I am so done!

[Fun&care]

So I posted in another thread that I've decided to give notice to my daycare families May 1st that I will be closing permanently at the end of June. So they get about a two month notice period which I think is more than fair. And I get the summer off which I am SUPER excited for! Money will be tight but I may not get this opportunity to have the summer off with my kids for a long while. I'll be looking for employment aiming for August/September start.

Problem is I don't even know if I can make it til then! One of the (many) reasons I am closing is due to my daughter being fed up with daycare. I had a four day weekend and it was bliss. She is a really sweet kid and behaves really well...until the daycare kids return. The last two days have been horrible. She throws fits for no reason, is sometimes rough with the others and generally is not a happy camper. I think she is just so over the whole daycare thing. She turned 4 in feb and is sooooo ready for school. The daycare environment is not challenging enough for her but it is also frustrating to her to always have to share her home, her mother and her things with these kids for 50 hours per week. She does have her room with her own toys she can retreat to when she wants too, and she does so often but still....

I myself am really not into it anymore so it's hard. Every day I am counting down. Its tough because I still have to put on a smile and give these kids the care they deserve of course. But it's hard when you're not in the mood!

Thanks for letting me vent!!!

[bright sparks]

I hear you!

Your daughter like you say is probably more than ready for kindergarten and I am assuming from what you say that this is the brunt of the cause for her acting out. That being said, life sometimes sucks and we have to learn to deal with it, even when we are 4. Even though you are closing, she will take important lessons from the time you have been running a daycare which will no doubt serve her well when she has to spend 5 days a week with a large group where she won't get the close attention she once got at home with you and a smaller group. It will hopefully make her have a greater tolerance as she grows up due to having to share you and her home. It may suck now, but I think these are difficult but extremely valuable lessons our children have to learn. When you are done, you are done though. I totally get it. I have 18 weeks left and wish I could close earlier but I won't be getting another job, I'll be a full time student for 6 years so I need to make every penny until closing day count.

My group of kids are great, it's more the parents that are driving me a little batty now who I have to bite my tongue with. My tolerance for the BS is rapidly reducing so I have to try not to react to it as its not worth it at this point. I'd recommend making the most of things while you are at home with your daughter as like you said, you'll never get that time again. Make a bucket list with your daughter of special activities you want to do before closing. Have her be involved in planning and executing them to hopefully positively engage her in your daycare for the last 3 months till closing day.

[Lee-Bee]

Do you think she might respond well to some sort of count down till the daycare closes. Maybe phrase it differently...count down until a "Mommy and Me summer" Something fun like a big jar of jelly beans...she gets to eat one every night and can watch how the jar empties until the last day of daycare.

Not sure if it would help any...but could be fun and you can try to spin it so she realizes she only has a little time left for daycare so try to make the most of it.

Also maybe have her spends some of her daycare time planning the summer. Make lists of what she would like to do, places to go, games to play, crafts to do etc. Get her mind off how she isn't enjoying the daycare and thinking ahead to what she will enjoy.

[innisfildaycare]

I am in the same and the exact opposite position that you are in!! LOL...My count down has already begun at home with my boys!! I'll be quitting my job, after 3 years, to get BACK into daycare (which I did for 6 years before going back to work) We all have missed it terribly!! I love the Jelly bean in a jar idea and Im am going to definitely do that, except replace the jelly beans with chocolate!!

[mickyc]

This is why I have my daycare separate from my living space. My daughter has the option of going upstairs to play or watch tv if she needs to get away. It's not her choice I did daycare. She never ever has to share her toys.

Good luck over the next few months. It's hard to keep your head in the game when you know you are done.

[Fun&care]

I agree that my kids will have learned valuable lessons from doing daycare. Daycare has been great in a lot of ways. For one my kids are great with little ones...they've watched their mom take care of others for years so it only makes sense! Plus I am grateful that I got to be there with them in their early years and I wouldn't trade that for anything.

Oddly enough though, I also have less tolerance for parent BS, BUT I'm finding that I'm just letting things slide because I know it's almost over anyways and there isn't much of a point. For one, one of my dc families has been paying late consistently because of sick days taken by me or them on payday. This same family brought their daughter to daycare after saying she had thrown up the night before ( despite my 24 hour policy!!!!!)....they have been with me the longest and it's frustrating that they feel maybe I am "cool" with these things because we have a good rapport. It's disrespectful but I just don't feel like dealing with it. I know I should but....meh.

