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View Full Version : Mouthing everything - suggestions for deterring?



gravy_train
11-18-2013, 10:54 AM
I have a 15 month old who puts everything he picks up in his mouth. I mean everything. If I don't catch him right away and remove the item he chews on it unti lI take it out of his mouth. He has also started biting the other children in my care. I know that some degree of mouthing items is normal and healthy and can also be a sign of teething but this is far more excessive than any mouthing and chewing that I've seen with my other kids. It is also really gross - there is drool everywhere and it is really hard to constantly sanitize and clean everything that goes into his mouth since *everything* goes into his mouth.
Other than telling him that we don't put toys in our mouth, what can I do to curb this behaviour? Or is this one of those things that I just have wait out and will subside on its own?
Thanks!

2cuteboys
11-18-2013, 12:16 PM
For one of my dcbs it seemed to just be a unconscious thing to put things in his mouth if he wasn't actively playing with them. For him I started making him out the toy he mouthed in the sink or dirty toy bucket, and he lost it until I got around to cleaning it. He figured it out, but still chews on his fingers... Yuck.

15 months might be a bit young though you might just have to continue with reminders until they're able to connect losing toys with putting them in the mouth.

mickyc
11-18-2013, 01:21 PM
For myself I just tell the little ones in a stern voice NO that is Yucky! and constant reminders. It usually results in the child taking the toy out of their mouth.

5 Little Monkeys
11-18-2013, 01:32 PM
I have this issue too. I do the "toys do not go in our mouth", "yuck, we don't do that" etc. I used to just take the toy away and put it in a bucket and at the end of the day wash those ones. Now I make the child take it to the sink instantly. I clean them as I get to them so sometimes they are without them for an hour or more. I'm hoping that it soon registers and they will stop.

I find they do it more when they are teething. The play food is always being put in their mouth even though "we just pretend" is said a million times a day lol. Unfortunately, I think it is just something kids do.

JennJubie
11-18-2013, 01:38 PM
I have one the same age. Everything goes in the mouth. He mouths my furniture as well. If any of the other children are at the same level as him, he will go for their noses. Put his mouth right over their noses :ohmy:

Secondtimearound
11-18-2013, 02:30 PM
I'm not sure !! But anxious to find out too !!! I had two dck that put everything in their mouths !!!! I'm guessing its teething too but I'm doing endless cleaning !!!

DayHomeMama
11-18-2013, 02:54 PM
I'm in the same boat, and with older kids too, like 4 year olds! ICK.
I know it's a habit, and I'm actually going to do up a memo about consistency bewtween home and day home regarding mouthing toys, books and chewing, sucking on fingers. I find it disgusting, more so with the older dhc, that they suck their fingers and then go around touching everything, especially with cold season. :(

FunnyFarm
11-18-2013, 03:37 PM
UGH!!! I have one too, but that's because she is addicted to her soother. So I guess I'm not the best, but I just leave the soother in to save my toys and the ick factor. Parent's don't have an issue with me doing that, but I do ask them to try and remind dcg at home that toys don't go in the mouth. blech. LOL

mom-in-alberta
11-25-2013, 03:19 PM
Yup, another one of my "things". Our motto is ONLY FOOD GOES IN OUR MOUTH.
We don't suck on our thumbs, fingers, toys or anything else. Even little ones (10-12m) can start to understand that. With consistency and repetition, they will get it. Eventually. LoL
My own daughter was really bad for that, even at almost 2. So I gave her a specific toy that she could chew on/ mouth. I would replace and say "you can only do that with THIS toy". It got to the point that she would run over and find it, just to put in her mouth. But that was ok, because she wasn't sucking on everything else in sight. I have heard of others pinning or clipping a small toy to the child, with the same intention. If they are going to chew, it is on a specific item.

