HELP!!! This kid is really getting to me... :(

[Rhonda]

Rhonda isn't a very common name, nice to know another Rhonda

And, I don't run a food allergy home daycare in Ottawa

Thank you for the encouragement, I do find it is very difficult not to 'fight' back or even to know what to do with a case of slander. I hope the right family comes along soon. Just patience isn't my forte, lol.

[playfelt]

Parents forget that they did not "hire" us to care for their children. They "contracted" for our services fully knowing what they would and would not get for their money. Just because they have changed their minds doesn't mean we have to change our terms of service. If they are unhappy they can look somewhere else - provided they remember that a contract is just that and they have obligations to the caregiver before they are free to leave - ie sufficient notice and or payment in lieu of notice for one thing. There will always be disgruntled parents. Try not to let it bother you. Anyone that would believe what a complete stranger tells them is unlikely and anyone that knows the family either already knows what they are like anyways or if they belive the same the other family isn't right for your daycare either so better off with neither. There really are parents out there that will interview you in spite of what they have heard just so they can have the privilege of saying they made up their own mind and didnt' let others tell them what to do with their kids - those are the parents you want. Good luck and hope they come your way soon.

[mom-in-alberta]

Thanks everyone for your replies!! I really appreciate it. And wouldn't you know, this week has been going much better so far, hahahaha!
I will start by saying that I think that the problem lies in him receiving TOO MUCH attention at home, rather than not enough. His sister is 2 (just turned) and is fairly mild mannered, so he tends to be the domineering personality. His behaviour when his parents are here is vastly different than what I see during the day, and therefore I think he's rather adept at manipulating them. I already know that he wants his mom to stay home and not go to work, and that is for sure causing some of our issues. My pop-psychology diagnosis is that he is jealous of my daughter because she DOES get to stay home with her mommy all day, and that is exactly what he wants. He is definitely not used to the idea of not gettting what he wants.
Second, if I thought it was ultimately impacting my daughter in a negative fashion, I would not hesitate to change the situation. You are totally right, in that I chose this profession, not my kids. So far, I think it's irritating to her, but only in the moment. I have been reminding her what her expectations are, in hopes that her own behaviour will not change negatively. She still talks about this child as "her friend" though, so I think it bothers me more than her to be truthful!!
I believe I will try some new techniques, some of which unfortunately will require that the 2 of them are never out of my sight together. If it doesn't work, I suppose I will have to make a tough decision.
Thanks again!!
PS> This is EXACTLY why I have decided that ages 1 to 4 are my ideal!! I would rather be busy with their issues than *whine* "he said this.... she doesn't want to play what I want..." *whine* lol

[Skysue]

Thanks everyone for your replies!! I really appreciate it. And wouldn't you know, this week has been going much better so far, hahahaha!
I will start by saying that I think that the problem lies in him receiving TOO MUCH attention at home, rather than not enough. His sister is 2 (just turned) and is fairly mild mannered, so he tends to be the domineering personality. His behaviour when his parents are here is vastly different than what I see during the day, and therefore I think he's rather adept at manipulating them. I already know that he wants his mom to stay home and not go to work, and that is for sure causing some of our issues. My pop-psychology diagnosis is that he is jealous of my daughter because she DOES get to stay home with her mommy all day, and that is exactly what he wants. He is definitely not used to the idea of not gettting what he wants.
Second, if I thought it was ultimately impacting my daughter in a negative fashion, I would not hesitate to change the situation. You are totally right, in that I chose this profession, not my kids. So far, I think it's irritating to her, but only in the moment. I have been reminding her what her expectations are, in hopes that her own behaviour will not change negatively. She still talks about this child as "her friend" though, so I think it bothers me more than her to be truthful!!
I believe I will try some new techniques, some of which unfortunately will require that the 2 of them are never out of my sight together. If it doesn't work, I suppose I will have to make a tough decision.
Thanks again!!
PS> This is EXACTLY why I have decided that ages 1 to 4 are my ideal!! I would rather be busy with their issues than *whine* "he said this.... she doesn't want to play what I want..." *whine* lol

I know this is an old post but i am curious if it is still working out? I had a similar situation and had to say goodbye to one of my little ones. I still look after there younger sibling. It was the best decison I ever made! No more stress for me and my little one.

[mom-in-alberta]

Hey Sue... On the whole, things improved remarkably with this young boy. He and my daughter still have their confrontations, but their relationship got better and better as time went on.
I don't know that it was any specific thing that I did, except continue to remind him that we have certain expectations about how people are treated in my home. I watched them closely for warning signs, and if I felt like either of them was "in a mood", I would give some ahead of time warnings or simply not allow them to play away from my prying eyes.
Unfortunately, wouldn't you know it, I just found out that this family will be done at the end of the month. Oh well, I never really did get to "LIKE" this little boy. I cared for him, but I don't think he is of a personality that I particularly enjoy having around, if that makes sense.
I was wondering; how did you manage to keep a younger sibling, and let go of an older one???

[Skysue]

Hey Sue... On the whole, things improved remarkably with this young boy. He and my daughter still have their confrontations, but their relationship got better and better as time went on.
I don't know that it was any specific thing that I did, except continue to remind him that we have certain expectations about how people are treated in my home. I watched them closely for warning signs, and if I felt like either of them was "in a mood", I would give some ahead of time warnings or simply not allow them to play away from my prying eyes.
Unfortunately, wouldn't you know it, I just found out that this family will be done at the end of the month. Oh well, I never really did get to "LIKE" this little boy. I cared for him, but I don't think he is of a personality that I particularly enjoy having around, if that makes sense.
I was wondering; how did you manage to keep a younger sibling, and let go of an older one???

They decided to put the older child in Montisorri school as they understood his challenges and how busy he was. I told them I love there kids and would still love to look after the younger one! Who is an amazing baby!

My only problem right now is the Mom has asked me if i can watch him again for Aug, I can't. I hate saying no but i know it would be an unpleasent experiance. She keeps bringing him in my home when she picks up the little one and i can see he hasn't improved very much. He is a child that needs constant stimulation. My kids range from 17 months to 3 1/2 I can't just give one child my sole attention... I hate being in this situation.