Gifts...open at dc or home??

[5 Little Monkeys]

I buy Christmas gifts for my dck's and I am wondering how other dcp's handle giving them out.

In the past, I have given them on their last day here before the holidays at the end of the day. They take them home and open whenever. The parents always text me saying their child liked it and some have even sent pictures of them opening them or them playing with the gift :) I have done this because I figure it is less stress for me because I am sure they will want to play with them right away and I don't want pieces lost, broken or fought over since I give different gifts to each child depending on their age and likes. They also tend to leave on different days.

This year I am considering letting them unwrap them at our Christmas party on the last day that everyone is here which will be next Tuesday. However, I don't want the parents who are still here for the following 3 days to feel that they need to buy me a Christmas present if they weren't planning on it.

What do you do and why?

[playfelt]

I send them home to be opened with the family but I always send them home so there is a weekend left for them to shop - just in case they might want to buy me something too.

[5 Little Monkeys]

I don't want them to feel they need to buy me something in return though. If they buy me something that is awesome and appreciated but I don't want a gift just because I gave their child one. I don't think the gift would have the same meaning if I knew or thought they gave me one just so they didn't feel bad that they didn't think to buy me one on their own. Does that make sense?

[mimi]

I'm just getting over the fact that the parents text you and send pictures of the child opening the gift!!! I give the kids gifts because I want to and if gives me pleasure doing so. The thank you is not a huge deal though acknowledgement is when a gift is given.

My experience with parents is that they rarely mention the gift the next time I see them. These are educated and other wise pleasant well mannered folk who consistently do this. A couple will come in and tell me their child really loved the toy/book which is appreciated, but like I said, most behave like it never happened!?!?

[5 Little Monkeys]

Mimi, I know what you mean. I love giving gifts and do it often throughout the year for their birthdays and holidays such as valentines, easter and halloween. I have never had a parent who didn't say thank you. Some of them gush over it a little much actually lol. I had given bath toys to a dcb and his older sister and the mom sent me the cutest pic of them in the tub playing with them. That was awesome! I should say though, that my past group was all older mom's and they were all professionals and so polite and classy(for the most part lol). This group is extremely young moms and 2 are still in school so I am not sure what to expect from them this year. I think I may let them open their gift on their last day here all together. I do this for the children not the parents and I would like to see their reaction :) Is that selfish of me? I sometimes wonder if the parents want to open it with them so they see their reaction too?

I let them open their birthday present at daycare because we have a little party for them and I do think it's important for kids to realize that it is a child's bday and we don't all get gifts on their special day so I use it as a teaching opportunity. The little gift bags I make up for holidays I show them at last snack and than put them in their bags as it's usually contains a few treats and I don't want the sugar high LOL

Mimi, hopefully your next group of parents will be a little more appreciatative. Even though we do this for the children, it is just polite manners to say thank you for giving their child a gift.

[chill.winston]

I got them to open their gifts at daycare but I think this was a rookie mistake lol... It was a big gong show! Everyone was all over eachother's presents. Next year, I'll be sending them home, wrapped.

[5 Little Monkeys]

LOL chill.winston....... that is my fear!! Now I'm unsure again lol

[mimi]

I can just picture the bedlam chill.winston!!! Too funny.

[mickyc]

I always send them home and that is what I will do again this year.

I have to say I don't really remember if a parent has ever said thank you for their gift I send home to their child. Hmmm..I will have to pay more attention this year and see what happens.

[Secondtimearound]

I am sending mine home with a special goody bag !! It's a little awkward because I don't want them to feel they have to run out and get something for me !!!!!

[5 Little Monkeys]

I'm shocked that there are parents who wouldn't even say thank you!! However, like I said, this group is young so maybe I will experience that this year.

I'm still undecided as to what I am going to do. Plans have changed and one child is leaving Tuesday for 2 weeks and the others are leaving Friday for 2 weeks. We will do our main Christmas party on Friday now.

[bright sparks]

I give my gifts at the end of the last day to take home. If a parent gives me a gift I thank them very much and put it under my tree, I don't open it in front of them and if they ask me to I explain that I open all my gifts on Xmas morning and they are okay with that. I do have some simple guidelines for Xmas daycare gift giving at this time of year though....This is my honest opinion that's all.

