Can you believe this?

[torontokids]

Had a parent call me today and ask to use my house as a drop off/pick up point for their child so the parents don't have to see each other (newly divorced). Not only am I not in the business of supervised access visits/exchanges but your child was home sick today with a fever and you want to bring them here just to avoid your ex? Nope, not happening.

Told them "no" of course.

[Artsand crafts]

I'd told them is $50 buck per their 5 min visit hahaha... Of course you are there for whenever they need you to be at home! This people are really loosing it!

[mom-in-alberta]

What the heck? No thanks. :no:
That's got awkward and uncomfortable written all over it!

[mimi]

Hey, maybe we should all offer this type of service - think of the extra income.............. .Kidding
Can you imagine your clients coming to pick up their kids and there are divorced parents squabbling on your front lawn, what a mess that would be. LOL

[torontokids]

I reread my post and realized I wasn't clear. They are current clients of mine and I guess sort of use me as a drop off point already as one may drop off in the morning and when it's the others day with him they pick up. The problem I had was that the kid wasn't even with me today he was off sick (this is why there was a problem as they would have to do their own drop off without me as the buffer). You can't keep your kid home sick then use me as a drop off point. Plus it just felt inappropriate to me. What msg is it sending the kid? If he is with me already for the day no big deal but to drop him off for 5 mins it didn't make sense to me.

[Crayola kiddies]

Oh you've got to be kidding me ???? Seriously..... Grow up !!!! Children raising kids :(

[Robyn]

As a child of divorce I would happily be the in-between so the child doesn't have to feel the tension in the parents, even if they were absent the day of.

Divorce is a horrific thing for a child to go through and I will do everything in my power to shield my dc kids from it.

[playfelt]

If they are current clients then for sure it is easy money. I am guessing the question here is the bringing a sick child to daycare which is against the rules and not the transfer part itself. If it is just for a few minutes then the chances of the chid contaminating the daycare while standing at the door is not likely. I would probably do it but work with both parents so that the picking up parent is parked around the corner or a nearby parking lot and is able to be at my house within 5 minutes of child being dropped off and other parent driving away so child isn't actually taking off their coat and coming into daycare. Child will understand if you just say to them as they arrive that you know what you don't need to take your coat off because daddy called and he is going to be in just a few minutes so you will be all ready when dad comes. Here is a book to look at or a toy to use - then wash before returning for play.

I am also assuming you are being paid for the day anyways so there wouldn't be an additional cost incurred since it isn't an extra service than what you normally do. It is just that child is sick and needs to be restricted to the door - besides he was contagious yesterday so germs are already in your daycare.

[mom-in-alberta]

Ah, I see now.
Nope, still wouldn't do it, I don't think. Simply because logistically, it wouldn't work. It would mean that I would have to sit in my coatroom with said child, leaving all the other children unsupervised for however long. Because I certainly will not welcome a sick child into the daycare, even for 10 min. Not to mention, it wouldn't make sense to have him take off his shoes and coat, then play for 5 min, only to be told it's time to leave.
How very sad that it is impossible for them to even do a kid-exchange without it getting ugly. :(

[mimi]

My exhusband and I argued once in front of our daughter then 3 at her pick up. The look on her face as she watched us argue made us both vow to never, ever do that again and to discuss things without her in attendance. We have never broken that vow though sometimes I had things on the tip of my tongue I wanted to say but held it in because I never wanted to see that look on my daughters face again.

[apples and bananas]

LOL. I actually know someone who had their provider drop off their children at their dads house on Christmas eve just to avoid seeing him.

It happens far too often and it's damaging! Can you imagine how those kids felt? Wondering why their daycare lady had to pick them up at one house and drop them off at another? Kids are smart.

[Artsand crafts]

Ah, I see now.
Nope, still wouldn't do it, I don't think. Simply because logistically, it wouldn't work. It would mean that I would have to sit in my coatroom with said child, leaving all the other children unsupervised for however long. Because I certainly will not welcome a sick child into the daycare, even for 10 min. Not to mention, it wouldn't make sense to have him take off his shoes and coat, then play for 5 min, only to be told it's time to leave.
How very sad that it is impossible for them to even do a kid-exchange without it getting ugly. :(

I would not do it for the same reason and also because I just would not like to get in the middle of my families personal issues.

[torontokids]

Basically the whole thing felt inappropriate to me. They should be able to get it together enough to just hand over their child. I was concerned about getting involved in that way. The drop off's and pick ups now are not an issue as he spends his day with me so it is not awkward for me/the child as just the other parent picks up.

It was much easier to say "no" as he was home sick for the day but even if he wasn't if would have been weird. I think they can do more for their kid if they put on their brave faces and do the exchange. If the parents can be human/normal in front of each other then maybe this child won't feel so many conflicting loyalties.

[Sandbox Sally]

There are many reasons for split parents to avoid one another, ie abuse, emotional turmoil (that can affect the parent to the point of it briefly interfering with their parenting).

Of course, you have every right to refuse to be the drop off point, but I can think of many things that would be beneficial to the child by the parents not having any interaction. I don't think this move is childish, rather, probably a very grown up and responsible decision.

I'd do it in a heartbeat. I am pro-anything that makes life easier for a solo parent. :)