Transitioning :(

[KingstonMom]

Good points everyone. I transitioned a 17 month old boy who started Jan 3rd. Boy, was he a nightmare! He didnt cry or scream, but he was a WHINER!!! uggg constant!! I try to forget how bad he was, but I definetly contemplated terming him after 2 weeks, but stuck thru. He is alot better now, but still gets in his whiney moments.

I decided to not give into his whines for attention (he always was happy if I carried him around with me). I agree its best if I just treated him like any other dck and I dont pick them up only to bring them on the changetable or if they got hurt etc. I did assure him he is okay, but also telling him "we dont whine here, you are fine". After a while he totally got the hang of things and plays happily with the others and is a really good eater. No concerns now!

You have put up with it alot longer than I did though...Im not sure i could handle it for that long. My kid was full time also, yours being part time, yes, longer transition time.

If you feel that enough is enough, then by all means, dont feel as though you have to put up with it. Term if you need to. Then next kid could be a dream.

[Cadillac]

You have to learn to tune out the crying. I had a nine month old like this. Serious separation anxiety with me. I couldn't even go pee.
It took months for him to get comfortable. but he is now the happiest child in my daycare, is my own kids best friend/boyfriend.
I had to train him slowly. First he was allowed to follow me everywhere I went ( would even call him to come with me) but he was on the ground, then when he was comfortable i would leave the room for a couple minutes and call to him if he was crying and let him come find me but I wouldn't pick him up I would talk until he stopped, the periods then got longer and longer until he was comfortable and had made some friends.

You have to like the kid though. Lets be honest, we dont have the patience or understanding we need if we just aren't loving this kid. There was something about this boy I loved even though his screams were PIERCING. I was close to letting him go.

I also had the parents do the same thing at home that I was doing here. continuity is KEY!

But if you just cant stand her, she's better off somewhere else anyways

[Skysue]

You have to learn to tune out the crying. I had a nine month old like this. Serious separation anxiety with me. I couldn't even go pee.
It took months for him to get comfortable. but he is now the happiest child in my daycare, is my own kids best friend/boyfriend.
I had to train him slowly. First he was allowed to follow me everywhere I went ( would even call him to come with me) but he was on the ground, then when he was comfortable i would leave the room for a couple minutes and call to him if he was crying and let him come find me but I wouldn't pick him up I would talk until he stopped, the periods then got longer and longer until he was comfortable and had made some friends.

You have to like the kid though. Lets be honest, we dont have the patience or understanding we need if we just aren't loving this kid. There was something about this boy I loved even though his screams were PIERCING. I was close to letting him go.

I also had the parents do the same thing at home that I was doing here. continuity is KEY!

But if you just cant stand her, she's better off somewhere else anyways

She's so freaking cute and sweet! i can take it! LOL

[Sandbox Sally]

"in response to preparing hot lunches 90% of the time... i do this as well but what helps is having much of it precut/prepared in advance"

It is difficult to precut and prepare when you have your own family who need you in the evenings. Many of us work until 5:30 or later, then we clean up, then we make dinner, do homework, get kids ready for bath and bed. When do you suggest we find time to do this precutting/preparing?

"you need as a caregiver to understand children better, be better educated."

Um...are you and Skysue personal friends? How do you know how much education she has, or how well she understand children. I think this is a bold and insensitive statement.

"way too many times, home programs follow regime that is so structured that an adult wouldn't be able to follow or keep up with expectations and people ask that of an infant etc"

Again, are you well acquainted with the original poster? What do you know about her expectations? Some serious insinuations are present here. As a home care provider, I am CERTAIN that my structure is a lot looser than any daycare centre in this large city!

"i am not trying to be offensive"

You may not have been trying, but you certainly ARE. Thanks for your two cents.

[Momof4]

Skysue, I'm transitioning a baby girl who is so cute too but the crying is still making us crazy. She gets a little better every day though thank goodness.

Suemaria: paragraphs please!

[mom-in-alberta]

Suemaria: you are relatively new to this forum, I believe? I'll give you the benefit of the doubt, but please re-read your post. It came off incredibly abrasive and high handed. Not very helpful, which is what we providers are supposed to be for each other.

Skysue: no new advice, but what Flex suggested seems like a great idea! (Gradual, coached independence)
Best of luck with this!!

[Skysue]

Suemaria: you are relatively new to this forum, I believe? I'll give you the benefit of the doubt, but please re-read your post. It came off incredibly abrasive and high handed. Not very helpful, which is what we providers are supposed to be for each other.

Skysue: no new advice, but what Flex suggested seems like a great idea! (Gradual, coached independence)
Best of luck with this!!

The Gradual, coached method is going amazing! Cheers!

[DisneyPrincess]

I have that crying all the time problem with a future full time darling, shes only 10 months so its hard for her of course, good thing that she started the transition now 2 days a week before mom goes back to work. We started out 2 hours a day, now its half a day, next week we'll try full day. Now Im off on vacation for 2 weeks in march and Im afraid when I come back and she starts full time, all this transition will have been for nothing and have to start over after my vacation... :\ At first she didnt want me near her, talk to her or even look at her... she would scream and cry hahaha... at least now she wants to be in my arms, but I am slowly trying to let her down so she can unvelcro herself to me and start playing with the friends or on her own :O Poor doll is exhausted from crying, my (for now) two other kids are so sweet with her and dont seemed bothered by her crying. Hope it will only get better as I have more kids starting also after my vacation