My life is chaos right now

[JennJubie]

So I posted awhile ago that my MIL was in hospital in coma... she had been released home and was getting onto a program to keep healthy. We were touring retirement homes with her as there are ongoing issues with her health that are more than she or any of us can reasonably handle. Everything was going well.... except that this a.m. she was admitted to hospital again comatose, foaming at the mouth and no explanation for any of it. Shes in ICU and critical.

My own mother has been drinking again, and acting every kind of inappropriate that you could imagine. I've had to tell my own mother that she is not allowed in my house or around my children until she agrees to get help and gets herself cleaned up.

To top it all off a very close friend of mine is going through a major life issue, and expects me to console her and drop everything I'm doing if she phones.

I feel very, very drained. The only thing I can handle right now is dealing with my MIL, and making sure my husband and kids are okay. I've already sent out emails notifying parents that I will be closed tomorrow.

[daisy]

That is a lot for you to have on your plate. I am sorry you have to deal with so much. I hope you can get some downtime tomorrow.

[sunnydays]

So sorry you are going through such a hard time. I hope you can make some time for yourself to relax and rest a bit somewhere in all that chaos. Hugs to you!

[gravy_train]

Wow this is a lot to deal with! It sounds like you have taken all the appropriate steps to establish healthy boundaries for yourself and your family with regards to your mother's drinking. My mother also has an issue with alcoholism and I know how heart breaking it can be. I think the hardest thing for me is to mourn the idea of what I want our relationship to be and to try to accept it for what it is (within my boundaries).
You should be proud of yourself that you acknowledged that you needed a break for yourself and that you acted on it. Remember to take care of yourself first.

[mimi]

I am sending you lots of hugs and best wishes for you and your MIL. If what you can handle now is dealing with your MIL and your own family, then that is what you do. Glad to hear you gave your mom boundary's, that is a tough issue to deal with and your friend will just have to wait her turn for your attention until you know what is going on with your MIL. :glomp:

[Other Mummy]

I'm sorry that you are going through this right now. It is extremely draining mentally and physically. Please, please take care of yourself first. I know right now it's probably the last thing on your mind as everyone around you has needs that need to be filled right now.

Do you have your own support group in place? Another good friend, relative, sibling that you could lean on to help you out so that you can focus on your MIL and family. Someone who can grab groceries, clean, make a meal, etc?).

I have an alcoholic father, so I can so relate to your situation with your mother :( Stay strong and don't be afraid to ask others for help!

[playfelt]

That is a lot to deal with for sure but glad that you have been able to prioritize those like your husband and children that need your support while dealing with your MIL and those that need to deal with their own issues for now such as your mother giving you space to focus on what is important to you. I agree that having a support group for you will become so important to take the pressure off the things you need to do that someone else can do for you so that you are free to do the things that require you.

[busydaycarelady]

Sorry you have all this on your plate. That's an awful lot. It's good you can take a day tomorrow, I hope you get a chance to relax a bit. Taking care of yourself and your family first is most important. I hope you get some answers about your MIL.

I have an alcoholic father and have had to deny him access to my home and children before too. I understand how difficult it is. Having definite boundaries with those types if people really helps I've found.

I hope things look up for you right away!

[Momof4]

Big hugs, that's a lot for you to handle. I hope your clients are understanding and supportive until you can get everything under control. You have your priorities straight, you just obviously don't have enough hours in the day. For heaven sake, don't forget to take some time to take care of yourself every day or you will lose your mind.

[JennJubie]

Thanks everyone. I have my Aunts to lean on, they're amazing and they're always just a phone call away.

[SecondAve]

Praying for your entire family during this extremely difficult time. I also have a father that is an alcoholic. We no longer live in the same city, so I haven't had to set up daily boundaries although in the past I have. So I can relate to how difficult that situation can be.

I've noticed that many of us providers have a parent who is an alcoholic. I wonder if our ability/desire to care for others might stem from this. I was always a mediator between my parents and spent a good portion of my childhood caring for my siblings. A bit off topic I know, but I couldn't help but think of it reading all the replies.