gravy_train
01-31-2014, 08:39 AM
So, I've been following this advice and repeat a million times a day that toys don't go in the mouth, take the toy away, etc. Well, this little guy is now 18 months old and the mouthing has continued to the point where most of my books have been ruined because he chews them, the playpen has chew marks, he chewed through a teething necklace that was supposed to be indestructible, he has even started chewing on his own legs or arms, and of course, he has started biting the other children in the daycare now. He also started shoving his fingers far back into his throat so that he triggers his gag reflex - a few days ago he made himself vomit. I am really struggling with how to deal with this. As you probably know, having to tell a parent that their child was hurt while in your care is a really awful feeling. I spoke to the mom about it earlier this week (after the vomit incident) and mom says it must be because he is teething - same thing she has been saying for about 5 months. I am going to speak with her again today and stress the severity of the issue and I would really like to give her some things to work on with him over the next few weeks to teach him to stop but she claims he never does this stuff when he's at home (yeah, right). He seems to bite when another child sits too close to him, plays with a toy he is playing with (not taking it away, but with blocks or lego for example), or sometimes it is when the other children are playing with something together, he will approach and attempt to bite. he seems to bite less when he has a soother attached to his shirt but I have a no soother except when transitioning or at naptime rule. I also think that at 18 months old he should know what is appropriate to chew on (ie FOOD) and what isn't (ie everything else) - within reason of course.
I have started saying a firm, "no biting, that hurts your friend" and i put him in his playpen. when i have to leave the room he goes in his high chair or playpen, but it really isn't changing anything and he is still biting or five times a day.
What should I do? What are some things I can ask the parents to do at home to help me out here?

KingstonMom
01-31-2014, 09:14 AM
If it were me and I have been trying to get dcb to stop this habit for some time to no avail and have spoken with the parents about it...maybe give them a warning and explain that there may need to be some reimbursement for books and toys he has ruined due to the drooling and chewing on them. that would tick me off. I think you are doing everything right and I think 18 mos is old enough to not eat a book!! I have a 17 mon old in care who had this habit too but after a month or two of my e reminding him at about 14/15 mos he stopped doing it almost completely.
As far as biting friends go, this should be punished wioth a time out/loss of privilege and documented to show the often occurrence of it.
Maybe there should be a termination date threatened if the behaviour is not curbed. Say 3 weeks.

Crayola kiddies
01-31-2014, 09:15 AM
Perhaps your not saying it with a stern enough face and voice... Every time he puts something near his mouth say "NO NOT IN YOUR MOUTH" loud enough to startle him...also speak to the parent again and say "I need you to stop him from putting things in his mouth at home .... Anything and everything ... Toys books fingers everything but food .... This is not teething this is a habit and a bad one .... He is now biting other children and it needs to stop .... Other parents are not happy their child is being bit and rightly so....I need to see some improvement within two weeks and if we are both stressing it all day I'm sure that will be no problem...." And if she is not willing to work with you then hand them their walking papers because you have an obligation to keep the other children safe and they are not safe if they are being bitten ..... You run the risk of losing your other families if you don't put a stop to this kid

jammiesandtea
01-31-2014, 09:34 AM
Perhaps your not saying it with a stern enough face and voice... Every time he puts something near his mouth say "NO NOT IN YOUR MOUTH" loud enough to startle him...also speak to the parent again and say "I need you to stop him from putting things in his mouth at home .... Anything and everything ... Toys books fingers everything but food .... This is not teething this is a habit and a bad one .... He is now biting other children and it needs to stop .... Other parents are not happy their child is being bit and rightly so....I need to see some improvement within two weeks and if we are both stressing it all day I'm sure that will be no problem...." And if she is not willing to work with you then hand them their walking papers because you have an obligation to keep the other children safe and they are not safe if they are being bitten ..... You run the risk of losing your other families if you don't put a stop to this kid


^^^^ YES. Exactly THIS.

gravy_train
01-31-2014, 09:39 AM
i agree completely - at his age it's a habit he has developed and i am risking losing my other families because of this. he has broken through the skin a couple of times, and even if not, i am havign to tell the parents of the other children almost daily that this happened. my son had a brief (month long) hitting and pushing frenzy here but with consistency it has stopped - this issue has been going on for months.
i think they might be giving into his every whim at home so he doesn't have the chance to get frustrated or angry (therein learning the appropriate response). i like how you phrased how i should talk to the parents, crayola - i will definitely incorporate that into my chat. i think they need to stop brushing this off as teething and take it seriously.

