Maybe She just misses her kid? . . . . a lot of parents feel guilty that they aren't there 24/7. I would ask her how much she misses her. Sympathize with her and then tell her that THIS is why you are asking about discipline and such. Since she (the mom) can't be there all the time YOU want to help to raise this child the way SHE would want when the kid is in care. She'll open up, you get the info you want. and both parties walk away feeling good about the care the little one gets.