What would you do?

[madmom]

I have a dcb who has been with me since November 2013 along with his little brother. He is a pretty good child, eats well, mostly behaves well, co-operative for the most part however, he is having some major toileting issues. If he has to go he will stand and look at me (I guess for me to tell him to go) and when I don't reply he will tell me he has to go. Often he won't go for hours on end until I tell him it's time to go. Today at the water park he played for awhile then pretty much stopped playing and walked in circles often pausing to look at me then walking on. I would smile at him, ask if he was ok and he wouldn't answer and kept going. I asked him no less than 3 times if he needed to go and he said no. When it was time to go he was changing out of his bathing suit into shorts and I noticed the front was wet, thinking it was just park water I didn't say anything. I brought him to the bathroom just in case where he went into the stall and wet all over himself. I was upset to say the least, made him sit out the rest of the playtime and took away a privilege this afternoon. I am not sure what to do about all of this. It's not the first time he has had "accidents" and with school starting in about 8 weeks I am concerned. Any advice anyone?

[mickyc]

I don't ask the kids if they need to go I tell them. Doesn't matter how old they are, there are certain times they all take turns trying to go like before we go outside, before nap time etc. Potty time around here is at 9, 10:30, 12:30 and 3. If they need to go in between those times I hope they tell me but for the most part it isn't an issue. If you notice a child holding it tell them that holding it in can hurt their body and they need to listen to their body - is it telling you that you have to go? if they say no, I still say - how about you go try and see.

[Wonderwiper]

Totally agree with mickyc....I never ask, just say it's time to go to the washroom.

IMO punishing a child for accidents is not helpful and can lead to further issues. I don't see the harm in telling him to go when you see he is hoping you will acknowledge him. For whatever reason he is nervous about asking you.

[Other Mummy]

We also have scheduled potty breaks. I tell the children to go potty. However, if the child is almost 4 and still not telling you....that would be frustrating. I'm sure he will be having plenty of accidents at JK. The teacher will not be doing scheduled potty breaks with the class.