Potty Trained DCB Pooping in Pants

[wpgmomma0412]

I’ve had this new DCB for a little over a month. He is 3 in a couple of months, & He is & was fully potty trained when I got him. Over the last 2-3 weeks, mom & dad have been telling me that he doesn’t use the toilet to go poop anymore & has been purposely going in his pants & he has not gone in the toilet for a few weeks now. He never had an accident like that here until today.

When I noticed it, it looked like he had been sitting in it for a while because he was playing as he usually does & did not seem uncomfortable AT ALL or gave any clues that he had pooped himself. It’s like he was ok with sitting in his own poop. I also didn’t think to check him like I usually do often with my 2 diapered DCK because he’s already potty trained. A few weeks ago mom also told me that one time at home he made a comment how he “like to poop in my diaper”. I’m wondering if seeing his 2 daycare friends still being in diapers is making him realize he can just go in his pants & not have to go to the toilet. For some reason it’s only poops that he has been doing in his pants, not pee. He uses the washroom regularly to pee but won’t poop in the toilet anymore.

Besides this, he has been his usual self. In fact, he loves coming here so I don’t think it’s stress from new environment causing him to have accidents. When he’s picked up he doesn’t want to leave. Normally for potty training I take kids to the toilet every so often to make sure they go, but I’m not sure how to handle or approach a situation where an already potty trained child that is reverting back to diapering. I know putting a diaper on him will just make it worse, but I told mom that I’ll try take him to the toilet every so often to make sure he goes but if after next week he’s still having accidents I have no choice but to put a diaper on him.

Any insight as to why he’s been doing this & how it should be handled? I should add that this new family is great to work with & fully respect me as a provider so I know if/when I recommend something they would fully follow through.

[ebhappydc]

I think I remember someone suggesting in a previous thread about a similar topic that a situation like this should have the child in the bathroom changing and cleaning themselves completely (although i'd check to make sure they don't come back dirty) and to have a fun activity going on with the rest of the group during the time they're are figuring our their own mess, so they miss out on the cool activity.

[Suzie_Homemaker]

If you/parents are cleaning him up afterwards, there's no incentive for him not to poop in his pants. He's clued in that the younger children don't have the inconvenience to stopping their play to go to the toilet and just soil themselves and therefore, he's up for that. It's way better than missing out.

So while using the toilet is less convenient than soiling himself, you have to make it so soiling himself is the biggest inconvenience of all.

He needs to retrieve his fresh clothing from his bag. He needs to undress himself. He needs to get cleaned up (with you help as is age appropriate). He needs to put his soiled clothes in whatever he's taking them home in. He needs to get his fresh clothes on, wash his hands etc before being able to rejoin the activities. You and parents need to limit the assistance you give with this to just what is necessary to ensure you don't have poop falling from his soiled clothes all over your house. Don't hold open his fresh underwear/pants for him to step into.

No negative comments but you do need to have the conversation that going to the washroom is quickly than all the malarkey of cleaning up an accident. Make sure that the activity going on while he's getting cleaned up is something he would love to be participating in. He has to understand that the only reason he's not playing at the moment, is because he's soiled himself and so until that's sorted out, he isn't available to play. And it's his consequence - not yours, to freshen up. If he was fully toilet trained and if there hasn't been a major event at home (new sibling, parent working away) then it's fully a choice he is making and we all have consequences to our choices.

Having Mom and Dad on board and taking the same approach will shorten the time it takes him to grasp the lesson. But if Mom and Dad and going to do all the clean up, which is faster than the child doing it and no effect on his part, the entire process of making an accident inconvenient will fail. It requires a consistent but kind approach.