What should I do?

[Elly]

Just need some advise...I have been looking after a great little guy for over a year now. When I signed him on, it was agreed at the time that my closing would extend for 15 minutes to accommodate the parents. After about six months, the hours changed back to my original 5:00 closing, and I had a new contract signed reflecting this. Recently (since Christmas), the pick ups have been later and more frequent. I took advise from this forum to have him ready by 5:00, and at drop off, I would say "see you at 5:00". But today was my limit! He didn't get picked up until 5:20, so I mentioned to them I have evening commitments, and closing is at 5:00. They reminded me of the original verbal agreement we had when he started, but I told them the new signed contract reflected the 5:00 pick up. Then they suggested they would find another caregiver. I was upset they would turn so fast, and told them it might be a good idea. I've been a caregiver for over 10 years, and honestly, I'm tired of being taken advantage of. This is a big chunk of money I'm losing, not to mention the sweetest little guy. I don't know what to do. I do have other potential clients waiting. I also feel guilty because I know they are going to have problems finding a caregiver in their area for the hours they want.

Sorry for the long vent.

[Other Mummy]

Sorry you have to deal with this. We all do at one point or another.

Dcm is throwing an adult version of a tantrum. She knows she signed the new agreement, this is why she would tack on a few more minutes of being late each time. And even at a 5:20 pick up, if she did indeed believe she was following the original contract then technically she was still late by 5 min and didn't care. The plus side is you do have potential clients waiting. That puts you in the position of power. She is either bluffing or she is cutting off her nose to spite her face and will be seeking new care very soon.

Why on earth feel guilty. You have absolutely nothing to feel guilty about. You are standing up and upholding your contract. Good for you. After 10 years I think you owe it to yourself to find clients that respect you and your business. DCM feels entitled and now you are taking that away. Boo Hoo. Let her learn a lesson. It's a shame dcb will miss out the most. Leaving a great and warm comfortable environment over a mere 20 min. of time.

I would contact your waiting list. Fill the spot, present dcm with current updated signed contract on 5:00pm closing and then terminate care.

[5 Little Monkeys]

Don't feel guilty! Mom might have been caught off guard and embarrassed and the option to leave might have been a knee jerk reaction to those feelings. If they need longer care than it's in the best interest of all involved. If they don't need past 5, I'm sure they will stay, they'd be silly not too!

[babydom]

I just had the same with a little boy. They said they be here by 5. It slowly went to 515 then 520 then 530. I said no I have plans with my daughters activities and I need to leave by 5. They said sorry and went back to pick up for 5. BUT it lasted two wks then 510 came and boy is still here. I teminated. Our schedules weren't working and they needed a later time I was not going to provide. Yes we miss the kids but it's our business and we need to take care of our selves too. Also in my case my daughter comes first. I'm not going to keep missing her evening activites because they decide to come late. :)

[Lee-Bee]

If you have other clients in line then I would send a note (or in person) and say: In follow up of our conversation on X date I am requesting confirmation of your plan forward as I have families waiting for your space but don't want to fill it before you are ready.

Something along those lines of noting that you are ready to fill the space if they chose, if they chose to stay they need to abide by their contract or you will let them go.

They were indeed throwing a tantrum and hoping to scare you in fear of losing pay...you need to let them know you have no concerns if they leave and that you won't let them twist your arms in fear of them leaving!

[mickyc]

I do not stand for late pick ups! If they agreed to 5 then the old verbal agreement is no longer effective! When you changed it to 5 did you talk to them about it or just give them the new contract to sign? I say this because if you didn't say anything then they might just think that your verbal agreement still stands - that even though the agreement is your rules that you are making an exception for them. Hey you already broke your rule once so unless you actually said that it is 5 now no matter what agreement you made before was then I can understand their side.

We have to set our own rules and stick to them or this is what happens.

Tell mom the new time is 5 and if it doesn't work for them then you consider that their 2 weeks notice. Start advertising immediately and fill the spot.

[Elly]

I do not stand for late pick ups! If they agreed to 5 then the old verbal agreement is no longer effective! When you changed it to 5 did you talk to them about it or just give them the new contract to sign? I say this because if you didn't say anything then they might just think that your verbal agreement still stands - that even though the agreement is your rules that you are making an exception for them. Hey you already broke your rule once so unless you actually said that it is 5 now no matter what agreement you made before was then I can understand their side.

We have to set our own rules and stick to them or this is what happens.

Tell mom the new time is 5 and if it doesn't work for them then you consider that their 2 weeks notice. Start advertising immediately and fill the spot.