I love the idea of counting down with a jar of jelly beans! I will have to start that later on though since we haven't told the kids yet. I know for a fact they would just blurt it out to the daycare kids or parents if they knew!

Just to clarify mickyc that I did mention she is free to play in her room which has LOTS of her own toys that belong to her and only her although she sometimes chooses to bring some down and share them with her friends.

I think it will do her some good to have the summer off just as much as it will do me some good. I think having a break from being with other kids will be good for her and when she starts school she can start fresh.

[torontokids]

I had this same problem with my daughter who is now in JK. I sometimes see this happening with my now 3 yo as well. What has helped me was letting her have more freedom to play in her room, watch TV as was suggested. I asked my in laws for help to take her to a gymnastic program or something one day a week out of the house but that never happened. I think it would have been good for her though. I tried spending more time with her (I know this is hard because you are exhausted) we would read a story together at nap time and snuggle. I involved her in planning what we would do. We did a lot more park outings because I knew she loved them although I dreaded them because it is so much work! When I am feeling uninspired in general with daycare I spend some time over the weekend coming up with an awesome "rec schedule." I found I was more likely to do things if they were written down but I didn't stress if they didn't happen either. I would let her do somethings that the others couldn't do e.g. my 3 y o daughter now gets to "wash dishes" where she basically plays in the soapy water in the kitchen sink which is normally off limits to the kids unless I am in there (it's gated).

I was also very firm with her. I found that because I felt guilty that she wasn't happy I started to let things slide with her behaviour. I ran a tighter ship and she settled more too.

[AmandaKDT]

My daughter was so done with being around the daycare kids by the time it got to the spring before kindergarten started. Even though her bedroom was off limits to the daycare kids, it wasn't enough. She is so much happier being at school every day with kids her own age or older. Last summer I ended up finding some summer day camps and sending her to spend time with her grandparents because it was stressful for me to deal with her being so unhappy almost every day.

I don't know how this summer is going to go, but I have also decided that I will be closing my daycare sometime around August or September. My body just can't handle the demands of taking care of all these little kids, my hands are not getting better. I need to have atleast 4 or 5 full time daycare kids and I physically can't do it. The idea of going through another long winter with all the snow suits just makes my hands ache. :-(

So we are arranging daycare for my own girls for the fall and trying to getting everything sorted out. I don't know what I will do for work yet, but if anything I will substitute teach.

[torontokids]

I would also suggest you send her to a community centre daycare for a week or 2 over the summer. I know you want to spend the time with her but this will help her develop more skills to prep her for kindergarten, including listening to other authority figures, and also may help mix up your summer and she will have fun!

[Fun&care]

I think she is going to LOVE school. She loves other kids in general and wherever we go, she always wants to make friends. Which is a huge contrast from my older son who was super shy and introverted. He had a hard time with school but I am positive she won't.

Sorry to hear your hands aren't improving Amanda. I can't imagine how you get through the day while managing physical pain. Snowsuits are the worst even without pain!

[3rdtimesacharm]

I applaud your decision Fun&Care!! Good for you! You have actually inspired me from reading your post this morning. I sent a message to my hubby and said "i'm done with daycare, end of june. Summer off, will find work in Sept". He said "good for you!". I just had a good cry after I put the kids down. I have been feeling very fed up with it all lately too. The parents, the kids. Everything. March Break was a big eye-opener as well. I had 8 kids here everyday and of course we were too busy to pack up and head out to all the cool stuff they had going on. I felt bad for my son, who is in JK having to spend his week off school with the daycare kids who he hardly enjoys. That is what summer will look like. Every. Damn. Day. My kids (1,3 and 4) are only little once and I don't want to be so busy with daycare that I don't notice their amazing growing and adorable things they say. Oh god, I could cry again!
Anyways, I just want to say thank you, for putting in this post what I have been wanting to do, and seeing you do it and for the reasons, you have inspired me to remember that the money is not everything. My kids and family are. Hugs to you!!

