Sometimes people in her situation and profession forget that WE OWN THE DAYHOME. I would sit down, and let her know that while you understand her need to know about the kid's day --that building a trust relationship is key here, and that you feel that you are not trusted, and that bugs you; Tell her that without trust she is doing her little one a dis service, because her little guy will sense that...however you'd like to phrase that. Because in the end you want to be this little guys "buddy" right?
In my dayhome parents ask how long kid A napped, what his/her mood like and if I need anything by way of changes of clothes wipes etc..it takes maybe 5 mins or so...nothing like this. THIS IS NOT NORMAL
As for the food I serve what I serve end of story, my handbook states that if you want alternatives (parents) you (parents) must provide them. Pretty black and white there.
If she feels the need to do this then she needs a nanny. IMHO.
Hope that helps.
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