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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    158 Times in 129 Posts

    Help my 4 year old refuses to write her name?


    My DD is 4 and will be starting school in Sept. She can say her ABC’s and she knows them phonetically as well. She can read basic words and can count to 50; she can identify numbers to twenty.

    She knows close to 50 kid’s songs and can sing all the Tangled songs by heart, so cute. She knows a few rhymes and riddles.

    She is very social as well and plays really good with others. The one thing I can’t seem to get her to do is write her name, she just refuses. She can write a few letters but completely shuts down when I ask her to try and write her name. I feel like a total failure as they have asked us to try our best to get them to do it before school starts in Sept.

    I just learned that cutting with scissors is a skill that helps there fine motor writing so I have introduced that as a game in the daycare, we make beds for pets by cutting paper and we cut out pictures to clue in scrapbooks, she isn’t great but she is getting there.

    Any tips ladies on what I should do to get her interested in writing? I don’t want to force her as it can make her not want to learn all together. It is really frustrating to watch her shut right down.
    Last edited by Skysue; 06-22-2012 at 12:43 PM.

  2. #2
    Euphoric !
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    599 Times in 439 Posts
    Honestly, I think they push the kids too hard too early these days! My son is 4 and will be in JK in September as well and has been in 5 day a week half day preschool this year and he can't even write any letters (except for a wobbly O). He loves to do creative art and loves books etc, but I am relly not keen on pushing things on him yet if he isn't ready. I didn't start school until I was 6 and I learned to read and write very quickly at that time, not before. I wouldn't stress about it!

  3. #3
    Euphoric ! Inspired by Reggio's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    946 Times in 686 Posts
    I empathize hon - I have felt the same way when I have children in my program and I have offered them all the same 'access' to materials and exposure to opportunities to master these things and some have got it by 2 and others are heading off to school not interested at all and you think it is going to be some 'personal reflection' of your skill - but it is NOT ... you can lead a horse to water but you cannot force them to drink and trying to will only cause the horse not to want to drink ever again cause the experience was not pleasant

    Honestly they have until the END of kindergarten to master these things .... in a classroom setting children often become motivated by their peers instead of the teacher ... so do not sweat it children learn at different paces because they are all interested and motivated by different things ... she will get there
    Children construct their own intelligence. The adult must provide activities and context, but most of all must be able to listen. Children need proof that adults believe in them. Their three great desires are to be listened to, to understand, and to demonstrate that they are exactly what we expect."
    Loris Malaguzzi

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  5. #4
    Euphoric !
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    949 Times in 781 Posts
    Don't worry about a thing! I have 4 year old children who go off to school writing the entire alphabet and some that won't even try. The JK teachers know how to get them to concentrate long enough to learn things like that. I have a grandson who is just finishing JK and he still writes some letters backwards and is very stubborn about it but it's a big improvement because he wouldn't stop long enough to try at my daycare.

  6. #5
    Euphoric !
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Ottawa, Ontario
    1,469 Times in 1,125 Posts
    Make sure you have her eyes checked. There is a lot more finesse work required to actually write the letter than to just identify the outline of it. Once my daughter got her glasses she started to concentrate more on books and letters and stuff because the eye strain was gone.

    I have three heading off to school in Sept. One prints letters, numbers, knows them etc. but his abilitiy to play is barely there and is social skills are deplorable. But he comes across as prepared to his parents because he can print. Another one barely draws any shapes let alone letters but socially he is adept and his interest in learning - science especially is astounding. The third one is somewhere in the middle although he is well rounded just a bit slower in grasping all areas but making steady progress which is all I expect. Kindergarten teachers expect kids to have a variety of skills. Also remember this is June and September is two months away and think back to what she knew two months ago and know there is still time.

    Impress upon her that the reason for writing her name is so that the teacher will know what picture she made or what craft she did or what group she wants to sign up for. Recognizing her name is the other important part too. If nothing else help her to learn her initials so that she can at least put that on her pages. The rest will come with time.

  7. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Whitby, ON
    137 Times in 119 Posts
    IMO - I don't know many 4 year olds who start school knowing how to write anything properly. They do by the end of the year....but not to start. I'd say give the KID a break
    Satisfaction Guaranteed or Double Your Kids Back!!

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