View Full Version : What should I do ???

06-04-2014, 08:44 PM
I was so upset today and after going through it over and over, I need advice on what to do.
I have a 1 year old boy in my care for about 2 months now. This boy is an only child and I have been his first daycare placement. He has only had mom and his grandmother watch him since he was born. I had a really hard time and still do with him adjusting. The problem that I am having is, he came to me with a very different schedule that I have and of coarse I had explained to both parents during the interview that this needed to be changed and they would need to follow it at home as well.
Just to give you an idea.
His wake up time was 9 am and have breakfast.
He would nap again at 12, and have lunch at 2pm
and than have a late nap at 5pm
I had many difficult long crying day which made me decide to take it little by little.
We started with half days and than followed the full day. He finally was getting settled, when he suddenly got a virus and parents went by what he wanted to do. He had slept all day tuesday and today woke up crying and mom let him sleep in. He arrived to daycare at 10 30. Today was really bad day for him he wanted to nap at 12! Impossible when I had to feed the other children. I told dad at pick up time that he was off his schedule and this is the reason of his bad day. He upright told me that he wasn't going to adjust his schedule because he is use to it. That he was still a baby and was ill. I suggested that he than should only come back when he is fully recovered and back on track and ready to confront my schedule. Dad than had the nerve to say that I couldn't handle more than 2 baby's !!
What ??? I felt so disrespected at that point. I don't think the parents are fully aware that children need routine and definately a schedule to follow. Especially if you are planning to have them in a daycare. If feel they want me to be attentive to his need, as he demands. In that case they should hire a nanny. I told him I needed this evening to think things through and that I would be calling them tomorrow...... Any suggestions ???

5 Little Monkeys
06-04-2014, 08:58 PM
I would talk to them in a very non confrontational tone and explain that in the best interest of their child, they will either need to be on board with your schedule or they will need to find alternate care, perhaps a nanny. I would explain to them that in daycare, all the children need to adjust to the routine because you are only one adult caring for multiple children and for this to succeed and be safe, a consistent routine is needed. If they don't like this approach that is of course their right and by all means you will not be offended if they decide to go with another provider.

Be firm that these are the 2 choices you can see for them but allow them to make the decision. If they were to honestly think about it, they would see that they are doing their child a disservice by allowing him to call all the shots. Most children thrive in a structured routine or at least with a consistent one. Being in multiple child care, they must understand that allowing all the children to do what they want when they want just isn't possible.

06-04-2014, 09:04 PM
It sounds like the kid does have a schedule, it is just very different from what you are doing. In my opinion, he is not a fit for your daycare if the parents don't want to support you and your program. Also, he should not be coming if he is ill and you need to turn him away at the door if sick.

I would chat with them and ask if they are willing to accommodate the schedule, if not then give notice. I have it in my contract that children don't come later then 9 to avoid the whole sleeping in issue.

06-04-2014, 09:41 PM
5 little monkeys, I have explained that to them almost everyday since he has started with me. The parents seem to understand it, but everyday mom would either show up late, or put him to sleep late in the evening because of some get together. I have seen the tremendous changes in him and I know he is very capable of adapting to my schedule, but it almost seems like the parents aren't willing to do it.

5 Little Monkeys
06-04-2014, 09:55 PM
That's tough....if the parents understand where you're coming from and your reasons but still don't want to follow your suggestions than there's not much more you can do IMO. If their routine is just Too different from yours and is disrupting the other children and your program than I think you have 2 choices....find a way to Deal with it or terminate them.

Good luck!

06-05-2014, 04:12 AM
Maybe you need to have a cutoff time for arrivals. I deal with contracted hours, so don't accept clients who need to arrive later in the day. But I do have it stated that I expect all children to arrive no later than 8:30. It gives each child a chance to adjust before we start our activities. It also means that each child will be up and fed and here and ready to be on my schedule for the day.

I always stress in interviews what our daily schedule looks like and that, while I do have some flexibility, that this is a group setting and I cannot accomodate individual needs. So for example, a 5 pm nap. I do encourage them to follow our schedule but understand if they cannot. The way I look at it is this: I have to do what works for our group just as they have to do what works for them. I would always frame this as in the best interest of their child and helping them adapt to the daycare setting because it really is.

I would enforce a drop off time. They don't arrive, they don't get care. Period. That will 'force' the parents to get on your schedule and the little one should follow right along. Good luck!

06-05-2014, 08:58 AM
Sounds like you may need to put them n a probationary period. Give them 2 or 4 weeks to get their schedule to correspond better with yours. If they have not made the needed changes then he'll need to find care that better suits their schedule.

Sounds like they either need a bit of a reality check to make this work or to move on to something they have more control over. You risk losing them but if you don't make it very clear what you need from them you will not get it.

Sometimes it just isn't a good fit. Seems sad because it sounds like with some simple changes on their end this little guy would be thriving in your care...but the parents need to be on board for that to happen.

06-05-2014, 09:20 AM
I totally agree with everyone's suggestions. I would tell them that they need to work with your schedule.

06-05-2014, 12:45 PM
Is mom back to work yet as in has to get up at a certain time and wake child if necessary to come to daycare. That will for sure help child get onto your schedule. Also it is possible to have two kids on totally different schedules and especially when they are little since they don't play with each other anyways. If the one needs to sleep at noon then just put them into bed and let them, second baby goes down and first one gets up to eat lunch. It does mean no real break for you but really when a baby is on the floor in a confined play space there is time for you to do whatever you need to do. And it won't last forever as they get older.