New and need advice !

[mom-in-alberta]

I would also take that approach... not that you think they are negligent in not seeking more attention for it, but that you just need the verification that it's nothing contagious.
Has he had any allergy testing? This kind of insanely dry skin/excema, etc usually comes hand in hand with severe allergies, usually to something dietary. I would suggest to mom and dad to get him tested. The testing method now is MUCH better than even a few years ago.

[crafty]

Thank you all !!! I mostlikely will give her a form to have filled out by her doctor. It's just really really bad and WHAT IF it is communicable or that the current cream is doing harm which I seriously beleive it is ... I still dont think the mom lied but I just don't get that the doctor would approve a cream like this and this little guy NEEDS to be treated at this point. If this is what I need to do to cover my ASSETS then that's what I'll do.

Once again thanks guys ! I was afraid of beeing to fussy about the issue but you have validated that in this case it was OK

[Skysue]

Thank you all !!! I mostlikely will give her a form to have filled out by her doctor. It's just really really bad and WHAT IF it is communicable or that the current cream is doing harm which I seriously beleive it is ... I still dont think the mom lied but I just don't get that the doctor would approve a cream like this and this little guy NEEDS to be treated at this point. If this is what I need to do to cover my ASSETS then that's what I'll do.

Once again thanks guys ! I was afraid of beeing to fussy about the issue but you have validated that in this case it was OK

Dairy products cause most cases of eczema. How about working with the Mom in keeping a food diary. Try and see what it is that he might be eating or drinking that could be causing the problem. Then through the process of elimination you may find a solution.

Cutting out all dairy maybe the answer, there are plenty of non-dairy yogurts, cheeses and drinks available that provide a great source of protein and calcium.

[crafty]

Dairy products cause most cases of eczema. How about working with the Mom in keeping a food diary. Try and see what it is that he might be eating or drinking that could be causing the problem. Then through the process of elimination you may find a solution.

Cutting out all dairy maybe the answer, there are plenty of non-dairy yogurts, cheeses and drinks available that provide a great source of protein and calcium.

It could very well be related to allergies. I know the father has some allergies. I have told them about it but they just seem to do nothing. In my opinion this little guy does not have a very well balanced diete either but that I can't do anything about.

I just dont understand why would the doctor not give them better instructions to help their child but then again maybe I am not getting all the info. from the parents. I still dont think they would purposly whithold information. They are very young parents so ... I don't want to make any judgement on them I just really want to ensure he gets what he needs. Half his legs and arms are covered in scabs, open wounds and severe irritation and when I say half ... I really mean %50. It looks so painfull.

Thanks to all, I have been working on a form to have the doctor fill out all last evening. If anyone has a sample I could check out, I would appreciate it.

[Inspired by Reggio]

...I just dont understand why would the doctor not give them better instructions to help their child but then again maybe I am not getting all the info. from the parents.....

Sadly like every field there are Dr at the bottom and top of their field, Dr who are passionate about their work and Dr who are burnt out and not giving things their 'all' so to speak ... sadly based on my experience with Health Care, at least in Ontario, it would not surprise me in the least if their Dr told them having skin like this was 'normal' and not be concerned in the least about WHY it is like that (aka an allergy to something) and address that but rather just treat the SYMPTOM verses the CAUSE cause this is the current 'doctrine' in Canada ... why CURE the skin rash when you can make hordes of money in topical creams treating the 'symptom'.

Sorry for the rant - as someone whose suffered with skin issues since childhood with no one able to explain to my WHY and just keep pushing more and more DRUGS at me it frustrates me that when I was wee no one thought to look at my DIET as a root cause .... I ended up as an adult finding out I have Celiac and only because I kept PUSHING to find out why I had the issues I did ... if this were MY child I would want to know WHY and would be taking the diet back to basics and seeing what 'helped or made it worse' and than avoiding those issues. Seriously if the 'outside skin' is being affected like this by something just imagine what is happening on the INSIDE of the body and the stress being created there????

[crafty]

So I gave the parents a medical treatment to be filled out to the parents. I told them that I was mostly worried about other families also being afraid that it could be communicable. I do not have other families attending at this time but I do have playdates with the one registered for september. Not that I talk about the medical conditions of the kids but it is visible. I also stated that I wanted to ensure I was providing the proper care. They seem to understand.

