Anti-Oppressive Policy

[Inspired by Reggio]

...I had a little boy once who wanted to dress up as a princess and I didn't allow it, as I didn't want to offend his parents or make them think I encouraged it? It's so weird what is considered socially acceptable....

There are cultures all over the world where men wear 'dresses / kilts / etc' so yes boys DO and can wear dresses .... for children wearing a princess dress is not about gender but about feeling magical in the fabric that generally feels awesome on the skin - fabric that manufacturers generally only made available in gender stereo typed FEMALE options so boys are robbed of that sensation by our lack of foresight about child development - it is that silky flowing feeling that boys often think feels like a magic cape that can make them fly they are not wearing that and dreaming of growing up and being a cross dresser and so forth and well even if they WERE so what they are just CLOTHES they do not define the strength and conviction of the HUMAN inside them

My daycare boys wear the princess dress all the time and I do not discourage it and if I have a client who is uncomfortable with it I remind them that the program they signed on for is emergent and follows the child's lead and interests - as long as what they are doing is safe and does not put them or others in harms way I do not STOP play and this is part of his play - I also explain that developmentally it is not about gender identity or sexuality at 3 years old it is about imagination and feeling magical and more often than not they are not pretending to be 'female' at all and even if they DO take their play in that direction what an awesome way for a boy to explore gender roles as he sees them through his eyes and develop empathy for his mothers and sisters and learn to be a better man, husband and father some day by having walked in their shoes as a child in his play

It is natural for human beings - specially children - to categorize their world to make sense of it ... children with budding language do things like anything with 4 legs is called whatever the first animal they are exposed to and this goes on for the longest time where everything of that characteristic is a 'dog' or whatever until they learn to create more 'categories' of understanding. Therefore children make 'categorizations' including things like 'boys only where blue and play with toys and trucks' and 'girls only wear pink and play with princesses and cook in kitchen sets' and other gender stereotypes in our society because this is what they are exposed to in media, how business 'target' toys and learning things and so forth - we definitely need to BREAK that cycle with future generations .... celebrate the ways we truly ARE different because the sexes ARE different ... only women can actually 'bare' and naturally 'feed' infants yes and that is a special gift for us but we BOTH can be equal in every other way .... aside from that fundamental difference the sexes are and should be treated equal ... while some things might come 'easier' to certain people based on their size and stature or others that might be 'harder' based on the same there is no feat that either sex cannot DO if properly motivated