Terminating my first family

I'm terminating my first family this afternoon.

I have a great letter written up. I've put it in a sealed envelope with their receipt from last month. I'm about to put it in the diaper bag.... now what!

What do I say to mom when she comes to pick up? I don't want her to know before she leaves, I don't want to discuss it then, I have other kids to care for.

She probably doesn't expect it. I've had a discussion with her about her childs behaviour over the last few days. She's usually a good kid and has suddenly starting into a lot of unnessasary aggressive behaviour. She's also started the "flop" when she doesn't like my answer or I ask her to return to the daycare room... or simply ask her to use walking feet in the house. Those aren't my reasons though. Very simply, she's here until 7 most nights. She's part time and doesn't have a consistent schedule, it's different every week. It's simply interupting my family time and that comes first. I've given her a months notice. So I feel like I'm being overly fair!

I just don't know what to say to her at pick up.

Any suggestions?

I think you should hand it to her personally and say to her I have thought long and hard about this and I feel I have no other option but I will no longer be able to provide care for your child everything is in the letter please read it when you get home and if you have any questions please feel free to call me. I wouldn't want a parent to slip a letter into the child's bag and not say anything to me if they were the ones terminating. Make sure you keep a copy for yourself.

Are you giving her notice, or just flat out terminating? Because, if she's coming back on Monday, you'll have to face her anyway. If you just can't bear the confrontation, I'd tell her with a smile, "oh, just to let you know there's a letter in dck's bag to look at over the weekend". Something like that...or if you're really nervous (as I would be too - there's no shame in it), text or call her later and tell her it's there.

You're right. I do need to say something. Just not sure what. Maybe... " your reciept is in your bag. There's also a letter in there that I need you to take a look at when you get home. It's not something I can discuss in front of "daycaregirl" but if you have any questions or concerns I will be home tonight, feel free to give me a call"

I missed if you updated your last thread, but before you had mentioned changing your hours...did you send a notice out about that? Or have you just decided to terminate? Just curious! :)
I, too, would let her know that there is a letter in the child's bag for her to read when she gets home and to give you a call if she has any questions. I have never been in the position to terminate, but I can only imagine how nerve wracking/awkward it can be! I wish you luck!

I had a letter written up to change the hours and I was going to give it to her today. But, there was a behavioural issue with her child this past week that I emailed her about. It was an email explaining the issue and asking what she does at home to correct the problem, so we can stay consistent. The email I recieved back from her was not supportive or helpful. It was more or less telling me that her daughter is very smart and she doesn't exibit that behaviour at home so... no suggestions other then to give her 30 minutes of quiet time to read books and seperate herself. Well, no way I can possible do that! So, as I thought about writing up the hour change letter, I realized that for the 2 days a week I get her it's really not worth the hassle. When she started with me, the understanding was that it was 10 hour days, and the odd time it would be 12 hours. But it's turned out to be more 12 hours and the odd 10 hour. And they're not consistent days so she's not on a great schedule. There's always a struggle somewhere. If she was full time I'd spend more time working on it, but for 2 days a week, not worth it! And they're 2 fluctuating days. So, I can't even fill the rest of the week. It's a waste of a space.

Yeah, I wouldn't waste my time on that either! Good luck!

I did it! It was nerve racking, but I did it. It's hard to tell someone you can't do it anymore. Especially when you know how much they need you. They have a very difficult schedule and I know I'm one of the very few caregivers in the area that would put up with it. So, I know they will have a hard time finding alternate care. But I have to look out for my business and my family first. I can't fix everyones daycare problems! I'm still awaiting her response. I'm not looking forward to it, but i hope she understands.

Thanks for all of your encouragement and advise.

I'm glad you got that over with before the long weekend so you aren't stressing out over it for days. I think the ladies gave you good advice to be up front and tell the parent about the letter and you always have to remember to be professional when dealing with the parents. There isn't any way I would accept a child into care until 7pm even 2 days a week. I like it that my daycare children are all picked up by 4:30 most days!

4:30 sounds wonderful! 5:30 is comfortable for me. She emailed me tonight and asked me to call her to discuss. Why didn't she just call me??? So i called her back within 9 min, no answer. She hasn't called back.

I waited to get my cheques for the month before I issued the letter. :)