Vent/advice Oh the Drama!!

[Dreamalittledream]

Update on this little girl. I spoke to mom over my concerns about her ability to vocally express words/sentences & her drama/tantrums. Mom started to cry (she is so frustrated with the behaviours too). I feel so bad for this loving (adoptive) family. Her mom keeps saying "she is such a hard child & everyone thinks that I am just comparing her to her older brother". I assured her that I too agree that she has some challenges, but that I am not going anywhere and that we as a team will get through it (then we both cried). Behaviours that concern me with this 2 1/2 year old: Will not vocally express anything without prompting (does have the words, when we sit & look at books she will name all kinds of things), for the last 2 weeks she appears sullen & withdrawn...she just sits back & plays on her own all day (before she used to run & play with the others) (several times through the day I will sit in front of her and just hold her...but she remains the same after) and also if I (same exact behaviour at home) need to correct her (say "no" to her, which I do in a calm, quiet tone) or if her daily routine changes in the slightest way it immediately leads to a tantrum (often with head banging, or she will 'stand on her head' and stay that way until I move her). Oh and also, she has always needed a stool softener to have a BM. Mom has been referred to a specialist, hence the hearing aids as well as she is undergoing speech therapy. When the tantrums occur, I (just like at home) remove her to a chair telling her "when you are done crying you can come off the chair". This is all just ringing an alarm bell in my head that these are all signs of some underlying condition? She received the hearing aids in early July, how long do you think the adjustment process should be for those? She really is such a sweet, cuddly little one who is just so eager to understand what you want and to please....to see her going through all of this breaks my heart.