now as they leave.

What they do with it will be up to them. Hopefully they read it, start to look for the same things and share the info with their doctor.

JennJubie
05-31-2013, 07:22 AM
It for sure sounds like there is a lot more going on than the child is just overtired. The blank periods could very well be epileptic seizure periods and to a certain extent it sounds like a child that has suffered a mild stroke which yes is more common than we think.

One thing you could do is document sort of a point form notes so to speak of things that you have observed and give it to the parents with the idea that you area new on the scene and haven't had the background time with this child and that you were compiling the list to discuss with the parents in the future but are giving it to them now as they leave.

What they do with it will be up to them. Hopefully they read it, start to look for the same things and share the info with their doctor.

Yes, playfelt I was thinking it sounded like it could be seizures as well. Or if it's not seizures, there could definitely be something medical going on here. I would urge the parents to take him to a doctor to have these things checked. Documenting is a very good idea.

heartsinit
05-31-2013, 09:58 AM
Great idea. I'll keep some notes. I also considered asking a teacher about some of the symptoms and how they might approach a parent?? Can't hurt.

playfelt
05-31-2013, 10:02 AM
If child was staying I would say yes look at other options but since he is leaving anyways I would just hand the parents the notes and wish them well. Sometimes a parent just has to get past the stage of denial - they know the issues are there too. Having them in writing may also help them start to look in new directions or ask their doctor to look.

Skysue
05-31-2013, 12:59 PM
Have the parents got him to a neurologist? It sounds like something with his brain?