[Fun&care]

I would also suggest you send her to a community centre daycare for a week or 2 over the summer. I know you want to spend the time with her but this will help her develop more skills to prep her for kindergarten, including listening to other authority figures, and also may help mix up your summer and she will have fun!


There is a program that they are offering at her school which I am considering. It's a 4 week program from I think 9-11:30 everyday over the summer and it's aimed at kids who either need to improve their french skills (it's a french school) or who aren't used to being away from mommy and daddy etc. it's also free which is awesome. At this point hubby and I both think she needs a break from being with other kids though. She has no problem listening to authority figures. She is in ballet and swimming and will be in baseball this summer. She is always well behaved, never had any issues. So well see I guess. We have to be accepted in the program before we decide anyways.

[Fun&care]

I applaud your decision Fun&Care!! Good for you! You have actually inspired me from reading your post this morning. I sent a message to my hubby and said "i'm done with daycare, end of june. Summer off, will find work in Sept". He said "good for you!". I just had a good cry after I put the kids down. I have been feeling very fed up with it all lately too. The parents, the kids. Everything. March Break was a big eye-opener was well. I had 8 kids here everyday and of course we were too busy to pack up and head out to all the cool stuff they had going on. I felt bad for my son, who is in JK having to spend his week off school with the daycare kids who he hardly enjoys. That is what summer will look like. Every. Damn. Day. My kids (1,3 and 4) are only little once and I don't want to be so busy with daycare that I don't notice their amazing growing and adorable things they say. Oh god, I could cry again!
Anyways, I just want to say thank you, for putting in this post what I have been wanting to do, and seeing you do it and for the reasons, you have inspired me to remember that the money is not everything. My kids and family are. Hugs to you!!

Glad to hear my story is inspiring! I've had a few good cries over the last few weeks too. It's hard making the final decision. Based on how exhausted I've been (was also diagnosed with adrenal fatigue) I knew that it wouldn't be wise to jump from daycare to another job. I knew I needed a break and some time to recover in between so it works out nicely this way. Both kids will be off to school in late August and I will be working! It's going to be such a change, I can't wait. Best of luck!

[Spixie33]

Good for you to cut the daycare cord.

This was supposed to be the year I get out of daycare also. It is my fifth year and it was my goal but then two years ago, i decided to make it indefinite.
I have a pretty good group, i have parents lined up for 2016 and have good parents who seem to appreciate what I do BUT I feel worn out. Everything feels like I've been there and done it and I have nothing new to prove and I spend time fantasizing about working outside the home with adults almost daily.

The grass always seem greener on the other side so I try to tell myself to think this through carefully but I am really temped to just say I can't do another winter of being trapped inside for -30 windchill or even bundling up five kids on mild days and navigating snowmeggedon sidewalks.

Sigh. It's such a tough decision.

Now with Bill 10 I wonder what I would do to get my kids into after school and before school care because BA care is going to get difficult even though my kids are 11 and 9.:blink::blink:

[torontokids]

We are at an advantage a bit when we decide to close. I have my daughter on the wait list for B&A and the baby we aren't pregnant with on daycare lists as well. I am closing for a mat leave and I don't think I will reopen. If I do, I am interested in only having teacher families.

[bright sparks]

Good for you to cut the daycare cord.

This was supposed to be the year I get out of daycare also. It is my fifth year and it was my goal but then two years ago, i decided to make it indefinite.
I have a pretty good group, i have parents lined up for 2016 and have good parents who seem to appreciate what I do BUT I feel worn out. Everything feels like I've been there and done it and I have nothing new to prove and I spend time fantasizing about working outside the home with adults almost daily.

The grass always seem greener on the other side so I try to tell myself to think this through carefully but I am really temped to just say I can't do another winter of being trapped inside for -30 windchill or even bundling up five kids on mild days and navigating snowmeggedon sidewalks.

Sigh. It's such a tough decision.

Now with Bill 10 I wonder what I would do to get my kids into after school and before school care because BA care is going to get difficult even though my kids are 11 and 9.:blink::blink:

It is hard to cut the cord I agree. I am coming up on my 10 year anniversary and I've been trying to get out for years. There are definite pros to this job and I don't mean to dismiss them, but I have really run myself into the ground and made myself ill in this job. I don't know why its harder on some than others...maybe those able to set clearer boundaries and really and truly stick to them lol, and I don't think it is a reflection on capabilities but I just feel so mentally under stimulated and the isolation has really taken a toll on me over the years.

