ANOTHER Potty Training Question!

[sunnydays]

I think actually that you and Reggio are probably more similar than different....except for the assumptions that the disipline strategies are based upon. I know that Reggio also believes in guiding children and teaching them the right way to behave and I am certian she is not sitting back and waiting for them to learn these things on their own. I think where you differ is in the underlying thought process behind it. I tend to agree more with Reggio that children "want" to please us and "want" to behave in a socially acceptable way and that is where we come in to help them understand what that "acceptable" way of behaving is so that they can begin to regulate their own behaviour rather than waiting for a punishment to given to them. I truly don't believe at all that children are born "evil" or "bad" in any way. In fact I believe we teach them how to behave in how we react to them...they cry we pick them up...we have taught them that crying is the way you get picked up...etc. I also don't believe that infants and toddlers "manipulate" us. They simply respond to the world as it responds to them. "If I don't want to eat my dinner, my mom will give me peanut butter and bread, so I'll wait for that because I like it better"....this is not manipulation, it is learned behaviour that has been taught through the parent's actions, not their words.

In response to inspired by reggio. on kids wanting to make the right choices but not having the skills or resources.
I believe as the Bible states: children are all born evil. sounds rough but is true, think about it...they are from the beginning of life naturally selfish & manipulating. They dont want to make the right choices, they dont know what they are until we show them and we cant show them unless we correct their inherantly "wrong way of thinking". It is up to us to teach them the proper ways of life...i.e. thinking of others, treating others kind and fare. having respect, using manners, showing love. If we sit back and wait for it to develope naturally as they grow and their brains develope they will bend and twist in their own direction...if we quide them proper, punish when needed, love appropriately and show them how to be we will end up with a well raised child who will ultimately become a terrific individual later in life. But you have to be very proactive in catching the little "wrong thinking" before it becomes Big wrong thinking!