Transitioning :(

[suemaria]

there is a lot left unsaid with what is happening with your transitioning. did the child have part days to transition into your program? did they start cold turkey? what happend during their first days with you? did you discuss with parents what goes on at home, how to transition, what the childs sleep patterns have been up until now? have they even been around many other adults? what other activities did you think of trying while you are preparing meals? is there any interest in the other children in your program for the transitioning child? have you thought of prepping meals ahead so there is little to do until things level out? in my program in encourage the kitchen area and maintain it for safety much like the rest of the designated daycare spaces... i teach the children early on whats acceptable and safe but am always aware of concerns as accidents can happen, they just learn... when transitioning or upon interviewing i suggest allowing children to get use to the environment so that they are at least comfortable and recognize the space, then have them warm up to me. it makes much easier of a transition... plus communicate with your parents... work together to establish what is best, to get to the point in which it works for you and thus the children!!!

[greenborodaycare]

I'm totally confused about the pasta issue. Is she saying pasta is good? not good? I serve pasta a lot! It's probably the healthiest all around balanced food you could possibly serve! Its whole wheat, sauce has about a bazillion vegetables in it not to mention the tomatoes having high fiber and vitamin c content, and kids LOVE it. You lost me after the whole pasta being an issue thing :s

Anywho...transitioni ng is tough and stressful on everyone. Sometimes you just have to dig your heels in and grin and bear it.
I had a child three years ago that cried for six hours a day for two weeks and it was a nightmare and I almost let her go. One day she just stopped and i'm glad i didn't let her go cause she's been her for three years and she calls me aunty now and i have a very good close relationship with her parents. I can't imagine her not being here!

[Crayola kiddies]

If i understand correctly I think the pasta issue was that the parent doesnt want it served at lunch cause it's all the kid will eat without issue and she wants to serve it at dinner..... Hence the parent wants nice quiet dinner times for herself while the caregiver struggles during the day with all the other foods the child won't eat .... That's my take on it ... Not sure if I'm right though

[Spixie33]

If i understand correctly I think the pasta issue was that the parent doesnt want it served at lunch cause it's all the kid will eat without issue and she wants to serve it at dinner..... Hence the parent wants nice quiet dinner times for herself while the caregiver struggles during the day with all the other foods the child won't eat .... That's my take on it ... Not sure if I'm right though

That's what I got from it too.

Apparently this parent was 'appalled' that a daycare provider would serve pasta two times a week when she saw the menu.

I am not sure what pasta refers to. If it is KD or just plain noodles with butter then I can understand that a parent might be iffy but if pasta is whole grainw ith vegetables and beef or chicken tossed in or spaghetti and meat balls that are homemade then I have no idea. Spaghetti is always a kid favorite - it covers a lot of food groups and I can't understand if anyone would have an issue with that.

I guess if someone is serving spaghettios from a can or ravioli from a can then maybe I would question it

I serve pasta but always have meat in it and veggies and I serve some fruit or something alongside most times

[Skysue]

If i understand correctly I think the pasta issue was that the parent doesnt want it served at lunch cause it's all the kid will eat without issue and she wants to serve it at dinner..... Hence the parent wants nice quiet dinner times for herself while the caregiver struggles during the day with all the other foods the child won't eat .... That's my take on it ... Not sure if I'm right though

Bang on that's what I'm thinking!

[Skysue]

there is a lot left unsaid with what is happening with your transitioning. did the child have part days to transition into your program? did they start cold turkey? what happend during their first days with you? did you discuss with parents what goes on at home, how to transition, what the childs sleep patterns have been up until now? have they even been around many other adults? what other activities did you think of trying while you are preparing meals? is there any interest in the other children in your program for the transitioning child? have you thought of prepping meals ahead so there is little to do until things level out? in my program in encourage the kitchen area and maintain it for safety much like the rest of the designated daycare spaces... i teach the children early on whats acceptable and safe but am always aware of concerns as accidents can happen, they just learn... when transitioning or upon interviewing i suggest allowing children to get use to the environment so that they are at least comfortable and recognize the space, then have them warm up to me. it makes much easier of a transition... plus communicate with your parents... work together to establish what is best, to get to the point in which it works for you and thus the children!!!

