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Thread: Naps....

  1. #1
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    Naps....

    My daughter is 11months old. She was going through teething/a cold which started a couple of weeks ago. She wouldn't sleep in her crib for naps, she wasn't feeling well, would only sleep on me in the rocking chair or in the car. Now she is feeling a lot better (still has a bit of a runny/stuffed nose) but still won't sleep in her crib for naps. I put her in but she cries right away, I leave the room and she sits up holding onto the bars like she's in jail. lol And she will cry until I get her or she is left a little bit and she falls asleep. I don't feel right leaving her in there crying so I tend to take her out after a bit (which I know isn't good but otherwise she cries for so long ).

    Would you leave her to cry? (and if yes, would you start "NOW" or wait until her nose clears up??)

    I always feel sooooo bad when she is so upset...when I pick her up she does that "chokes up and then takes a big breath/sigh of relief" She is so happy that I have comforted her...

    As an ECE, looking after other people's children I can solve problems so easily knowing if the situation calls for a bit of crying which will lesson with time etc. But for my own daughter my mind is foggy and I seem to be in a "bubble". I need advice from someone looking from the "outside".

    Thanks so much!!
    Last edited by BrightEyes; 11-30-2012 at 03:40 PM.
    "If we all could see the world through the eyes of a child, we would see the magic in everything!" - Chee Vai Tang

  2. #2
    Euphoric !
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    Well it seems she got into the habit of being rocked to sleep either by you or the car and either you are going to continue to do it or you have to break the habit by not doing it and if you pick her up after a certain amount Of time then that it teaching her that as long as she keeps crying you will eventually come get her but if you let her cry it out each day will get less and less and eventually it will stop but you have to be tough and be consistent.

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  4. #3
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    Thank you for your reply Crayola. You are right. I think I knew this deep down inside. I am going to have to let her cry it out. I have her best interest in mind. It is going to be SO hard for me. Oh goodness.....I hope I can be strong enough!
    "If we all could see the world through the eyes of a child, we would see the magic in everything!" - Chee Vai Tang

  5. #4
    Euphoric ! kidlove's Avatar
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    You can be strong enough IF you remind yourself what you are doing it for......not to torture you child, but to make her a "better" child. This is the first of MANY times you will feel like crumbling inside over the "right" thing to do. Raising children takes a lot of WILL! Its sooooo worth it in the end though.

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  7. #5
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    Thank you kidlove. When I read over my original post I couldn't help but laugh because it's obvious that I knew what I *should* do......but like you say, "it takes a lot of WILL!". Parents want what is best for their children, sometimes we need to take a step back, take ourselves out of the picture and control the situation from the child's point of view. (In this case she wants/needs to sleep, but she feels most comfortable with me so she will cry until I get her unless she cries herself to sleep and gets used to/comfortable with the routine again.)

    I really do appreciate the comments, it's nice to have the support and people to "talk it out" with!
    "If we all could see the world through the eyes of a child, we would see the magic in everything!" - Chee Vai Tang

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  9. #6
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    I know I am going to get a lot of disagrees here, but I personally feel it is harmful to let a child cry for hours on end. We assumably want our children to know we are there for them, crying alone in a dark room for hours until you collapse from exhaustion can only be a lonely, terrifying experience. I want my children to know that I am there for them when they need me, that they will not be left alone to figure things out for themselves until I know they are ready (crying for hours does not strike me as ready). I would check out "the no cry sleep solution" by Elizabeth Pantley it essentially has a strategy for crying it out that is more gentle and attentive to the childs needs than simply leaving them alone to cry for hours. Yes it will take longer, and probably mean less sleep for you for a little while longer, but you don't need to ignore your child for hours to accomplish sleeping through the night if you don't want to, there are other options.

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  11. #7
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    Yarnlover, I am open to all opinions, thank you for yours, I appreciate it. I personally don't feel "right" letting her cry....that's why I wrote this post.....however I don't know any other way that "works" so maybe I should look up that book.

    She sleeps through the night fine though. Has since 5 weeks!!! It's her naps during the day....which used to be fine. lol So I get enough sleep, that's probably why I have been fine with picking her up out of her crib when she cries.

    My concern is that she's not getting enough sleep during the day. her morning sleep is now 20-30mins usually (sleeping on me) and then her afternoon nap is 45mins-1hr or so which is with me driving around in the car. She's a pretty happy baby most of the time but she definitely has bags under her eyes from the lack of sleep during the day and in the evening she is sooooo tired.

    I feel bad leaving her to cry but I also feel bad that she is so tired.

    I have tried staying in the room, rubbing her back, singing to her, etc etc but as long as I am in the room she won't stay lying down, she cries and keeps sitting up. Even with me laying her back down over and over and over. She doesn't give up. lol
    "If we all could see the world through the eyes of a child, we would see the magic in everything!" - Chee Vai Tang

  12. #8
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    I think if the child never went to sleep on their own then maybe but since she used sleep fine but changed when she got a cold and was allowed other options then its just a matter of retraining

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  14. #9
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    There is also "the no cry nap solution" . Since she is going to bed fine at night, maybe it is a question of timing. Watching for the tired signs and starting a wind down routine before she becomes overtired and inconsolable may help.

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  16. #10
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    My daughter got really sick with tons of colds & ear infections from 11mos to 14mos and we had this happen too....not using the right words but she got "spoiled" sleeping being rocked and in my arms. I did have to re-train her and after trying almost everything out there CIO was the only thing that worked. It took only 2 full days (naps too) and she was back to her old self.

    Good Luck!
    Satisfaction Guaranteed or Double Your Kids Back!!

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