I came to this country with the intention of doing my nursing degree. I had been accepted into University prior to my husbands job offer and I decided that getting the kids over and settled in school was a priority and it was perfect timing for my eldest to go into JK. Unfortunatly I just assumed as it is the same degree that I would have the entry requirements given that I'd already been accepted. Little did I know that I needed Grade 12 which isn't part of high school in the UK, so enter home daycare. I always had the intention of doing it short term and going to Uni but it is hard to give up the security of a paying job when you have kids and a mortgage to pay. No matter how much I enjoy taking care of the kids and that I have spent so much valuable time with my own kids, it has come at a massive expense to myself. I have struggled cutting the cord because it wasn't simply a case of going from self employed to employed. It was self employed to no job/full time student and then paying for that while supporting the family on 1 income for an extended period of time. I am still terrified now and I don't cry about it so much, which it sounds to me 3rdtimesacharm is out of relief and revelation at your choice, but I do constantly seem to come up with any number of excuses and reasons why this move for me is a bad one. Trying to talk myself out of it out of fear I think. I am used to the money, I absolutely love and treasure seeing my kids off every morning and greeting them home each day but I have lost my entire identity outside of being a mother and caregiver. I don't think I ever truly had one to begin with being a mother at 18 and mother of two at 20. Now is my time!

Good luck to all those embarking on new ventures. Exciting times lie ahead, and kudos to those still caring for our most prized possessions....these children are the future and each and every caregiver plays such an amazing and important role in their life. That is what I remind myself when asshat parents push my buttons. It's the kids who deserve the best of me and we'll keep drop off and pick up brief so I can focus positivity where needed and reduce the negativity so many are toxic with.

[here_we_grow@shaw.ca]

I could not help but reply to your post.... I was in the same shoes with my 4 years old son. Sharing mommy was not going to happen! So much so that it started impacting my daycare negatively and lets not even talk about his behavior. He went from being this typical 4 years old active boy to being impossible to deal with. So I had to stop and think what the right thing was for him to do..... I ended up putting him back into his daycare which he attended previous to me having my own. Within 6-8 days I had "my kid' back. Let me tell you it sucks for our budget and it has made things more difficult with drop of and pick ups but it is soooo worth it! You are not alone :)
I am happy for you that you are almost done! This occupation although rewarding can take its toll on one...Enjoy your summer with your kids


So I posted in another thread that I've decided to give notice to my daycare families May 1st that I will be closing permanently at the end of June. So they get about a two month notice period which I think is more than fair. And I get the summer off which I am SUPER excited for! Money will be tight but I may not get this opportunity to have the summer off with my kids for a long while. I'll be looking for employment aiming for August/September start.

Problem is I don't even know if I can make it til then! One of the (many) reasons I am closing is due to my daughter being fed up with daycare. I had a four day weekend and it was bliss. She is a really sweet kid and behaves really well...until the daycare kids return. The last two days have been horrible. She throws fits for no reason, is sometimes rough with the others and generally is not a happy camper. I think she is just so over the whole daycare thing. She turned 4 in feb and is sooooo ready for school. The daycare environment is not challenging enough for her but it is also frustrating to her to always have to share her home, her mother and her things with these kids for 50 hours per week. She does have her room with her own toys she can retreat to when she wants too, and she does so often but still....

I myself am really not into it anymore so it's hard. Every day I am counting down. Its tough because I still have to put on a smile and give these kids the care they deserve of course. But it's hard when you're not in the mood!

Thanks for letting me vent!!!

[5 Little Monkeys]

Good luck to all of you who are going on to new things!! How exciting :)

Childcare is not an easy profession and is something that not everyone can do...add in running your own daycare and it's even more exhausting...physica lly, mentally, emotionally and financially!!! Some people don't realize how hard it can be! Be proud of yourselves for being able to do it for as long as you did and take pride in knowing that you have played a very beneficial and crucial part in so many children's lives!!