The next day, they FINALY provided some polysporin which WAS reccomended by the doctor not scented baby cream. Anyway I still told them that I would not use ANY products until I had the medical form. A few days later the scabs had been getting better but still did not fix teh ski problems anyway. He still itched and scrathed everywhere. I mentioned the form a few times during the following days. I strongly suspect they did not even call the doctors office.

Now I told them they had 2 weeks ( today would be the deadline) to return the signed form. I received nothing and no mention of it this morning. So ... What to do ? He is my only income right now, there as been other issues with this family like failling to provide the proper supplies after many warnings, not sticking to pick up times and one more thing I have never metionned to them however but it does grind my gears ... She often tell me she finished at 3h00pm and picks him up at 5h25 ! I had chosen not to say anything at first because, once in a while I could undertsand but now it happens almost every week.

So what to do ? Is this enough to terminate ? I knwo I am goign to have a discussion with teh mom tonight but ... I still not sure what to do. The child himself is great, not major issues with him.

Any advice ladies ??

[Crayola kiddies]

Well you have to decide how much you need his income versus how much of an aggregation he is. You gave them a deadline and they have failed to meet it. It's not unreasonable to take your child to a dr and have him checked out and give you verification that he is safe to be with other children. The other issues such as not bringing necessary supplies and failure to pick up at contracted times have gone unchecked so she probably figures you will let thus slide as well. I would not be treated that way in my home/business and I would have their things at the door with an immediate termination letter for when they decide to pick up. I would tell them that due to their failure to comply with the rules set out in the contract ( supplies and continual lateness) and failure to return the required form and just a general air of disrespect towards your business that you have no choice but to terminate the contract. Then hand her the letter which will have all of what you said in it. She will realize in a hurry that you mean business. But if you let this slide she will never respect you or your business. ..... I understand that this is your only dck at the moment but is it worth being treated the way she treats you? Only you can answer that. Good luck

[crafty]

Thanks Crayola !! I really do need the income right now but at the same time I really want to be appreciated. The work we do and effort we put in is very demanding. I want to be flexible when I can but I do not want to be taken advantage of. When I have bent the rules for them, I did tell the mother that it was only because at the time, I did not have other children that would be affected by it and could manage it. I realise I'm responsible for that and agree.
But the parents have signed a very detailed policy document. In the long run, this is not the type of family I want to work with. But still, I find myself not beeing able to make the decision. I like the little dude, I can't afford to loose the income, my kids like him but I value myself and the service I give way above what I'm getting in return . Since we are closed next week for renos, I'm thinking to give them an extension but the form must be submitted first thing once daycare is open. I will also clearly advise mom that there will be no more flexibilities, one more strike and you are out. Should I put this in a letter you think ?

[Inspired by Reggio]

Should I put this in a letter you think ?

Anything that could result in 'termination' I always do in writing and I make two copies of it - they sign receipt of BOTH one for their records and one for MINE so they can not later claim they were not 'aware' of the expectations

Personally - unless my income was needed for a STAPLE like the roof over our heads I would do what needed to be done to my budget to allow for the loss of income if the client was making me think about termination on that level and making be feel under valued and taken advantage of - life is too short - I have one I muse about being DONE with but they only have 2 months of care before being naturally done with and in reality they pay on time, supply what they need and so forth it is just that they are not EASY to work with that's for sure.

However I have always been one to put my quality of life about financial things ... I have always trusted that my 'financial needs' will be met in one way or another .... I once took a job working in a factory because I felt burnt out in this field and needed a change and well partially because I was feeling 'undervalued' for the amount of work I was doing for the company ... the factory job paid $6 more an hour than my current job and was a job a MONKEY could do it was so repetitive and brainless so I thought 'oh awesome what I could do with all that EASY money' .... however I HATED it ... the people were horrible and lazy and did nothing but complain about not being paid enough for the work - the work was so mundane I would be falling asleep standing up at my station - I felt so bored and unhappy and well that the work had no meaning despite the pay it was not 'enough' cause it was affecting my mental and physical well being ... I quit that job without even having a new one lined up and ended up going back to working in centre care for not only less than I was making in the factory but less than I had been making before I took the factory job because it was a new company and I lost my seniority ... it was a financial adjustment however I had never been HAPPIER and in the long run that is what matters in life because being stressed and unhappy does damage to your body that no amount of $$ can repair!