How far does your loyalty to clients go?

[CrazyEight]

I MAY have new potential clients, and I'm pondering what to do about it.

I have a part-time family and have gotten an enquiry about 2 spots, when I only have 1 open right now. How far does your loyalty to families go? Would you consider terminating the part-time if it meant filling your last spot, and the current part-time spot, with 2 full-time kids?

I have had problems with this families' "flakiness," for lack of a better word, from the start. It started out as 3 days a week (as that is my minimum) for dcg, almost 4, and her 1-yr-old brother. The only reason I really agreed to it is because they were looking for TWO spots, and I had three to fill. So taking 2 kids 3 days a week was a heck of a lot better than having three spots open, and I wasn't getting any other enquiries.

I agreed that the 1-yr-old could come 1-2 days a week for the first 2 weeks to get used to things, because obviously mom needed it. It wouldn't help the baby, but sure, if it made mom feel better. When she brought back my filled out contract, though, she had added in at the bottom "dcg-3 days a week, dcb-1 day a week."

I had him for 2 days, and then sent her a polite email to enquire as to why she wrote that, reminding her that my minimum is three days a week, and I cannot afford to hold a spot open for 1 day a week.

By the time she wrote back, the baby had had an asthma attack that landed him in the hospital (a condition they kept from me at the interview) and she "would have to see what he's like this week before they make any decisions."

I discussed it with my husband and sent her one back saying that I was not comfortable taking dcb with the asthma being so serious. They were having to give him medicine through a mask a few times a day, it is not something I am familiar with, and frankly, I was terrified that something would happen to the little guy while I had him. I was prepared for them to pull dcg too, but they never even responded to my email! Just acted like it was fine, and have never brought him or mentioned him again since. I'm assuming grandma is watching him. I never did find out what her original intentions were regarding one day vs three days a week, but my guess is that she was only ever going to bring him one day a week, and try to bully me into accepting that.

Dcg is supposed to start coming full-time in July to get her ready for school, but I have a sneaking suspicion that they're not going to want to do that. Come the fall, she will only be B/A school, and I certainly can't afford to only have her 3 days a week then. They know that, but they have avoided answering the question directly, and knowing them now, I suspect they'll have a problem with coming full-time then too. They like to say what I want to hear in the moment, and then go back on it later, and I need to stop allowing it.

I have posted about dcg before...she is not difficult, per se, but she is one of those kids that is just unlikable and (I hate to say it) annoying. She is less advanced than my 2 and 3-yr-olds in many ways. She has zero attention span, no personal boundaries, cannot seem to answer a question with more than yes or no, has no concept of how to clean up, is no where near able to handle things like puzzles, games, or even role play or playdough...honestly she seems quite delayed cognitively and emotionally. Parents laugh it off whenever I gently bring up things like this, and think her insisting on touching, stroking and kissing people constantly is "cute."

She is not aggressive or difficult, doesn't talk back, and isn't disruptive, but she does make things very challenging. For example, she seems incapable of doing anything for more than 5 seconds. Playdough, colouring, playing with a particular toy, even less than my 18-month-old. It is like having a 10-month-old baby, except walking and eating and repeating the SAME 2 or 3 questions over and over and over every. single. day.

Anyways. I will try to get to the point!

I have an enquiry for 2 spots, and I only have 1 now. Even though dcg is not a safety or discipline issue (the things I have had to terminate for in the past), if the opportunity came to fill a part-time spot with a full-time one, would you consider it, in light of the other factors (parents flakiness and tendency to swindle and take advantage of me and dcg's difficulties) would you consider terming?

Nothing is definite, and it is very preliminary - I still need to interview the potential new family, but my question is more hypothetical - do I keep a part-timer because I said I would and they technically haven't violated any of my policies? Or do I keep my options open and consider letting them go?

[Lee-Bee]

If the family had been open, honest and cooperative then I would give my loyalty to them or at least give a good amount of notice (2 months) about needing to fill their spot with a full-time child.

BUT...this family, sadly, does not seem to respect you, or at least has a great deal of difficulty keeping their lines of communication open and are not working WITH you so I would give notice and fill their spot with a full-time, cooperative, respectful family. I'm pretty sure I would have ended the contract with them some time ago due to their lack of communication.

[5 Little Monkeys]

I would stick to my contract and only terminate care if a breach of contract occurred.

However, I would consider changing my contract to say something along the lines of "a part time space may be in jeopardy if a full time space needs to be opened. The part time space holder will have the opportunity to go full time but if they decide not too,the part time space will be terminated"

I actually think I'm going to change my own contract to include this....at the rate I'm going, I will always have part time children unless I do something like this to change it. Being limited to numbers, hopefully most parents would understand the reasoning behind this decision.

