Transition tips?

[kindredspirit]

I have an 11 month of starting soon, and I can't decide how is best to start. She will be full time M-F by mid-November. I want to do a couple half days the week before so she can get used to me. I worry that she would be expecting her mom early all the time. Has anyone started with a few hours in the afternoon? So she learns when pick up time is? Any insights? The youngest I have taken so far is a 14mo, and he never had a transition (likely due to multiple caregivers from birth because Mom was in school).

[kindertime]

The longer I do daycare, the more I realise that the way a child transitions is determined as much by their own personality as anything else. If the child is mild-mannered by nature, she may not need any transition time at all. (But maybe you and her parents do. :) ) If she is a fussy child to begin with, it might not matter one way or the other. Over the years, (11) I have always offered a slow integration time, but no one has taken me up on it yet. In the last month, I have had 2 new babies start and both acted like they had always been here. Both are 6 months old, so a little young for the integration issues. I have also had babies start at 11-12 months, some are just criers and some are not.

However, despite what I was saying at the beginning, I was just talking to a friend this afternoon about one of her new babies. The mom wants to just bring her 1 or 2 days per week, randomly, and only for a couple of hours at a time. So she's been doing that for a couple of weeks now and the child is miserable. She'll come to pick up unexpectedly, just when the baby's gone to sleep, or drop her off later some days than others. It's a bit of a mess. So if you are going to do a transition, I would suggest that it be structured and you both agree about the times and terms ahead of the start.

[Busy ECE mommy]

I do transitions in the 1-2 weeks before starting full time. I do 1hr/2hrs/3 hrs with lunch(all consecutive days and morning visits, as that's when most of the structured day happens) then I'll do a shortened full day like 9-3pm. I specify the times in my contract, so there is no changing the times, or spontaneous dropoff or pickups. If they need more visits, we do more. I don't like to drag it out forever though. I find 3-4 visits(without parents) is usually enough. I find the sooner they get into the full-time routine, the better.

[Lee-Bee]

The only thing I would consider offering is a cold start (full time) or a one week transition. Day one arrives after last child comes in and stays 1 hr. Day two: arrives after last child and stays 2 hours. Day three: stays until just before lunch. Day four: Stays for lunch leaves before nap. Day five: stays for nap and leaves right after waking (but have parents ready to come should child just not nap).

By having the child come after the last child arrives you prevent the child from having to deal with all the parents coming and going which means a smoother start for them.

I have found this helpful as the first visit are so short they come and go without being too stressed and therefore make the next visit a good visit as well. By the time they stay for nap they have been there 4 days and are in a position to go down a little easier.

I would NOT allow random timed visits. It just isn't fair to the child or other children.

[kindredspirit]

Thanks! I don't want the Mom to stay. I feel awkward, and like I'm being watched. I've offered for her to come 2 consecutive days the week before. Her mornings will be very early, so I've asked the Mom to wake her early those days, have a morning nap, then come here for the afternoon (an hor the first day, lunch and nap the second day). Then full time the next week.

[jupadia]

I like cold starts the best. I find its easier to get into a routine this way. the child gets use to the schedule faster for full timers at least. With part timers I find it always takes awhile either way. But I'll offer to do trastion days more for the parent but I limit them to just a few.

[Suzie_Homemaker]

I not often have transitions. They come in cold first morning at what will be their normal drop off time. I find younger children do better than age 2+ with this.

I have two times has slower transition with breast feeding Mom or those who been paying for empty space before they need it, and then they like start couple week before need to. I do allow but not day here and there. I strongly suggest that each day, set time, getting longer day is best way. It never seem work if they have day here, day home, type arrangement.

I doing this again min-Nov too. Space will be empty from this Monday and so parent paying for space but not need go back work until December. Child will come 7am and be picked up by 11am to begin. Then stay for lunch few days in. And before proper start will extend day until after nap time then be picked up. Finger crossed. I not like phase ins.