Referrals - love em or hate em?

[Sandbox Sally]

Strange that the distance thing has come up. There is a woman on my street who has contacted me about daycare for August, and we have emailed back and forth a few times. I was out for a walk with the kiddies today and a woman stopped me and asked if I was "Alphaghetti" and I said yes, and she said, "oh hi, I'm Blahblah! We've been corresponding about child care". I found the whole thing to be rather disconcerting. I felt almost violated, her having seen me while I was not at my best etc.

I also find it a little irritating that one of my families lives the next street over. Sometimes in the summer, friends and I will have a few drinks on my porch, and sometimes when I have drinks, I smoke. I never smoke when daycare children are here. EVER. But I always feel like I am on guard...like I have to be professional, even when I am on my own time. I don't like it.

[lunademiel]

Such a good point. I must say that on our walks every day I wonder if all the parents are "watching" me with the LO's. Kind of creepy. Plus ya, on a weekend, we might have more fun then I want my parents to see... But really I hope that they would understand that as providers we are free to have some fun too!

[Inspired by Reggio]

I here ya ... I have always been bound by the moral turpitude clauses in my employment as a an ECE working in centres not to mention having spent most of my career either working in lab schools where the 'two way mirror' meant you were constantly being watched or in centres with video over the Internet and so forth and now with the College of ECE even though I am self employed still bound even more by the Code of Conduct with that.

I have always felt since graduation that I have to present that professional face in public even after hours and on weekends - well at least 'outside of my home' where others might see me or in today's day in age be sporting some camera to video tape any wild behaviours so it eventually just becomes that way of life regardless of where I am - I am always the Designated Driver when we go 'out' so I do not have to worry about making a poor choice in public that could get me in trouble and my friends and family are always so shocked if I so much as 'swear' because I am so use to having to always be 'professional' so they know I am really upset when swear words come out either that or it is time to cut me off when we are at home hanging out on the weekend cause I grow a trailer park mouth with every ounce of booze that enters my mouth - hence why I always DD when we go out

However the whole coming by your HOME to scope you out before an interview and uninvited THAT would be a huge red flag for me ... while I get that we are caring for peoples children, that clients need to do due diligence in ensuring that we are 'good people' that borders on STALKING a provider cause this is also our HOME where we should feel safe to let our hair down when not working and so forth and as long as our personal life does not put our clientele in any danger it is non of their business if we have a few drinks or are a social smoker and so forth.

[Momof4]

I know some providers who I love and admire and are wonderful who have signs on their yard and on their van for their daycare for advertising, but I don't think I would ever want to do that. I say this because a woman who lived in the house next to me came over one day to ask about my daycare because she saw us outside all the time. Thankfully I was full and could tell her that I couldn't help her. She would NOT have been a good client.

I prefer a more distant relationship as well and want people to know that I am a businesswoman here. I did open my daycare in the first place because somebody was saving a space for my daughter and let her down by giving the space away which caused lightning to strike me to give me a new purpose in life. I hated my old job at a medical laboratory and this is the best thing that ever happened to me! I see that daycare provider occasionally but have no respect for her at all and she always acts as though she doesn't know me even though she knows me and my daughter and my grandson. People are so weird!

Anyway, my daughter was a wonderful client but I gave her a reduced rate and I'm making lots more money with my new clients since my grandson went to JK but I miss them terribly! But I can definitely see why people recommend NOT taking on friends, neighbours or relatives.

[Judy Trickett]

I do not take clients who live on my street. Just won't do it. I don't like the feeling of having to be "on" all the time. What I do on MY time is MY business. I also don't like to have neighbours, once again, due to the possibility of termination.

[lunademiel]

Oh man, I have a lot to learn...

[jodaycare]

I have had tons of referrals and some have panned out and others haven't. I truly appreciate them but I don't reward the referring parent. In this business especially, word of mouth is extremely important.

[Judy Trickett]

I have had tons of referrals and some have panned out and others haven't. I truly appreciate them but I don't reward the referring parent. In this business especially, word of mouth is extremely important.

I think it really depends on where you live. If you live in a big city the word of mouth is not really that important. I rarely get families in care who know each other. If anything other providers are a better referral source than past or present dcfamilies.

I have had two different incidences wherein one family left all on their own due to a change of circumstance and then another family I had to terminate and both times another dcfamily (who was either friends or family if the client leaving care) ended up leaving too. It's just too risky to me to have people in care who know eachother.

Heck, I don't even like to take on siblings because of the financial risk. If you are only allowed five kids in care then siblings are 40% of my income. When they up and leave that is A LOT of money lost per week until I fill that spot. The same goes for clients who are friends with each other outside of my daycare.

I can honestly say that it took me a long time to become business savvy. And, also being brutally honest here, but in the last year I lost a bit of my savvy and it was one of the worst years for turnover I have EVER had. And I know deep down that it was my own fault. I broke my OWN rules about siblings, taking people you know or who know eachother, taking on people in your neighbourhood, or, on the other hand, taking families who live far away (the drive gets old).

You only have to get hit by the swing, yet again, for not following your own wisdom to remind you of how business always has to be first and foremost in your mind in the field of daycare.

[jodaycare]

Most of the referrals I have got are after someone has left my care, so losing two families at once has never really been a problem, for me anyway. In recent years, most of my new clients have been referrals. I can see though how you can get hit by the swing in these situations.