Need Idea to help 3 year old

I have little boy here who is 4 in Summer. He only child so quite babied. His mother on long term disability with Fibromyalgia (not sure I spell that right) and so although she home, she not able to care for child for full day and he been here for about 18 month in full time care.

He used to be manipulative of Mom knowing if he had melt down or refuse co-operate that she was limited in option to deal with. She would have talk him round which could take many hour. This better since in my care and he now understand he not the boss which before, he was and knew it.

Because he babied for so long, he not been forced to push himself. He struggling in learning write his name. Pencil control is terrible. I been working with him on colour simple shapes neatly to help master that skill but I need other idea too.

We tried clipping laundry peg to each other for fine motor skill. Moving little craft balls using spoon to matching colour of plastic eggs that available Easter. Lot little activities like that. But still his writing skill horrible. Not able to copy his name even if I write it for him copy or write it with little dots for letter for him join up.

What else can I try to help this child?

Put his name one letter by one on a window. Tape a paper over it and get him to trace it. I did this on my patio door for my 3 yr old boy to learn his name. Also take what he is interested in and incorporate it into the learning to keep his interest. My guy was batman and cars. I put a letter one at a time on a cookie sheet and he had to roll the car wheels in paint then roll the car on the letter tracing it. Start with fun crafts like this to introduce letters then move to pencil. Start with a fat crayon, marker, pen then pencil. Work your way up.

Obviously, since I don't know this child, and don't have the history with him that you do, I couldn't say for certain, but the things you descibe, don't neccesarily sound like they are from being babied. There could be something else at issue here. If he is struggling because he is refusing to try, and whining just because you are asking something of him, that's different.

What you have described sounds like a child I had here once. Just couldn't recognize shapes or even illustrations (for example, when looking at a drawing of a banana, couldn't tell me what it was. But could from a photo or looking at an actual banana.) So there was no hope for letters at that age. This child wasn't with me long enough for me to see any progress though.

I have some of these letter stencils, the kids use them all the time and I find it does help them to learn the shapes of the letters. (I just have to make sure they are using them the right side up.)
http://www.staples.ca/en/Staedtler-L...9_2-CA_1_20001

It sounds like what you are doing already is good practice for the fine motor skills. I have found some children really struggle with the pincer grasp (the way you hold a pencil) When I see this at 2 and 3, I make sure that I'm watching when they hold anything to keep reminding them to hold it properly, pencils, crayons, markers and even a spoon or fork. So that hopefully, it becomes the habit.

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If he is struggling because he is refusing to try, and whining just because you are asking something of him, that's different.

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This what he doing. He better than he was. He just knew before that this work at home and if he defiant at home, Mom is physically not able to put in time out or make get dressed. She developed pattern of negotiating and it used take hours to even get him in car for small reason like it not the shirt he wanted. He refuse try lot at home and so he behind with some skill because he never bothered trying.

He can recognize shapes, colours, and has good verbal skill but he just resistant to anything he not want do and stubborn in sense he thinks he can wait it out and win. Because eventually Mom needed to have him dressed and in car, he knew that refusing get dressed would eventually mean a reward or bribe for co-operating. He getting better since I spend lot time text supporting Mom when he have tantrum at home. She not able to place in room and was fearful he would hurt himself as he got more cross but Mom did manage let him get on with it and not react as he picked options that normally she would panic about.

He refuse get dressed one day and so she closed bathroom door and sat on floor to wait it out. He climb in bath and she frightened he going slip but she texting me and I told her let him. If he slip, natural consequence of climb in bathtub. He then start tipping out shampoo. Again, I tell her ignore him, he just acting in way to get response. Only word she said in that whole time was repeat instruction for him to get dressed and they not going anywhere until that done. He then try and make her guilty by say he hungry and want breakfast. She just tell him as soon as he dressed, they can do that. Eventually after 3 hour he realize that whatever he did, it not going to change requirement. It take lot of reassurance back and forth me telling her that she had to win this and not give in. He now learning he not rule the roost but he so behind in some thing because he refuse do in past.

To practice small motor or pincer grasp. Let him to pick up items with tweezers/tongs/chop sticks e.g. pom poms, or other small items. Beading, lacing cards, eye droppers with coloured water, spry bottles, water guns.

It may also be completely unrelated and simply coincidental. It may not be behavioural or to do with fine motor skill ability. It's a completely different part of the brain that translates what a person hears or sees and then replicates. It has to go through the working memory and in certain mediums it can be great and others terrible. His inability to write his name or print letters could be a working memory issue or simply a delay which will catch up later on. I'd carry on with the activities you are doing to reinforce the learning. If he is able to verbalize the letters shapes and numbers but not able to write/draw them, I'd hazard a guess that youre barking up the wrong tree and that this is actually a processing issue not a physical or behavioural issue. His acting out could very much be connected to this very issue too.

I been to Dollarstore. We have ice cube tongs so he can practice picking up and moving item. We have letter stencil so he can practice. I find some practice letter ( https://www.pinterest.com/pin/238127899020448443/ ) online so we print off and he can paint over, trace and maybe point with finger to follow line. We see if all this help him. Thank you for ideas.

Thank you. Will try these too.

Could he just not be ready? He is only 3.5yrs right?

I have worked in Kindergarten and there are a LOT of kids that have no concept of letters and numbers. That don't have the ability to cut and write yet. There is nothing wrong with them...they just aren't there yet.

I would think as long as you are providing the opportunity for all these skills he will get it in due time. It may not be until after he starts kindergarten but you have laid the foundation.