Parents and boundaries..

[Rose1]

Hi everyone,
What are your policies about parents and their access to the rest of the house besides the day care area?
In example:Are you ok if they arrive in the morning and head straight to the kitchen to get some milk from the fridge,without letting you know they are in or even asking if they could do that?
Please give me some honest opinions what are the rules in your day care and what would you do in situations like this...
Thanks 🙂

[Home away]

I would be shocked if one of my parents behaved this way without asking permission. most of my parents stay at the front door. Sometimes their child wants to show them something in my playroom ( like a fort they built that day)or they ask if they can use my bathroom. I have no problem with this.
BUT they don't walk into my house as though they live there.

[Suzie_Homemaker]

Hi everyone,
What are your policies about parents and their access to the rest of the house besides the day care area?
In example:Are you ok if they arrive in the morning and head straight to the kitchen to get some milk from the fridge,without letting you know they are in or even asking if they could do that?
Please give me some honest opinions what are the rules in your day care and what would you do in situations like this...
Thanks ��

No. And the only way to stop this rude behavior is to tackle it head on when it happens. I am a direct person and would have no issue in saying "Excuse me but that is a private part of my house and it's also my household groceries. This is not a cafe or a public building where you have full access. Please drop your child off at the door and do not invade the privacy of my family."

I keep my front door locked and I open it as each child arrives. My daycare is on the main level of my home and it would be too easy for parents to do just exactly what you are dealing with. By greeting them at the door personally, I can head off client's from feeling the need to come in. My client's remain in the foyer, they can see the other children playing from where they are and once their child's boots and coats are off, they can give their child a kiss and leave. You have to define what your personal boundaries are and be willing to enforce them. Not after the event, as and when they happen. Do not be afraid of offending a client who behaves this way - they clearly had no issue in offending you in your own home.


Why does the child need a drink on arrival?
Did they not have breakfast before leaving home?

You could also address this by saying that the fees do not include additional food and drinks and if the child did not have a drink at home, then there is water available until morning snack time and that you are happy to get a child that if need be.

[Rose1]

Thank you so much for making me feel understood! That is exactly how I felt at the moment..Shocked and speechless!!
In the past parent would occasionally push the boundaries,but I could not ever imagine it would go this far.
I am still in that shocking state:(

[Rose1]

As shocked as I was,I still managed to tell her that it is not proper to do that and I don’t appreaciate it,but she was standing in my kitchen like she was in her own house and it was all right...no feeling sorry at all just wanted to please her child no matter what...

[Suzie_Homemaker]

Good for you.

Hopefully she heard you loud and clear but if not, at least you know that you can speak up and remind her that she is a guest in your day home, not in your house.

[Van]

As shocked as I was,I still managed to tell her that it is not proper to do that and I don’t appreaciate it,but she was standing in my kitchen like she was in her own house and it was all right...no feeling sorry at all just wanted to please her child no matter what...

She was RUDE!!
I am glad you spoke up even when you were shocked as I don't think she will try that one again so good for you.

[BlueRose]

This is my policy: 1. The areas of the property that are not used for the daycare children (inside/outside of the building) are private. The client(s) will respect the private areas.

They can NOT go into the private areas of my home/yard.

[Rose1]

THANK YOU all for your supporting ideas and for responding so fast to my post...truly appreaciated !! I feel so much better after reading all your comments! I know I am not alone in this!

I was questioning myself if I overreacted,but then I personally would never do such thing even in my friends house where I feel free and comfortable.In my mind it is all about respect..I guess,we are all not the same and we all are not looking at things the same way:(
Working with little children is not easy at all,but dealing with their parents can be so much more difficult sometimes:(

[Lee-Bee]

I'll just add my big NO!

No way. They are not your family, they are not your friend, they do NOT belong in your fridge.

I am so glad you were able to express this on the spot. Hopefully they heard you and do not attempt that again!

[Rose1]

“No way. They are not your family, they are not your friend, they do NOT belong in your fridge.“

That is exactly my point!! I am not hiding anything,but still think that they are not welcome in areas of my house other than the day care area.
The thing that we share our home with the day care children,does not give their parents right to roam all around like it is their own house...ahh some people just like to stretch the limits...And yet we are wondering why the children are that way as they are!?

[Suzie_Homemaker]

“No way. They are not your family, they are not your friend, they do NOT belong in your fridge.“

That is exactly my point!! I am not hiding anything,but still think that they are not welcome in areas of my house other than the day care area.
The thing that we share our home with the day care children,does not give their parents right to roam all around like it is their own house...ahh some people just like to stretch the limits...And yet we are wondering why the children are that way as they are!?

This reminds me of one day care interview I did. I had shown the potential client's the day care space and also where the children sleep. They then asked if they were going to be shown the other rooms in my home. I actually had to remind them that they were here to see the daycare space and not here on a house tour.