I prepare hot lunches 90% of the time and I'm sorry but she needs to get used to the way I do things everyday right from the start. If you start catering to them like tip toeing around then it will be expected and I don't believe in that. She did one transition day with Mom prior but lets be serious if it’s going to be difficult on her it will be no matter what.

Today I left her out of the high chair and sat her in a safe corner of the kitchen where she could see me and put a huge basket of toys in front of her and she cried then after 10 minutes she was good! But she still gave me huge fight when I put ther in her high chair. Her screaming was so bad that she upset the other baby.

Her parents say that they don’t cater to her every need but her actions say way different. This is my challenge.

Her nap times and sleep patterens follow mine!

Not to be rude but what program do you suggest I do while I prep lunch?

[Skysue]

That's what I got from it too.

Apparently this parent was 'appalled' that a daycare provider would serve pasta two times a week when she saw the menu.

I am not sure what pasta refers to. If it is KD or just plain noodles with butter then I can understand that a parent might be iffy but if pasta is whole grainw ith vegetables and beef or chicken tossed in or spaghetti and meat balls that are homemade then I have no idea. Spaghetti is always a kid favorite - it covers a lot of food groups and I can't understand if anyone would have an issue with that.

I guess if someone is serving spaghettios from a can or ravioli from a can then maybe I would question it

I serve pasta but always have meat in it and veggies and I serve some fruit or something alongside most times

I serve pasta 2 times a week but only as a side to a full balanced meal. (White cheddar mac and cheese is the only bad one but it's my daughters favourate, she would eat it everyday if she wanted too) Pesto fussili, linguini with alfrado, spagetti with tomato sauce (I hate the clean up) LOL. But due to this little one being part time I have limited pasta to only one day.

[playfelt]

I serve pasta - as lightly buttered noodles and usually a sprinkle of celery seed in the water as it boils or something like that - for whatever reason that is the favourite spice right now.

Pasta is great because it is finger food for the toddlers, can be stabbed with a fork for preschoolers and is usually liked by most kids. I rarely add anything else to it BUT there is a meat and a veggie on the plate. The pasta is the grain serving of the meal. I see nothing wrong with serving pasta alone as at the end of the meal it makes no difference. The kids that would eat just pasta and nothing else are most likely to not eat the pasta with stuff on it so I say serve whatever but don't assume there is a problem with pasta if it just has a bit of butter on it so it doesn't stick together and no other toppings.

I agree the mom is wanting to reserve pasta for herself. I would ignore and serve what you want. Not your fault the child gets it twice in one day.

[Momof4]

I only serve pasta noodles as a side dish too, and REAL pasta, not the kind in a box with enough sodium to kill a family of 10! My daycare children love the boy shape the best, whatever it is really called, and they think they are butterflies. I do the same as playfelt, sometimes just some butter or other times a bit of red sauce. I probably only serve this about once a week as a replacement for the bread item.

There are too many Moms who use the quick KD fix so I would have to wonder if you ladies are right about your suspicions.

[CountryHill]

Although I'm new to home daycare, I do have a strong background working with children from birth to age 6 and transitioning them to daycare settings. It is horrible to listen to a child cry most of the day for weeks on end. It is draining for everyone. But, I do agree with those who say that after sticking it out the child usually becomes a dream to keep on.

Crying is also based on temperment not only learned behaviour. The parents may not give into the child all the time at home, the child just may not be as resilient as others and more emotionally needy. I do encourage you to stick it out for the sake of the child because it will get better. When you terminate a child who is having difficulty adjusting it makes it so much worse for the child at the next place he or she goes.

That being said, not all children are a good match. If the way you run your daycare and your style doesn't match the parents beliefs etc. then maybe this child is not a good fit. Sounds like this parent has you doing all the work so she can coast in the evening. That is not fair!

Tough call, and lots to think about. I commend you for sticking it out this long