Crayola kiddies
01-31-2014, 12:02 PM
i agree completely - at his age it's a habit he has developed and i am risking losing my other families because of this. he has broken through the skin a couple of times, and even if not, i am havign to tell the parents of the other children almost daily that this happened. my son had a brief (month long) hitting and pushing frenzy here but with consistency it has stopped - this issue has been going on for months.
i think they might be giving into his every whim at home so he doesn't have the chance to get frustrated or angry (therein learning the appropriate response). i like how you phrased how i should talk to the parents, crayola - i will definitely incorporate that into my chat. i think they need to stop brushing this off as teething and take it seriously.
..... Notice how I didn't say the word termination .... If you were to say "I need to see an improvement In two weeks or I will have to terminate " the parent automatically gets their back up and sometimes its a knee jerk reaction to pull the kid .... By saying if we work together we should be able to put a stop to it ..... That makes the parent more receptive then the threat if termination ..... Even if the parent were to say "what if there's no improvement after two weeks" I would just say "let's just stay positive "

Busy ECE mommy
02-01-2014, 08:31 AM
I see big red flags here. Yes biting is pretty typical for children when language skills are not fully developed yet, but the severity concerns me. When I worked in a centre, a bite that broke the skin was deemed a "serious occurence" and the Ministry was called in to investigate. Serious stuff.
We used chewy toys/necklaces for biters, and it went everywhere with them, including outdoor time. When I hear that the child is also biting self and gagging himself, that tells me there are probably oral processing issues going on, that are beyond the typical toddler biting phase. This is not a teething issue, due to the severity and length of time the behaviour has persisted. I imagine the other parents are very frustrated as well. Mom and Dad need a chat about the severity of the behaviour and definitely a consult with an Occupational Therapist to assess these issues. I personally would give it a probation timeline for them to seek outside help, and see some improvement, or find care elsewhere. The stress on yourself and the other children must be so draining.

Samantha33
02-01-2014, 03:09 PM
gravy_train, I've only ever had one boy in my care (I've had my daycare for way over 10 years) and he was as you described, although he never mouthed anything, just a lot of biting. Even the same age when he started biting. I tried working with the parents (only child but they said he never does this with his cousins). I tried to get him to stop biting for 7 months. Yes 7. Why you ask. Because his parents were Golden. There was not anything wrong with them. They were fantastic and so was J. One day he bit another child and broke the skin. I "had" to terminate that day. What was I thinking trying to work that long with a child who could really do harm. Please don't let this go on to long. He is the only child I have ever terminated. Ever. So I don't take terminating lightly. I believe their is good in everyone. But this one bad thing was the deal breaker after trying for so long. I hope you get some good advice on things to try to get him to stop. In the meantime. Shadow.

sunnydays
02-01-2014, 06:40 PM
I have found for some kids it helps to clip a teething ring to their shirt so they have something they are allowed to mouth and always have it handy. It helps with the mouthing because you can redirect them to it and it can help with biters as well especially if they are biting for oral stimulation.

playfelt
02-02-2014, 11:04 AM
I have a 2 1/2 year old that still has a soother during the day and while I hate it and it makes him drool all over his shirt - without it he bites other kids and sucks on whatever toy he picks up. The soother becomes the solution in this case rather than the problem.

sunnydays
02-02-2014, 04:06 PM
I agree Playfelt. I had an 18 month old who started biting like crazy to the point that I was thinking of terminating even though I really liked the family. What finally worked was letting him have his soother for a few weeks. He couldn't bite with the soother in his mouth and it kept everyone safe. After that we were able to ween him of the soother and he stopped biting :) Sometimes it is the least of two evils...

gravy_train
02-03-2014, 10:35 AM
Thanks for the advice everyone! I thought about clipping a teething ring or soother to his shirt but I really think he needs to be taught not to bite when he's frustrated. I will see how the next few weeks go and then re-visit the soother idea. I agree that it's a serious issue and I'm not sure if the parents really understand that. I spoke with them on Friday and outlined a plan to deal with his biting. It involves us teaching him that only food goes in his mouth and then also redirecting his hitting/biting when he gets frustrated. I gave the parents some homework and they seemed on board although mom did mention a few times that she wish his teeth would just come through already ... Which leads me to believe that she is exclusively blaming teething. I'll let you guys know how it goes though and in the meantime he is not getting out of my sight, even for a second.

gravy_train
02-03-2014, 10:37 AM
@cathy - are you saying that you think he was a biter because he is a boy?