If you have some kind of strategy....don't give a gift.
If you have any kind of expectation e.g, acknowledgement, a thank you or a gift back....don't give a gift.
If you feel obliged...don't give a gift.

Giving gifts is not about anything other than giving and any emotions you feel relating to it are down to you. If giving a gift makes you feel happy and gives you the warm and fuzzies, that is down to you. If you feel resentful, or frustrated that is also on you, not the parents.

If you have no expectations of others then you will never feel let down.

[5 Little Monkeys]

I understand what you mean brightsparks. I have opened a few in front of the parents and I haven't opened a few just because it was a bad time (busy with other children etc). A friend and I were talking about this (opening gifts in front of the person who gave it) and she said it's bad etiquette to not open it lol. I sorta agree with her. When I give a gift I want the person to open it so I can see their response so I can tell if they like it or not. Most people will say they like it but their reaction is the truth and I want to know if I should buy something similar for them in the future or not.

I buy the children gifts because I love giving gifts and I think Christmas is for children. I would love to see their reaction when opening it which is why I am considering it. However, I know there will probably be some chaos to it too.

Thanks for all your input ladies!!

[elysefloyd]

I send them home on the last day. Some parents let the kids open them and some don't. I am okay with either. I also send home a wrapped gift for the parents from the child, I take pictures during the year and put them in a small album so parents can see some of what we do. All of my parents love this and look forward to receiving it each year.

[playfelt]

I don't open the gifts from the kids in front of them either. I accept it and say oh we will put this under our tree for Christmas. I don't want to open it in front of the kids as part of it is often candy or special cookies I have no intention of sharing, lol. It is confusing at the door and I also want time to enjoy the opening and reading the card and really reading it in front of the parent can also make them a little self conscious too in the sense that we write things we can't bring ourselves to say.

I give the gifts for them to open at home. Some families open as they get, others save all gifts to open on Christmas so I leave it up to parents to do as they wish.

[torontokids]

We are having our Christmas party on Thurs and all the parents will be there. Santa will be coming and the gifts will be handed out to the kids at the party "from Santa." I think in this scenario it would be cruel to tell the kids not to open them. I think when they get handed out I'll just direct the kids to ask their parents and let them decide.

[mom-in-alberta]

My daycare kids are receiving thier gifts as they go home on the last day that they will be here. Some families have the rule that NO gifts are opened in advance of the "big day", and I will respect that. We are not having a party, exactly, because there was no one day that all (or even most) of the kids are here this week. If I had a shindig with Santa, I would probably expect them to open them, though. So I will just hand them the bag as we hug and say goodbye for a couple weeks.
I have received gifts from 4 different families already, and i did not open them right then and there. In fact, I am super awkward about receiving stuff, LoL. But I texted them later and said thank you very much.

[5 Little Monkeys]

Mom in Alberta...I am also super awkward when opening up gifts. I feel like I have to act super excited LOL. Actually in June, I had 2 moms arrive at the same time and both had gifts as they were leaving my daycare. It was the end of the day, we were visiting in the living room as their kids were the last ones. The first one I opened, her son was helping me and was really into it. It was a oil scented thing(I'm not really sure as I don't use that stuff) and her son took it to his mom right away lol. I said thank you, I couldn't wait to smell it. Than I opened the card from the other mom and there was a $100 gift card for the Keg and I feel like I gushed over it too much. I felt like such a tool afterwards lol. I am not a good gift receiver, I much prefer giving! haha.

I think I have decided to send their gifts home on their last day at the end of the day, wrapped. I send home the parent's gifts from their child than too.

[Daisy123]

I open gifts from the kids after everyone leaves. I've had kids in tears because they hadn't brought me something too and they were feeling very left out.. I make sure to thank the parents right way, put the gift under the tree and then send thank you cards out later.
Gifts from me to the children and gifts that the kids make for their parents go home at the end of the last day because I don't want the parents to feel obligated to get me something. The kids are always so excited to have something "secret" to put under the tree for mom and dad.