[mickyc]

For me personally I never get rid of one family to make room for another. If I cannot accommodate the new family then I don't take them. I don't want a bad name for myself and I stick to my word. If I said I will take a child part-time then so be it. I am stuck with that until they leave. Don't forget, the grass isn't always greener on the other side. 2 new kids might only stay a month or be terrible kids/difficult family etc no matter how great they seem on their interview.

[bright sparks]

I get the impression that if it wasn't for the difficulty in filling the spaces in the first place that you would have termed already...am I correct? I agree with those who say not to term a part timer for a full timer, karma is a bitch and will bite you in the ass, but I am inclined to see this as a little different than that. This family have already broken the terms of their contract from the very first day and withholding medical information would have had me furious and I would have kicked them to the curb immediately. I am assuming again that the reason you didn't was because you couldn't afford to. If this is the case, I wouldn't lose sleep over terming them and filling the spot. Not everything is as black and white as terming a part time for a full timer and I think this is an example of that. I don't think you are going to give yourself a bad name or that you are doing anything wrong. This family have been in a position to be termed on more than one occasion already but you haven't been able to do so and now circumstances may be working in your favour to do what's best for your family. You wouldn't be terming a family who had stuck to their end of the agreement but a family who are not a good fit for you and your daycare anyway. This is my impression from how you explained things.

[CrazyEight]

That is exactly the case, Bright Sparks. My area is absolutely flooded with "daycare" providers. I use quotations because the definition of "daycare" varies very widely, but this is a low-income blue-collar (for the most part) city, and a lot of parents will simply take the cheapest option they can find. I have had terrible luck trying to fill spots, and this family was the first nibble in three months. At this point, I really hesitate to terminate if I don't absolutely HAVE to, as there really is no guarantee that I will manage to fill the spot-and if I do, that the new family will be any better. If I interview this family and they seem decent, I am going to be sorely tempted. If I turn them down, who knows when I will find another possibility for the one spot I currently have open.

[Crayola kiddies]

Well I know I'm different then everybody else but since this child is heading off to school in sept and therefore leaving and I had an opportunity to fill two ft spots it wouldn't even be a question for he because I have to look out for what's best for my business and families will always do what's best for them without even a second thought to the provider. This family would be given their walking papers as soon as the ink was dry on the new contract for two full time children.

[CrazyEight]

I wish it was that easy, Crayola Kiddies. I do the school run with my own kids and offer B/A school care when I need to. My only current B/A school child has a younger sibling in my care full-time, which is why I took the older one. This girl was supposed to have her younger sibling here too, which again is why I took her on, knowing she'd become B/A school in the fall. Now that little brother is gone because of the medical issues, I am left with a child I barely make money off of, and few incentives to do so, but they haven't actually violated my contract. There was an understanding that I would keep her once school started.

[mickyc]

Sorry Crayola kiddies I don't agree. That seems like a "get them before they get me" attitude. I think that is bad for business. Would you send your children to a provider who just terminates as soon as something better comes along? I certainly wouldn't. I don't think it is very professional but that is just my opinion.

To me I would tell the family I have 1 full-time spot available now and another in sept. I would not term one unless there was a major issue (late pickups, late payments, aggressive child etc).

[bright sparks]

I consider a family withholding medical information a major issue and also a family who continues to blatantly disregard polices and rules to be a good enough reason to terminate. I have it written in my contract as grounds for termination.

[Crayola kiddies]

See I don't take school age and therefore don't do school runs .... And I also don't take on part time unless it's an existing family going on mat leave .... And it's not a get Em before they get me attitude it's looking out for the profitability if my business ... Because if my business is not profitable then I can do it and then everyone is out care ..... And when I have my third child in daycare it was pt and I was termed because I was pt but it was purely a business decision and my old care provider and I have been good friends ever since .... Gave me lots of tips and suggestions for when I opened my day home ..... So it's not always a bad thing however I know it's not every body's way !

[bright sparks]

.... And it's not a get Em before they get me attitude it's looking out for the profitability if my business ... Because if my business is not profitable then I can do it and then everyone is out care .....

This is exactly how I feel. It bothers me that people make me feel bad for doing what is in my business' best interest by saying that it is a reflection on who I am and how it is bad practice. Everything I have experienced in the years that I have been in this biz where I have not put myself and my business needs first has resulted in a shortfall that has fallen upon me, not the parents so enough is enough. I am running a business and while this is a very personal line of work, successful business people aren't successful unless they put themselves first....making a very generalized statement here so don't misinterpret what I'm saying.