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I think you need to sit your husband down right now and ask point blank questions. So sorry he is being stupid, but get answers to your questions and don't take no for an answer. I've been divorced twice and I'm so DONE with men. I wish I knew why they are all such idiots.
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I am sorry that I have no advice. The others have made some fantastic recommendations, though. I would contact a lawyer, even if you weren't legally married. Common law is slightly different, but you will still have to do the "pots and pans" thing (who gets what).
I wish you the very best, my dear. That is a low and dirty-dog way to get the point across though, if I may speak candidly.
:(