Anyone had to call CAS?

[Teagansmom]

Hi, I'm new to this forum.....it's fantastic, I'm so happy I came across this site.

I was just wondering if any providers had suspicion of abuse or neglect and had to report it?

[Judy Trickett]

Yes. I have had to call CAS before. I'm sure I don't have to tell you that if you call CAS on a family in care it gets real ugly, real fast. I mean, REAL ugly. :blink:

As a dcprovider you are a mandated reporter. So, all you have to do is suspect something is wrong and report it. It is not your job to KNOW something is wrong - just have justified suspect of it.

[mamaof4]

As luck would have it no. But I had my neighbor call on us. We were friends with that neighbor now we are no longer speaking. Which sucks.

I was in the hospital on IV antibiotics and my husband was working (from home in the basement), he had told the kids they could not open the front door or go outside. Little neighbor girl comes over (6 years old) and talks to my 5 year old through the front window (my 5 year old has a severe speech delay), 6 year old runs home to tell her mom what was said, I guess my child told the 6 year old that they couldn't come out b/c daddy was working and I was at the hospital. Neighbor NEVER called or came over to see what was happening and instead called. A while later the police came by and asked to speak to my DH (WHO WAS HOME THE WHOLE TIME) and he explained what had happened. The next day- per the law we had a visit from a case worker. It was a nightmare. A huge nightmare. My kids were so upset and stressed out. My kids have lost their neighbor playmates, I lost a neighbor friend, heck we had keys to each others homes, we carpooled.

My advice is this, double and triple check, don't do what my neighbor did.

[mimi]

Mamaof4, if this neighbor had really been a friend, she would have come to your house to see if your child was o.k. if she truly thought your child was home alone. Do not mourn her loss, she unbeknownst to you probably had a bee in her bonnet about you or your hubby and chose to get back this way. I am sorry you and your kids had to go through this.

Myself, no I have not had to call CAS. I would though if I suspected abuse. If one of my dc kids comes in with a bruise I'm suspicious of I always carefully ask how they got it. This has happened about 3 times and the explanations along with the childs behaviour were normal (to me)

[playfelt]

I also would not call unless I was actually sure. I would be doing a lot of talking to the family and based on what I knew about them and what was going on in their lives. I have good relationships with my families in the sense they tell me things and share when there are issues at home that might be effecting the child.

I also have families that let their kids be kids so there is always a new bruise the next day and they often go home with one from outside play. But there are bruises that are from play and bruises that are from abuse and in a way you can tell the difference.

Personally I would probably contact a relative to talk to them first before calling CAS because of the hassles involved unless I thought the child was in imminent danger in which case I would call CAS to come to my house to get the child before parent. When they fill out my forms I ask that one of their contacts be a relative for medical/family reasons.

In 28 years I have never called CAS and never dealt with a family I thought was abusing their child. Some for sure had questionable parenting skills but not to the point of abuse.

[playfelt]

One of the reasons I provide the food and 2% milk. Parents are told they may send for the infant and that I will top up as needed. If they want homo milk or formula they send but if I run out I will use 2% milk. That way I can give the nutrients needed. Too often parents don't change what they are doing with the child as they get older.

[mimi]

Thank goodness this little guy had you to look out for him Teagansmom. I hope his parents will properly care for him now.

[Fun&care]

Good for you for calling CAS. What you described definitely sounds like either neglect or sheer stupidity...hope this child gets help.

[mimi]

Oh Teagansmom, so very sorry to hear of your Mom's diagnosis. I hope her treatment is successful and she is better very soon. BBB is not stupid. They know that some reports are falsely made due to a customer not getting their way with a business. Can you call them to see if you have been reported? Good idea to check to see if she is maligning you on line, but if you don't see anything for a week assume she might not and forget about her. Will the CAS worker let you know how the little guy is doing? Don't fret anymore, they will make sure he has good care and you must now concentrate on your Mom. Take care.:glomp:

[Teagansmom]

Khjkhvhvkjjvkjhhkjvk jhvhv

[mimi]

5 years ago a good friend of mine was diagnosed with stage 2 lung cancer as well. She has been cancer free for 31/2 years and has started her own business. She is 52. :thumbsup:

[Momof4]

Very sorry to hear about your Mom's diagnosis but my Mom had a mastectomy at age 42 and she is now 76. It takes a positive attitude, lots of pain and agony to get through the treatments, but there is no stopping my incredible Mom. I hope your Mom does well through all she is facing now.

I want to ask you if you will be screening better at your interviews now that you have had this experience. Personally, I think you did the right thing in calling CAS. At the very least, they will educate the parents and help them to realize that their son is as malnourished as a 3rd world starving child. So very sad. Sorry you had to go through that, but I'm glad you were able to save this child.

I'm sorry, but I never would have accepted that child into care. I have learned to question the parents at the interview about food, behaviours, parenting philosophies, and so much more. I'm not sure how long you have been in business but the interview is where you weed out all these things. A 10 month old child coming into my care is always eating table food in very small chunks. I haven't had to feed any of them any kind of puree.

As you said, you learned a lesson.

[Teagansmom]

Ljubljana,,hjbhb

[2cuteboys]

I'm sure it's very stressful for you!
On the bright side, at least you can have a "fresh start" in a new city and won't be worried about seeing this family anymore.

I'd imagine CAS would support you. You can't expect that people be mandatory reporters if they aren't going to get some kind of help on the other side. It sounds like the family is probably very angry and wanting to do something to "get back" at you. I hope the powers that be can see through to that and you won't end up losing more than you already have.

Good luck!

[mimi]

Hi Teagansmom, it is wonderful that your Mom is doing so well. Congratulations to her!!

I am sorry to hear about the lawsuit. I wouldn't worry much about the dc family's lawsuit. They have to prove malice intent and of course there was none. You were doing your job as a daycare provider and reporting your suspicions. The legal system and CAS may not be perfect, but they can sure spot a bogus claim and a disgruntled person who was reported.
I am wondering if you can ask for lawyers fees when you win your case against this family.

If I were you I wouldn't give up on Daycare as your business. It sounds like you are a wonderful caring provider and our industry needs to keep providers like you. Good luck with your new home and please let us know what happens. :)