I feel like a nag...

Hi ladies,

I opened my daycare a month ago. I have my own children a 3 and 1(boys)and have 2 daycare kids also 3 (boy) and 1 (girl).My 3 year old is not adjusting well.

I feel like all I do is nag the two 3 year olds to play nice and share. I know being a daycare provider you can't always be the friend but I feel like I am nagging so much that I'm not being fun or as nice as I normally am.
Has anyone else felt this way when starting out? Will the kids get better and start playing nicer over time or will I always have to be a nag? It just feels so draining already...

It is really hard for a provider's children to share their home and their toys with random strangers. Especially at such a young age when they cannot withdraw for the endless intrusion into their own space.

Imagine how you would feel if your husband showed up with another person to share your home, who was there for most of your waking time, and were told to be polite to this person after they had been in your home endlessly for a month. That's how your children are feeling.

It will get better but only if you can see it from your children's view point and put in place something to make it easier for them.

Day care toys and day care equipment should never be your children's possessions. So making sure your children's toys stay in an area that is not used for day care, is important. If at all possible, their bedrooms should also remain as their private space. If that means setting up cribs and cots in your room, so be it. Your children must be allowed to retain the possessions they had prior to your business venture and they must be allowed to retain their personal spaces prior to your business venture too.

Next recommendation - at the end of the business day, when the last client child goes, then you have to be their Mommy. This means giving your children your undivided attention for a period of time. Put down the supper prep items and do something with your children. A quick visit to the local play park, but something where you are exclusively theirs for an hour or so.

It is not your 3 year olds responsibility to entertain your 3 year old client. I know it's easy to lump them together based on ages but the reality is, if they were both clients, they might not want to play with each other. There would be times they don't get along, and you would have to deal with that by letting them have their own space at times. It's really hard to step back from the day care provider role in the day time and remember that your daughter still sees you as a mom, and it's really hard to step back into the mommy mode at the end of the day and give your children a break from being with their day care provider.

I know what you mean! I feel the same with two of my daycare girls, both 2. I find that it helps to redirect them separately if they aren't playing nicely together, or give them something special to do together if they aren't playing well with the little ones. I have a stack of sensory bins that get pulled out at those times. Also books can be read quietly alone. Or colouring pages as well. Then I am still a fun friend, and the kiddos are distracted from the issue that was happening.
There are always going to be days though, when it's all you can to to keep your sanity and keep the kids alive ;)

Thanks, these are all great suggestions! The two 3 year olds keep playing together even when they aren't getting along so these ideas will help in redirecting them. Lol, I hate nagging ;)