Ummm - I think you handled it fine!

Your child is not 'violent' she is a toddler whose only skills at this point are fight or flight response she was born with ... and while it is not SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE to behave in the manner it is developmentally normal for this age - and until we give them the skills and resources to move beyond those developmental limitations 'incidents' of mistakes are going to happen where they might act like a little caveman they are innately wired to be .... ALL children are innately wired with either a flight or fight response or combination of both depending on circumstances ... it is no more their fault than being born with blonde hair or green eyes


So until they develop the language and conflict resolution skills needed to deal with things like someone snatching their toy things like this will happen on occasion - it is a part of childhood and ideally it is a short lived part that they quickly learn 'better' choices however we also must accept as caregivers that some kids learn faster than others.

Applying such negative words to children is over reaction IMO .... how would that client/friend feel if you referred to their child as a THIEF cause in reality that too is an adjective you could use to describe their taking something that is not theirs ... would that not be an overreaction too?

Our role as caring adults is to help NURTURE children to make better choices with each other and help them learn the socially acceptable strategies for dealing with anger, frustration and other 'negative' emotions that we ALL HAVE AS HUMANS!

I agree that if they are going to make a mountain out of a SCRATCH than group care might not be for them ... because honestly I have had kids scratch THEMSELVES in care!

I have empathy for you I worked in centre care where irate parents whose child was 'bitten' demanded that we EXPEL the child from care if their parents were not going to 'fix' their kid and when we could not do that than they wanted us to put a muzzle on the offending child to ensure they never did it again ... the child was 15 months old and teething ... some people just do not have a firm or realistic grasp of childhood development Ironically when THEIR kid hit that stage 3 months late and was biting THEM at home and drawing blood cause he latched on like a dog and would not let go suddenly they were much more 'understanding' of biting and how it was not always the 'lack of discipline' in the home that caused it