That's where I am torn...

there is the right/moral thing to do to stick to the original commitment and stand united in womanhood since she is preggo Been there and of course I can empathize with where she is coming from. It is a happy time for her to plan her family.

Then again - option 1 only is worth about 5 months of income and could be less if the mom gets put on bedrest or medical leave and I need to also think of it as a business.

option 2 covers my butt financially and might be safer in the long run.

I don't blame the mom for not telling me sooner because she would have already known when she initially made contact with me. She has no obligation to tell me....But at that time I had someone else also wanting the spot who was a great match and I declined them for the sake of mother #1. In retrospect that hurts a bit because I felt a real connection with that original mom before the referral mom. The mom at that time knew I had someone else interested but of course it was in her best interest to keep quiet because I probably would have decided differently.

I guess having two people to choose from isn;t the worst problem one could have but it still sucks and is confusing