I haven't had to deal with it myself (yet) but I'm a tough love kinda person too. I mean I'd hold you but if I have to prep food, change another diaper then if you're crying then.....you're crying. At my weekly playgroup there is a 13mos old like this. His mother babywears him at home not to deal with the crying but the provider has 4 other under 3.5yrs old.....she can't hold him all day. So us other ladies take turns during the playdate taking him to the other end of the room....distracting with a toy and go back to our area....all while his dcp is hiding from his sight. It's strting to go on 2hrs before he notices he hasn't been in her arms and freaks! LOL it's getting much better though.....and this has been a battle since he was 10mos old!

Hang in there is all I've got for you ((hugs))