True about sticking to our rules. I did go over the contract with them, word for word, and it did work for the last half of last year, its just since Christmas for some reason. Mom drops him off later, and i guess wanders into work late. So she figures she can work late to make up the time.

Well, I learned my lesson. She did drop him off this morning like nothing even happened, so I'll talk to her calmly tonight. She might have just been crying wolf. I really don't want to lose the boy.

Thanks for the advise:)

[mickyc]

Also want to add - do you not have a late pick up fee? I charge $1 for every minute past 5. Once it is 5:20 then it is full days rate. I also would not even let it get to that point. I would start phoning or texting by 5:05! My contract reads that a reserve the right to terminate care in the event pickups are late.

[Elly]

Also want to add - do you not have a late pick up fee? I charge $1 for every minute past 5. Once it is 5:20 then it is full days rate. I also would not even let it get to that point. I would start phoning or texting by 5:05! My contract reads that a reserve the right to terminate care in the event pickups are late.

I don't have a late pick up fee, but I think I'm going to start. All my clients have been so wonderful, I never felt any need for it. Thanks for all the great advice!

[superfun]

So did you get a chance to talk to her at pickup time? Did she say anything about being on time from now on?

[Elly]

So did you get a chance to talk to her at pickup time? Did she say anything about being on time from now on?

I talked with mom this morning. She said they were looking into a centre for him and would let me know. I also just found out that my part timer will be leaving late summer. They're moving out to the country. Looks like I'll be calling my waiting list :)

[Elly]

Update...

That evening, I found out that my husband lost his job :(
On Thursday morning, I decided to tell the clients that I could extend my hours to meet their needs and they said they would think about it. I can't afford to lose this income. I asked on Friday if they knew of their decision, and the mom said she would let me know next week.
So today, I texted them and mentioned there was a potential client and I needed to know if they were staying...all they could say is "We're considering you. Our meeting at the centre is on Wednesday, and I'll let you know by Friday". I know I was being wishy washy with my decision to keep them, and had my husband not lost his job, I would have just let them go. I don't know what kind of game they're playing...if they thought their son was benefiting from my daycare, wouldn't it be a no brainer? I don't know if I should wait until Friday for their answer? I'm losing sleep over this. Any help would be much appreciated:)

[kindertime]

So sorry to hear about your husband's job. That sucks. And as if you need more stress on top of losing clients. Which, is my prediction, btw. Since they know you, know that you are willing to accommodate their hours and they are still planning to meet with the center, I think they already have 1 foot out your door already.

Is it possible they were "pushing" their hours to get you to put your foot down? Some people don't like to take the initiative but rather choose to manipulate you into doing it for them. It has happened to me.

First thing Mon. morning, start calling your waiting list. Set up appointments. If you keep it vague the fact that spaces are available, then you can be prepared for any scenario.

I have had several parents take their children out of my daycare in favor of a big center. And I have one family that has been with me for 10 years and another for 6! It takes all kinds. Good luck and try to get some sleep tonight.

[Elly]

So sorry to hear about your husband's job. That sucks. And as if you need more stress on top of losing clients. Which, is my prediction, btw. Since they know you, know that you are willing to accommodate their hours and they are still planning to meet with the center, I think they already have 1 foot out your door already.

Is it possible they were "pushing" their hours to get you to put your foot down? Some people don't like to take the initiative but rather choose to manipulate you into doing it for them. It has happened to me.

First thing Mon. morning, start calling your waiting list. Set up appointments. If you keep it vague the fact that spaces are available, then you can be prepared for any scenario.

I have had several parents take their children out of my daycare in favor of a big center. And I have one family that has been with me for 10 years and another for 6! It takes all kinds. Good luck and try to get some sleep tonight.

Thanks for the advise!

There is hope in the long term. I have two lined up for July, and another possibility for September which is great. It's just what to do in the meantime, so yes, I will call my waiting list. I think what's bothering me most is the unknown and the head games.

[Suzie_Homemaker]

I agree. This Mom now thinks she's the boss. She is leaving you hanging around whilst she picks and chooses on her own schedule. I don't let that happen, I like things done on my schedule and if someone is being fishy, then I find replacer and give notice to fit with when the replacer starting. So what if it's not convenient to the person I am terming, clients give notice on their best time frame and so do I.

[Elly]

Update...
So this is funny.. Ever since my clients told me they were leaving for a centre mid-March, they've been arriving on or before my closing. I feel like asking them why, but then again...what's the point? I don't want to stir the pot.

Thanks to everybody for all the help and suggestions. This forum is a blessing:)