[Suzie_Homemaker]

Ok. Maybe time to think outside the box.

Is there another provider near you who you respect and trust who has own kid too? What about swapping kids? I serious. It just for couple months. You take other provider's kid, she takes yours. Sure it'll be a pain to physically get them to each other but it will be interest for each child to make new friends, switch up routine.

I not even know if this practical but sometimes, thinking outside the box is answer.

[5 Little Monkeys]

Ok. Maybe time to think outside the box.

Is there another provider near you who you respect and trust who has own kid too? What about swapping kids? I serious. It just for couple months. You take other provider's kid, she takes yours. Sure it'll be a pain to physically get them to each other but it will be interest for each child to make new friends, switch up routine.

I not even know if this practical but sometimes, thinking outside the box is answer.

A friend of mine who had a hdc when her children were younger did this 2 days a week with a friend. I think it's a great idea and if I had a child, I would seriously consider it

[Fun&care]

Ok. Maybe time to think outside the box.

Is there another provider near you who you respect and trust who has own kid too? What about swapping kids? I serious. It just for couple months. You take other provider's kid, she takes yours. Sure it'll be a pain to physically get them to each other but it will be interest for each child to make new friends, switch up routine.

I not even know if this practical but sometimes, thinking outside the box is answer.

I've considered this before. It's not a bad idea, though I'm not sure it would be worth it financially. I don't make much $ to begin with as I only take in 3 daycare kids at any onetime. If I then have to pay for daycare for my daughter then I only have the income of two daycare kids, at which point it just doesn't seem worth it. We only have until May when I give notice and then I really can't say who will be here for how long. I think we can find ways to cope until then, not to mention that once the weather warms up it should make things easier too. It's a good idea though!

[5 Little Monkeys]

In my friends case, there was no money exchanged. Just swapped kids 2x a week, care for care.

I hope all your parents stay on till the end!! Would make it so much nicer for you financially!

[Suzie_Homemaker]

I've considered this before. It's not a bad idea, though I'm not sure it would be worth it financially. I don't make much $ to begin with as I only take in 3 daycare kids at any onetime. If I then have to pay for daycare for my daughter then I only have the income of two daycare kids, at which point it just doesn't seem worth it. We only have until May when I give notice and then I really can't say who will be here for how long. I think we can find ways to cope until then, not to mention that once the weather warms up it should make things easier too. It's a good idea though!

If you swapping kids, no money exchange. Money might raise question about costs and scams etc. I meant just swap kids. You feed hers, she feeds yours, you entertain hers, you entertain hers. Literally new challenges and environment and friends for both but no money. You have same income as now, she have same income as now.

[Polkaroo]

I feel the exact same way. My son is also acting up but fine when there are no dck around. I'm closing due to bill 10 and since I've made my decision I am also fed up and counting the days. I was lucky because I found a job exactly where I wanted to work (walking distance) right away. I think once we know change is coming we are impatient and can't wait. Good luck with your new endeavors and enjoy your summer off with your kiddos ;)

[5 Little Monkeys]

Congrats Polkaroo! I haven't seen you post in awhile and wondered how you were! Glad to hear that things are going well...when is your hdc closing??

[bright sparks]

To keep me positive in the weeks leading up to my closing date, I am going to start a bucket list of daycare activities that I've said I'll always get around to doing. You know the whole, "next year". Maybe even start doing some of those pinterest activities that I so constantly pin lol It is so easy to get disengaged and be willing the days and weeks to go by quickly, but I try to catch myself and focus on the benefits of daycare that I will miss when I close. That usually helps when I get a bit blue.

[Polkaroo]

I know I was MIA lol. I'm waiting to receive the paperwork before giving notice (should be sometime next week). Then I must give my 4 weeks notice. So sometime in may. It's a bitter sweet feeling. I LOVE my dck and dcp but with this new law I had no choice. I'm lucky I found exactly what I was looking for in just one application. I see it as it was meant to be.

[Polkaroo]

To keep me positive in the weeks leading up to my closing date, I am going to start a bucket list of daycare activities that I've said I'll always get around to doing. You know the whole, "next year". Maybe even start doing some of those pinterest activities that I so constantly pin lol It is so easy to get disengaged and be willing the days and weeks to go by quickly, but I try to catch myself and focus on the benefits of daycare that I will miss when I close. That usually helps when I get a bit blue.

