Frustrated and hitting himself!!

[Inspired by Reggio]

I agree - it is a stage where they often do not have the language to express their emotions and as a result they 'need' another outlet for that frustration and anger - it is a real emotion and they cannot just 'turn it off' so to speak ... my suggestion would be to offer and outlet 'I can see your frustratted / angry but we do not hit people or throw things ... if your angry you can (insert what you are comfortable allowing him to release his anger on).

Some things that work are those little 'tool benches' where you hammer the peg one way flip it over and hammer the other, a play doh centre with meat tenderizers at it for pounding, punching a pillow - for those who throw things when angry - a angry station where you can throw bean bags into a garbage can until you feel better .... you get my point find some 'socially acceptable' manner to release that negative energy in a manner that he can easily learn to 'self regulate' to when those emotions arise for him.

Sometimes the message 'we dont do that' is not enough when they need help in finding an outlet where they CAN do it otherwise they internalize those emotions ... hence him now hitting himself ... cause he is struggling with the need to hit SOMETHING because he is frustrated and learning ok I cannot hit them so I will hit myself to feel better.

I do the same thing with 'hair pullers' .... kids who are fascinated with hair and pulling at everyone's as a result - redirect them to one of those bodyless Barbie dolls or get a wig from the Value Village and tell them you CAN PULL THAT if you need to feel hair - but leave your friends alone!

[Littledragon]

He has some anger problems, and is having trouble expressing himself. Time outs will DEFINITELY work if he is hitting others. I have a 1 year old screamer and one week of time outs worked. And he's one. But you have to be consistant. EVERY TIME he hits someone he needs to be in a time out. You should sit him down for his time out and then softly talk to him about why he is there. And then ask him questions. Why does he feel he needs to hit people? Why is he hitting himself? Talk to him about other ways that he can let out his anger, show him what he can do to express himself. They understand more than we thing. But I definitely think time outs are a good idea. I am pro time outs lol

[jec]

Thanks again ladies ! I apreciate your input!!