Why are they hiding....

[zen39]

There is still five months to go...lots of time for her to share the news and NO it is not your business right now. Does your contract say that five months has to be given for notice...of course not. You probably request 4 to 6 weeks so that you can post, interview and fill. Yes it is a huge inconvenience but her pregnancy is none of your business.

We need to separate the personal from the business. If I was closing down my daycare and knew well in advance, I certainly wouldn't inform my parents 5 months in advance. I would give them my 6 weeks as stated in the contract.

Sure it would be nice to know ahead of time, but by no means are you entitled to it as this point!

Sorry, I don't agree with that - When you are affecting my financial situation, it IS my business.

[Crayola kiddies]

I agree she doesn't have to tell you ..... So I would say she is either not telling you because she is either not taking her child out and therefore no change needs to be made or she is keeping her child home with her during mat leave and she's afraid you will fill her spot now and give her notice .... So if you only ask for two weeks written notice to end care then that's all she's required to give you. But if it bothers you that much then say "Susie says she's going to be a big sister congrats ". Then its out in the open. Then you could say are you keeping Susie in care while you are on leave or should I start advertising for fall? There's nothing wrong with that and then you would have your answer. Then I would advertise anyway just in case

[Littledragon]

There is still five months to go...lots of time for her to share the news and NO it is not your business right now. Does your contract say that five months has to be given for notice...of course not. You probably request 4 to 6 weeks so that you can post, interview and fill. Yes it is a huge inconvenience but her pregnancy is none of your business.

We need to separate the personal from the business. If I was closing down my daycare and knew well in advance, I certainly wouldn't inform my parents 5 months in advance. I would give them my 6 weeks as stated in the contract.

Sure it would be nice to know ahead of time, but by no means are you entitled to it as this point!

I agree with Mamma_mia. It may not be "her business" but it comes down to lack of respect. Mom should have the respect and understanding to know that she should be telling her daycare provider that she's pregnant. It's not fait to anyone that what will happen is unclear. I just found out one of my families is pregnant, and that she was pregnant when the little boy started and that they've been aware of it the entire time. She's 20 weeks pregnant and just telling me now. I feel cheated, lied to, and disrespected. If they'd told me in the beginning, I wouldn't be upset and I wouldn't have shown them the door.
The woman who is hiding her pregnancy is being disrespectful and a coward. Clearly, she's afraid of the consequences of telling. And she's probably having just as much stress about it because she's afraid that if she says anything, they're going to lose their daycare provider. But their daycare provider is worried that she will be left out in the cold.
Personally, at this point, I would be letting them go. Mom has to realize that word spread, her kids not dumb, and neither is the daycare provider.
The minute I find a replacement, I'm letting my family go out of principle. And I'm going to tell them that I'm letting them go because she lied to me, and purposely kept vital information from me. It's great that they told me now, when I still have 4 months to find someone to replace them, but the fact remains that they were DISHONEST and I don't associate with people like that

And yes, there is DEFINITELY difference here between business and personal, but we work SO closely with these people, that the two tend to mesh into one and it's unavoidable. But this is a business issue. Especially since it's slow at the moment, and finding clients take time. The fact that she isn't saying anything, and it's clearly OBVIOUS, is just ridiculous in my mind. If I was working at a regular job, and waited until I was 8 months pregnant to tell my boss I was pregnant and going on Mat leave in 4 weeks, they would be EXTREMELY unhappy. You actually HAVE TO tell your boss by the time you're 20 weeks pregnant. Why should this be any different?

Those are my two cents.

[michellesmunchkins]

There is something in the water where I live because everyone is telling me they are pregnant. I had one family tell me they were pregnant at 4 months ( a week after their 1 year old started) and another just tell me that she is 3 months pregnant ( I've had her daughter for almost a year). I have 2 off on mat leave with their second now. The first family has kept their son with me for the mat leave ( 2 days a week) while the other family is choosing to withdraw their little guy to be home with them.

I would of course prefer to know asap if a family is expecting and what they are thinking they will do in regards to daycare, but the reality is that its their decision when to tell me. I have a 2 week withdraw policy so in essence they could wait until 2 weeks before delivery to say, hey I'm pregnant and taking my child out of daycare. Of course we can see sooner by the baby bump but they really don't HAVE to tell anyone until they are comfortable.

Its not always about respect. A lot of time they fear that we will terminate them sooner than they need, sometimes its a high risk pregnancy and they are only telling certain people until they are sure its a viable pregnancy...and sometimes they really don't 'get' that they should tell us sooner rather than later. Personally, I would say that the older sibling told you and congratulate her...gets it out in the open and then you can discuss her options for daycare.

The longer you let it fester, the longer and the more it upsets you. It seems to be really upsetting you and that's not good for you. This is a hard enough job. I would just come right out and say congrats and go from there...they are going to decide to do whatever is best for them and there is nothing we can do to change that as providers...its just a risk we take in the job.

I pretty much convince myself that anyone who comes to daycare with their first child will be off within a year to have the second...that way its not so much of a shock when it happens lol

[Mamma_Mia]

I agree with both points LD & MM - I guess I'm taking it a bit harder because she isn't trying to hide the bump, shes wearing tight tshirts and babydoll tops that really really show the bump. Then there is the fact that she talk about ti openly on her facebook page (which has no privacy settngs so someone like me who is NOT on her friends list can see/read it all). She has over 500 'friends' and I can guarentee not all of them are CLOSE friends, also due to her daughters health issues she has lots of 'support grops' who have said "congrats! thats great news, we havent seen ***** since she was 8 months old and now shes going to be a big sister, how nice" the kid is now 3yrs old...... She texts me during the day to bash her boss or manager and talk about weekend plans, at PU or DO she spends 10min chatting with me..........but can't tell me the obvious that she's pregnant.

Weird = yes!
Rude & Disrespectful = in MY opinion yes!

Oh and at this point with her due date moved up she's 19 weeks along now...

[Crayola kiddies]

Maybe she just assumes you know

[michellesmunchkins]

Sounds like you have a really close relationship with her, almost to the point of friends? I can totally understand why you are having a hard time with it. It is so hard not to become friends with our clients and its almost like a slap in the face that she will tell everyone else and not you, yet feels comfortable enough to tell you about all other aspects of her life. I'm sorry you have to go through this Maybe she really is afraid to tell you...seems really weird that she will tell you everything else and not something so important as this. I would just come right out and let her know that you know now. Is there a chance she thinks she has told you or that you would know by facebook?