Wow I have been away a while. Congrats bright sparks! Will you be returning to school as you had planned? I'm going back to work and starting part time studies.

[bright sparks]

Wow I have been away a while. Congrats bright sparks! Will you be returning to school as you had planned? I'm going back to work and starting part time studies.

Yes I got accepted to do my degree. Psychology and Sexuality Studies :D:D:D:D I register for classes in 3 weeks! Full time student Arghhh! Lol The commute is going to be interesting...I have to drive into TO so a nice 110km commute each way a couple days a week!

I finish in 18 weeks and we, hubby, kids and myself, are going to Europe for 3 weeks....the day I finish I'll be on a plane 4 hours later. Ill be broke while I'm in school but at least it will be consistent lol I've also had a 2nd job since Sept doing data entry so the plan is to continue doing that around class time in addition to getting an on campus job.

What are you taking at school?

[Polkaroo]

Yes I got accepted to do my degree. Psychology and Sexuality Studies :D:D:D:D I register for classes in 3 weeks! Full time student Arghhh! Lol The commute is going to be interesting...I have to drive into TO so a nice 110km commute each way a couple days a week!

I finish in 18 weeks and we, hubby, kids and myself, are going to Europe for 3 weeks....the day I finish I'll be on a plane 4 hours later. Ill be broke while I'm in school but at least it will be consistent lol I've also had a 2nd job since Sept doing data entry so the plan is to continue doing that around class time in addition to getting an on campus job.

What are you taking at school?

OMG. I'm so excited for you !!!! I'm taking forensic accounting and then my plan is to apply to do my degree. We'll see! I'm excited.

[Fun&care]

I feel the exact same way. My son is also acting up but fine when there are no dck around. I'm closing due to bill 10 and since I've made my decision I am also fed up and counting the days. I was lucky because I found a job exactly where I wanted to work (walking distance) right away. I think once we know change is coming we are impatient and can't wait. Good luck with your new endeavors and enjoy your summer off with your kiddos ;)

Good for you for finding what you wanted. I hope I am lucky to find something great too, although I'm not sure what that is! I don't have post secondary education so we'll see where the wind takes me!

Impatient is putting it lightly for me lol. I am the type of person who will put my ALL into everything I do but the reverse is also true in that when I am done, I want to be done NOW. It's been a struggle and I have to will myself through every day. At least easter weekend is almost here.

[bright sparks]

OMG. I'm so excited for you !!!! I'm taking forensic accounting and then my plan is to apply to do my degree. We'll see! I'm excited.

Thank you. I am so excited for you too :) Forensic accounting sounds really interesting too....You'll do great I am sure!!!

[Polkaroo]

Thank you. I am so excited for you too :) Forensic accounting sounds really interesting too....You'll do great I am sure!!!

Thanks! And knowing your background and the passion you have you will do great! Everyone should follow their heart and you're definitely going to help a lot of ppl. Keep us posted!

[torontokids]

I feel the exact same way. My son is also acting up but fine when there are no dck around. I'm closing due to bill 10 and since I've made my decision I am also fed up and counting the days. I was lucky because I found a job exactly where I wanted to work (walking distance) right away. I think once we know change is coming we are impatient and can't wait. Good luck with your new endeavors and enjoy your summer off with your kiddos ;)

I'm dying to know what your new job is! Are you going to share? I love all these stories of people moving on to new things because it just shows how versatile we all are. A lot of us left careers to be home with our kids and then move on to other things when needed or we want to.

[Polkaroo]

I'm dying to know what your new job is! Are you going to share? I love all these stories of people moving on to new things because it just shows how versatile we all are. A lot of us left careers to be home with our kids and then move on to other things when needed or we want to.

It's a project management position for the CFO of a local organization. I'm excited as I will be going to school in finance what better person to work for to learn the ropes. It's still a bitter sweet feeling as I love my dck and dcp. Will be sad when the time comes to let them go.

[torontokids]

Congrats! Sounds like a good fit!

[XIAO]

I hear you.....
how long have your been open?